checking in...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Australia
Posts: 42
checking in...
It's time I shared my problem with someone, and this looks like a good place....
I've been drinking at least a bottle of wine every night for the last couple of years, along with a bottle of scotch over the weekend. I mostly drink alone as my partner has cut back her drinking, I don't go out, just drink on the couch. What a depressing way to live (well, it's not really living).
I don't drink during the day but when I knock off work I get the urge to drink again. I've tried cutting back/giving up a few times, but I end up buying wine on the way home and continue the routine. No doubt there's a physical addiction there, but I feel it's mostly just habit, and subconsciously I don't want to deal with the boredom of my life. Drinking helps me avoid dealing with a few issues in my life.
So, onwards and upwards. Just poured half a bottle of wine down the sink, and will get my partner to take a couple of full bottles to her house, so there is no alcohol in my house. I plan to limit myself to only drinking in company, and never in my house (unless I hold a bbq or party here, which rarely happens). I'll go back to the gym (I was a gym addict for a while, but better to be addicted to exercise than alcohol), and might look into martial arts classes. I also want to learn Spanish and improve my guitar playing, so I think all that should a provide enough distractions.
My biggest hurdle will be 5pm today, when I have to choose NOT to stop at the bottle shop....
I've been drinking at least a bottle of wine every night for the last couple of years, along with a bottle of scotch over the weekend. I mostly drink alone as my partner has cut back her drinking, I don't go out, just drink on the couch. What a depressing way to live (well, it's not really living).
I don't drink during the day but when I knock off work I get the urge to drink again. I've tried cutting back/giving up a few times, but I end up buying wine on the way home and continue the routine. No doubt there's a physical addiction there, but I feel it's mostly just habit, and subconsciously I don't want to deal with the boredom of my life. Drinking helps me avoid dealing with a few issues in my life.
So, onwards and upwards. Just poured half a bottle of wine down the sink, and will get my partner to take a couple of full bottles to her house, so there is no alcohol in my house. I plan to limit myself to only drinking in company, and never in my house (unless I hold a bbq or party here, which rarely happens). I'll go back to the gym (I was a gym addict for a while, but better to be addicted to exercise than alcohol), and might look into martial arts classes. I also want to learn Spanish and improve my guitar playing, so I think all that should a provide enough distractions.
My biggest hurdle will be 5pm today, when I have to choose NOT to stop at the bottle shop....
A Day at a Time
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Grand Rapids MI
Posts: 6,435
Unfortunately moderation is not an option. I spent 25 years of pain and suffering proving that to myself and there are likely 100 people on SR that will tell you the same thing. I limited myself to only drinking on the days that ended in Y
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,678
Sounds like you have plenty of things there to keep life from getting boring Switch 
I could have written your post a few years ago. I am glad you have found SR when you have because I found my drinking got worse when I tried stopping. I'm sure you will find the support here useful. I had problems debating whether to stop off to buy booze or not and I found AVRT really helpful to me to combat those thoughts (Google Rational Recovery if you are interested). It is generally used for complete abstinence but I have read about it being used to have 'alcohol free days' on the HAMS website.
Glad you are here x
I could have written your post a few years ago. I am glad you have found SR when you have because I found my drinking got worse when I tried stopping. I'm sure you will find the support here useful. I had problems debating whether to stop off to buy booze or not and I found AVRT really helpful to me to combat those thoughts (Google Rational Recovery if you are interested). It is generally used for complete abstinence but I have read about it being used to have 'alcohol free days' on the HAMS website.
Glad you are here x
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 28
Hi Switch, welcome to SR, you'll find lots of advice and support here.
Your story sounds very like my own - bottle of wine a day, maybe more on weekends, and bottle of vodka or scotch a week. In my case this went on for many many years. Really wish you every success, and just wanted to say that when you get alcohol free you are going to feel great (I want to emphasise that I didnt actually appreciate how much better I would feel physically and mentally.)
Careful with the initial detox, remember to drink lots of water/juice, and also eat good stuff.
