A life of drink
 

Hi!

My name's Robin and I live in North Wales, UK. I'm English but they let me in. I'm 55 now and if I want to reach 56 I need to stop drinking right now.
I had my frist beer in a pub when was about 11 years old, and even in my teens I knew I was alcoholic and had the recurrent thought that 'one day this will have to end' When I was vomiting blood this morning I realised at 6.00am that day had come .I wondered if I'd survive the day. It's now 9.00pm and I've managed a full day's work.
My wife's away visiting our grandson so I had a ciderfest. I've drifted in and out of AA several times. The word 'God' disturbs me although I am a fan of Buddhism and meditation. However, my addiction rules all. My problem (one of them) is I've always been able to put it down for periods before getting smashed again. I think I'm running out of space, I've bored you enough. Best Wishes: Robin

Welcome to the site robin...Lots of good advice and help here....

Robin, welcome to SR. You will find a great deal of support here. Keep coming back and best wishes to you!

Dom

Welcome Robin! Lots of support in here. Read and post lots.

Welcome to SR Robin :)

Don't let the G word scare ya. A closer look and I bet you'll find that most peoples higher power isn't god as a creator. But if it's a stumbling block for you at the moment you could always look into AVRT or SMART to help you x

Robin, I drank for most of my adult life. You have to give yourself enough sober time until your brain starts to reset itself and process the world around you in a sober state. I LOVED hanging out with my friends all night long laughing and being silly. I LOVED going into a strange bar, having a few drinks that loosened me up to talk to everyone around me. However, the price I paid for all the good times...were blackouts, money literally pissed away, hurt feelings for my family. Also I missed my brain! Being able to read books, watch movies, listen to music, have conversations that weren't clouded by booze. At your age, one of the great things is that you can, if you let yourself, reflect on many, many good things, and a clear head will let you remember the good things, and a clear head will let you put the bad things in a place where they belong, where you can reconcile them and find peace. Good luck.

Welcome Robin :)

It's never too late to turn things around - you'll find a ton of support here.

Check out our Class of November group thread to find more people here who are at the point you are :)

I also recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum if you think you may benefit from a non 12 step approach like SMART, LifeRing or Rational Recovery (AVRT).

D

It's wonderful to meet you, Robin. Your post was not boring - it was honest and real. :)

I drank all my life, too - into my 50's. Always in the back of my mind was the same thought you had - 'one day this will have to end'. I knew what was coming, but I never reached out for help. I let myself be brought to my knees before quitting. I insisted I could control it by using willpower to have just a few.

We're glad you're here, Robin. You aren't alone - you have a whole family of people who truly understand. You can do this.

Welcome Robin!! Glad you are making a move to save your Precious life ;-)

Welcome to the family! :grouphug: