Now what?
A Day at a Time
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Grand Rapids MI
Posts: 6,435
Dieing is never an option because you will only hurt those you love more than you could imagine and is the most selfish thing you could do.
Does drugs/alcohol have anything to do with your current situation?
Does drugs/alcohol have anything to do with your current situation?
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,494
I understand the desperation and hopelessness that you feel.
Use those strong emotions to help you make a choice to live a sober life. Are you willing to make the changes that you will need to make?
Use those strong emotions to help you make a choice to live a sober life. Are you willing to make the changes that you will need to make?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
Drinking will make you more depressed, because alcohol is a depressant and because you will be worrying about yourself more (and understandably so). It helps to get a counselor, or at least a friend. If your problem is drugs and/or alcohol, it's helpful to get a friend who is in recovery and/or join a group which deals with recovery. Perhaps you know all this already. If you just isolate and sit around by yourself this often makes it worse. It helps to get out and do something, like jog or some other sport, or something you like to do, other than drink or drug.
W.
W.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 35
I drink beer. Daily 4-7 beers. I quit drinking for 5 months months only to pick it up again when I quit tobacco. They say when you quit one addiction you take up another. I have taken it up again big time.
Only thing is I hate it. I hate so much about it. Yet it seems to be the thing that I sacrafice everything for.
Only thing is I hate it. I hate so much about it. Yet it seems to be the thing that I sacrafice everything for.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,494
I think the substitution happens when you don't deal with the underlying issues. Stopping drinking is the first step, but for me, I had to take a hard look at myself and be completely honest about what I saw. I needed to stop trying to control everything in my life. I needed to be accept that I could only control my behaviour. I needed to forgive myself for mistakes I had made. Recovery is a beautiful journey and each day you can get stronger.
A Day at a Time
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Grand Rapids MI
Posts: 6,435
There are many paths to sobriety and methods or combinations of methods. For me I went to out patient rehab for 3 months, then out patient rehab and AA for 1 month, then just AA. I also used the AVRT in early sobriety. I currently go to 4-5 AA meetings a week and am happier than at any point in my life. I have a dry house, avoid alcohol situations, have a ton of sober friends, have a strong relationship with a higher power and help others where ever I can.
Do some research, listen to people with long term sobriety, read the first 164 pages of AA's big book but read up on any treatment method that seems to fit. I would highly recommend developing some sort of support group that you can rely on when the going gets tough. I found I could not do this on my own but others have been able to just quit.
In reality I keep sober a day at a time by doing what I need to do in order to stay sober for that day. So far it has worked
Do some research, listen to people with long term sobriety, read the first 164 pages of AA's big book but read up on any treatment method that seems to fit. I would highly recommend developing some sort of support group that you can rely on when the going gets tough. I found I could not do this on my own but others have been able to just quit.
In reality I keep sober a day at a time by doing what I need to do in order to stay sober for that day. So far it has worked
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 134
“Life is painful and messed up. It gets complicated at the worst of times, and sometimes you have no idea where to go or what to do. Lots of times people just let themselves get lost, dropping into a wide open, huge abyss. But that's why we have to keep trying. We have to push through all that hurts us, work past all our memories that are haunting us. Sometimes the things that hurt us are the things that make us strongest. A life without experience, in my opinion, is no life at all. And that's why I tell everyone that, even when it hurts, never stop yourself from living.”
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 35
Strength, belief and choices.
I don't feel strong enough to try to do something that I fear I will fail at. Quitting by it's name should be easy right? But it is only made more difficult with the added pressure of failing.
I believe that priorities get done so if it's not a priority, until someone or something makes it that way, then quitting doesn't get done. My wife is leaving me now so it is a HUGE priority.
I chose to drink. I should be able to chose to stop. Is that an idiots statement or am I just ignorant?
Some great people on this board trying to help. Thank you. I'm sorry for your struggles but congratulate you for each day you chose to be sober and succeed.
I don't feel strong enough to try to do something that I fear I will fail at. Quitting by it's name should be easy right? But it is only made more difficult with the added pressure of failing.
I believe that priorities get done so if it's not a priority, until someone or something makes it that way, then quitting doesn't get done. My wife is leaving me now so it is a HUGE priority.
I chose to drink. I should be able to chose to stop. Is that an idiots statement or am I just ignorant?
Some great people on this board trying to help. Thank you. I'm sorry for your struggles but congratulate you for each day you chose to be sober and succeed.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 35
Originally Posted by Twenties 
“Life is painful and messed up. It gets complicated at the worst of times, and sometimes you have no idea where to go or what to do. Lots of times people just let themselves get lost, dropping into a wide open, huge abyss. But that's why we have to keep trying. We have to push through all that hurts us, work past all our memories that are haunting us. Sometimes the things that hurt us are the things that make us strongest. A life without experience, in my opinion, is no life at all. And that's why I tell everyone that, even when it hurts, never stop yourself from living.”
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,424
Hi 4kidsdad
For a long time I simply had no choice...I'd painted myself into a corner where my only mechanism for dealing with life was to drink.
To break that cycle I needed support. I found it here - I recommend you become a regular poster and join a support thread like the Class of November...you'll find lot of people there at around your point of recovery.
There are a lot of face to face options too:
Here's some links to some of the main recovery players for you to look at:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html
I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum if you think you may benefit from a non 12 step approach.
D
For a long time I simply had no choice...I'd painted myself into a corner where my only mechanism for dealing with life was to drink.
To break that cycle I needed support. I found it here - I recommend you become a regular poster and join a support thread like the Class of November...you'll find lot of people there at around your point of recovery.
There are a lot of face to face options too:
Here's some links to some of the main recovery players for you to look at:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html
I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum if you think you may benefit from a non 12 step approach.
D
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