I found the book 'Under the Influence' very enlightening about alcohol's effects on the body and brain.
Make a plan to be doing something at 5.00 p.m. too.
Good luck.
Your story sounds very like my own - bottle of wine a day, maybe more on weekends, and bottle of vodka or scotch a week. In my case this went on for many many years. Really wish you every success, and just wanted to say that when you get alcohol free you are going to feel great (I want to emphasise that I didnt actually appreciate how much better I would feel physically and mentally.)
Careful with the initial detox, remember to drink lots of water/juice, and also eat good stuff.
I found the book 'Under the Influence' very enlightening about alcohol's effects on the body and brain.
Make a plan to be doing something at 5.00 p.m. too.
Good luck.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Australia
Posts: 42
Thanks for all the prompt replies, I'm hoping that having a a support group here will help me get over this first hurdle. I live in a small country town, and I'm in a high profile position at work so I don't want to air my dirty laundry in public - so going to a support group in person is not really an option for me.
I really want to work towards being alcohol free at home but still having a few glasses of wine at dinners - I regularly entertain visiting business clients/colleagues and unfortunately (?) good wine and good food are part of the deal. I can completely control my drinking when I'm out socially, that's not a problem for me, it's at home where I have a problem. I'm hoping I can draw the line between drinking socially and drinking at home....
I have actually quit before, went a few days alcohol free, so I think I can handle the physical withdrawal. It's the motivation to stay off the grog that I'm lacking. A few years back when I was training hard at the gym I was actually a non-drinker, so if I have the motivation I know I can do it.
This forum is great, I've learnt a lot already. I'll spend some time looking at that Rational Recovery site tonight.
I really want to work towards being alcohol free at home but still having a few glasses of wine at dinners - I regularly entertain visiting business clients/colleagues and unfortunately (?) good wine and good food are part of the deal. I can completely control my drinking when I'm out socially, that's not a problem for me, it's at home where I have a problem. I'm hoping I can draw the line between drinking socially and drinking at home....
I have actually quit before, went a few days alcohol free, so I think I can handle the physical withdrawal. It's the motivation to stay off the grog that I'm lacking. A few years back when I was training hard at the gym I was actually a non-drinker, so if I have the motivation I know I can do it.
This forum is great, I've learnt a lot already. I'll spend some time looking at that Rational Recovery site tonight.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,385
Hi and welcome switch
I drank like you did - and then beyond that to all day everyday.
If you feel what you have is a bad habit then it probably should be possible to stop without too much trouble.
I have to be honest with you tho and say what I found was there was no social drinking for me again.
every time I tried, no matter how that evening went (some went ok, many did not) I always always found myself back on that couch...
I had to accept that my relationship with alcohol was toxic, and that every time I ingested alcohol it changed me, and not in a good way.
Of course this is your story - but I recommend 90 days no drinking at all - you should work out whether it's a habit or not that way
D
I drank like you did - and then beyond that to all day everyday.
If you feel what you have is a bad habit then it probably should be possible to stop without too much trouble.
I have to be honest with you tho and say what I found was there was no social drinking for me again.
every time I tried, no matter how that evening went (some went ok, many did not) I always always found myself back on that couch...
I had to accept that my relationship with alcohol was toxic, and that every time I ingested alcohol it changed me, and not in a good way.
Of course this is your story - but I recommend 90 days no drinking at all - you should work out whether it's a habit or not that way
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Australia
Posts: 42
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Hi and welcome switch
I drank like you did - and then beyond that to all day everyday.
If you feel what you have is a bad habit then it probably should be possible to stop without too much trouble.
I have to be honest with you tho and say what I found was there was no social drinking for me again.
every time I tried, no matter how that evening went (some went ok, many did not) I always always found myself back on that couch...
I had to accept that my relationship with alcohol was toxic, and that every time I ingested alcohol it changed me, and not in a good way.
Of course this is your story - but I recommend 90 days no drinking at all - you should work out whether it's a habit or not that way
D
I drank like you did - and then beyond that to all day everyday.
