day 6 - frustrated with legal system
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 85
day 6 - frustrated with legal system
Hi all,
I haven't posted for a while, but today is a milestone since it is day 6... and the first day 6 I have seen since I was 18. I'm actually feeling ok, I know I CAN'T drink for a few months because I'm on random drug/alcohol testing for a BS domestic violence charge. The testing actually makes it easier not to drink, since it's not worth the risk of going to jail and basically ruining my whole life.
Even though I'm doing ok sober right now, I'm really frustrated with the legal system. I'm sure a lot of you have had similar experiences... It has dragged me through the mud. I have a good job and I keep having to miss work to go to court, meet with my PO, go to alcohol and violence classes, do community service, etc. And the cost is RIDICULOUS. I have already paid close to $10,000 so far for legal fees, court fees, jail fees, assessments, classes, drug testing... and I not only have to do community service, I have to PAY to do community service. This system is exhausting, and I will be dealing with it for the next 6-9 months IF I do everything perfectly. All this for a misdemeanor harassment charge!
I guess the silver lining is that I've finally been able to escape the abusive relationship I was in for years... it's wonderful having that guy out of my life.
Anyways, just thought I'd vent, since usually I'd drink to relieve stress, but can't do that anymore! Hopefully everything will work out, just took my first drug test and etg alcohol test a few days ago. I don't do drugs at all, so that should be fine, and my last drink was >80 hours before the test. So hopefully all is well. Thanks for listening
I haven't posted for a while, but today is a milestone since it is day 6... and the first day 6 I have seen since I was 18. I'm actually feeling ok, I know I CAN'T drink for a few months because I'm on random drug/alcohol testing for a BS domestic violence charge. The testing actually makes it easier not to drink, since it's not worth the risk of going to jail and basically ruining my whole life.
Even though I'm doing ok sober right now, I'm really frustrated with the legal system. I'm sure a lot of you have had similar experiences... It has dragged me through the mud. I have a good job and I keep having to miss work to go to court, meet with my PO, go to alcohol and violence classes, do community service, etc. And the cost is RIDICULOUS. I have already paid close to $10,000 so far for legal fees, court fees, jail fees, assessments, classes, drug testing... and I not only have to do community service, I have to PAY to do community service. This system is exhausting, and I will be dealing with it for the next 6-9 months IF I do everything perfectly. All this for a misdemeanor harassment charge!
I guess the silver lining is that I've finally been able to escape the abusive relationship I was in for years... it's wonderful having that guy out of my life.
Anyways, just thought I'd vent, since usually I'd drink to relieve stress, but can't do that anymore! Hopefully everything will work out, just took my first drug test and etg alcohol test a few days ago. I don't do drugs at all, so that should be fine, and my last drink was >80 hours before the test. So hopefully all is well. Thanks for listening
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 85
Originally Posted by MIRecovery 
I did not get in trouble everytime I drank but everytime I got in trouble was because of drinking. You may wish to consider giving it up for good.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 133
I never understood why they let the punishment interfere with your job. I understand they want it to be difficult but if folks lose their job, they will typically spiral downward. I used to have to miss work to drive 45 minutes to an office to take a breathalyzer - and I had a breathalyzer in my car at that time. So - take 1.5 hours off work, blow to start the car, blow at the office, blow to start the car, return to work, eat lunch at desk, work an hour later in the evening. Seemed like overkill to me. I know we always want an easier softer way, but really? Too bad the system doesn't look deeper at what really curbs recidivism. Of course, then they would be out of $, so there you have it.
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 85
MI, I haven't thought about a plan for forever yet... I'm just taking things as they come now. Hopefully I can figure something out before I go off of monitoring. I have been trying to adopt a healthier lifestyle and go mostly vegan and start taking vitamins again.
Solstice, glad you can relate. Thankfully I have a job where I can usually disappear for a while and not be noticed... but how many times can you tell your boss you have a "doctors appointment"? And with the classes - you have only ONE OPTION which is during the day on a weekday. If that doesn't work for you, you can drive 2 hours away to another town where they have ONE OPTION during the day on a weekday. And I live in a major metropolitan area. I think there are less options though, since I have to go to the all-female classes.
Thankfully I have a flexible (enough) job and enough room on my credit cards for all this nonsense... I feel bad for all the people who aren't so lucky. Last time I was in court, I sat and listened to person after person beg the judge to give them until one more paycheck to pay their fees... and one by one, the judge sent them back to jail. It doesn't matter if you complete all your classes - if you can't afford the fees, they will throw you back in jail, causing you to lose your job. The system really needs an overhaul - no wonder jails are overcrowded.
Solstice, glad you can relate. Thankfully I have a job where I can usually disappear for a while and not be noticed... but how many times can you tell your boss you have a "doctors appointment"? And with the classes - you have only ONE OPTION which is during the day on a weekday. If that doesn't work for you, you can drive 2 hours away to another town where they have ONE OPTION during the day on a weekday. And I live in a major metropolitan area. I think there are less options though, since I have to go to the all-female classes.