If you feel what you have is a bad habit then it probably should be possible to stop without too much trouble.
I have to be honest with you tho and say what I found was there was no social drinking for me again.
every time I tried, no matter how that evening went (some went ok, many did not) I always always found myself back on that couch...
I had to accept that my relationship with alcohol was toxic, and that every time I ingested alcohol it changed me, and not in a good way.
Of course this is your story - but I recommend 90 days no drinking at all - you should work out whether it's a habit or not that way
D
I get the feeling this is going to be harder than I think....
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,678
Originally Posted by Switch
Thanks D, good advice, but there's my problem. 90 days would cover two social events and Christmas, and I can't picture myself avoiding alcohol for those events. In fact I don't really want to, I enjoy the social interaction that a good bottle of wine or a few beers provides. But I hate the way I drink at home.
I get the feeling this is going to be harder than I think....
I get the feeling this is going to be harder than I think....
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 8,334
Welcome Switch,
I drank wine daily. I tried to stop drinking except in social situations in the summer of 2011. It went ok at first. I realized in the spring of 2012, that I was back to square one. I quit for good in June 2012. The first 3-7 days were the hardest, but I found it easier than trying to moderate. I recently attended several social occasions and have done well without drinking. Again, welcome and keep posting
I drank wine daily. I tried to stop drinking except in social situations in the summer of 2011. It went ok at first. I realized in the spring of 2012, that I was back to square one. I quit for good in June 2012. The first 3-7 days were the hardest, but I found it easier than trying to moderate. I recently attended several social occasions and have done well without drinking. Again, welcome and keep posting
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,537
Hi Switch, and welcome. I don't know why we cling to it, even when we realize it's no longer fun or enjoyable. It just sucks the life out of us. Glad you have decided to make a change in your life.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 2,937
2nd Christmas for me without booze coming up and I already know it will be better than the drunken ones.
I have to 'entertain' at work and I never drink now. I think I am a sharper more switched on person for it.
See how you go, come here and read a lot and post too.
It's nice to have you with us x
I have to 'entertain' at work and I never drink now. I think I am a sharper more switched on person for it.
See how you go, come here and read a lot and post too.
It's nice to have you with us x
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 590
Welcome Switch good luck. I had to find out on my own that I couldn't moderate too. Cut way back and thought I was doing real good until I finally realized I was drinking just as much as I was before. That's when I realized it was all or nothing.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Australia
Posts: 42
Originally Posted by hypochondriac
You could do worse than checking out Allen Carr's book Easyway to control your drinking. He really changed the way I view addiction and especially when it comes to social events.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Australia
Posts: 42
Well, this forum was a good find :-)
I've been too busy reading to think about having a drink (there is a nagging urge there but I'm able to ignore it for now). I'm feeling really positive about this working.
I substituted my bottle shop visit for a gym visit and feel so much better for it. I then dragged out an old scientific journal I had about alcohols negative effects on Testosterone production which gave me more motivation to stop drinking.
But really, it was the thought that I'd told you folks I was not going to drink that made me feel accountable... so thanks just for being here :-)
I've been too busy reading to think about having a drink (there is a nagging urge there but I'm able to ignore it for now). I'm feeling really positive about this working.
I substituted my bottle shop visit for a gym visit and feel so much better for it. I then dragged out an old scientific journal I had about alcohols negative effects on Testosterone production which gave me more motivation to stop drinking.
But really, it was the thought that I'd told you folks I was not going to drink that made me feel accountable... so thanks just for being here :-)
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: San Diego
Posts: 611
Hi Switch welcome to SR! Like many others have said, I attempted to moderate and was unsuccessful but I think cutting down is still better than not, if you can do it. Going to the gym on the way home is a good idea. I am totally addicted to running! It gives me such a better rush than drugs or booze!
Good luck to you and I hope you keep coming here to share your story with us!
Good luck to you and I hope you keep coming here to share your story with us!
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