Thankfully I have a flexible (enough) job and enough room on my credit cards for all this nonsense... I feel bad for all the people who aren't so lucky. Last time I was in court, I sat and listened to person after person beg the judge to give them until one more paycheck to pay their fees... and one by one, the judge sent them back to jail. It doesn't matter if you complete all your classes - if you can't afford the fees, they will throw you back in jail, causing you to lose your job. The system really needs an overhaul - no wonder jails are overcrowded.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Canada. About as far south as you can get
Posts: 4,768
Originally Posted by SnowDaisy
Hi all,
I haven't posted for a while, but today is a milestone since it is day 6... and the first day 6 I have seen since I was 18. I'm actually feeling ok, I know I CAN'T drink for a few months because I'm on random drug/alcohol testing for a BS domestic violence charge. The testing actually makes it easier not to drink, since it's not worth the risk of going to jail and basically ruining my whole life.
Even though I'm doing ok sober right now, I'm really frustrated with the legal system. I'm sure a lot of you have had similar experiences... It has dragged me through the mud. I have a good job and I keep having to miss work to go to court, meet with my PO, go to alcohol and violence classes, do community service, etc. And the cost is RIDICULOUS. I have already paid close to $10,000 so far for legal fees, court fees, jail fees, assessments, classes, drug testing... and I not only have to do community service, I have to PAY to do community service. This system is exhausting, and I will be dealing with it for the next 6-9 months IF I do everything perfectly. All this for a misdemeanor harassment charge!
I guess the silver lining is that I've finally been able to escape the abusive relationship I was in for years... it's wonderful having that guy out of my life.
Anyways, just thought I'd vent, since usually I'd drink to relieve stress, but can't do that anymore! Hopefully everything will work out, just took my first drug test and etg alcohol test a few days ago. I don't do drugs at all, so that should be fine, and my last drink was >80 hours before the test. So hopefully all is well. Thanks for listening
I haven't posted for a while, but today is a milestone since it is day 6... and the first day 6 I have seen since I was 18. I'm actually feeling ok, I know I CAN'T drink for a few months because I'm on random drug/alcohol testing for a BS domestic violence charge. The testing actually makes it easier not to drink, since it's not worth the risk of going to jail and basically ruining my whole life.
Even though I'm doing ok sober right now, I'm really frustrated with the legal system. I'm sure a lot of you have had similar experiences... It has dragged me through the mud. I have a good job and I keep having to miss work to go to court, meet with my PO, go to alcohol and violence classes, do community service, etc. And the cost is RIDICULOUS. I have already paid close to $10,000 so far for legal fees, court fees, jail fees, assessments, classes, drug testing... and I not only have to do community service, I have to PAY to do community service. This system is exhausting, and I will be dealing with it for the next 6-9 months IF I do everything perfectly. All this for a misdemeanor harassment charge!
I guess the silver lining is that I've finally been able to escape the abusive relationship I was in for years... it's wonderful having that guy out of my life.
Anyways, just thought I'd vent, since usually I'd drink to relieve stress, but can't do that anymore! Hopefully everything will work out, just took my first drug test and etg alcohol test a few days ago. I don't do drugs at all, so that should be fine, and my last drink was >80 hours before the test. So hopefully all is well. Thanks for listening
Perhaps the legal system is more frustrated with you than you are with them ....
All the best.
Bob R
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 85
Bob,
It really was BS. I was beat up by my ex in an argument, when the cops got there I was bruised and bloody, but I refused to tell them what happened because I was afraid of what he'd do to me. The cops said if I told them he did that to me, they would arrest him for assault. I didn't cooperate, so they arrested me. I live in one of the top 2 states for harsh domestic violence laws. Never been in trouble before, never will be again.
It really was BS. I was beat up by my ex in an argument, when the cops got there I was bruised and bloody, but I refused to tell them what happened because I was afraid of what he'd do to me. The cops said if I told them he did that to me, they would arrest him for assault. I didn't cooperate, so they arrested me. I live in one of the top 2 states for harsh domestic violence laws. Never been in trouble before, never will be again.
Powerless over Alcohol
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Trudging the Road to Happy Destiny!
Posts: 4,018
Glad your okay .
Well all I can add is , if you work a program and stay sober. You will be able to reflect back on this charge. And it just could be the best thing for you. Pherhaps due to drinking is why you keep yourself in that world to be in that position.
I know I had my times with court and judges and jails , po's, drug/alcohol test blah blah blah. Well guess what, no matter how you look at it. At the root of all the trouble of it is ME.
AA saved me from my way of living.
Well all I can add is , if you work a program and stay sober. You will be able to reflect back on this charge. And it just could be the best thing for you. Pherhaps due to drinking is why you keep yourself in that world to be in that position.
I know I had my times with court and judges and jails , po's, drug/alcohol test blah blah blah. Well guess what, no matter how you look at it. At the root of all the trouble of it is ME.
AA saved me from my way of living.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Bridgeton
Posts: 718
Hear ya Loud n Clear!! Every time I got into trouble the was ol' demon alcohol by my side and at the root of it all. "Alcohol IS A TAKER!" It takes your money, your common sense, your judgement, friends, family, money, sometimes LIVES. If I had back all the money I pad for fines, surcharges, legal fees, loss of work, loss of vehicles, insurance increases...I would be rich! I can NOT drive for 8 1/2 more years as a result of my 3rd DUI!! And that has taken my freedom also! It also took away 6 months of my life in jail!! I will never get that all back, but I don't drink anymore. So I never have to cross those evil paths again. Over 20 months sober & plan to stay that way the rest of my life. Stop now, you won't regret it!
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