Georgiaonmymind

New guy here! I'm just trying to figure out if I am or am not an alcoholic.

I'm 19, live in Georgia and I'm an aircraft mechanic... I make okay money, have 6 months left before I can take my FAA test to be a licensed aircraft mechanic. Currently in college for a related degree. Single, busy work and school schedule, distant family, no friends outside work, no girlfriend.

Since I was 15 or so I've drank pretty much every single night. 95% just enough to get a buzz and pass out (I have a very restless mind, alcohol kinda helps me just slow down)... I don't really have any friends because I've always been kind of anti social, horrible with women. To be honest, I've been depressed for most of my life. I find the world repulsive and I honestly just drink to make things not seem quite so bad. I don't do drugs, smoked a joint or 2 in highschool but that was short lived.

I've never driven drunk, I've never missed a class/work because i was hungover and I've never come to class/work drunk. I can't say I've ever really had anything negative happen to me because of my drinking except, "beer farts". I don't like going to parties or anything like that... Pretty much just like to sit at the house with my dogs, drink beer and watch the history channel when I'm free and try to do that every single day. I'm not sure if I have a physical addiction to alcohol or not...

I've had people, mainly young people my age in class who know what I do on my spare time say that I am an alcoholic. But being said, is what I'm doing really all that bad?

Just looking for opinions.

Splasho

My first reaction to your post was: then why are you here?
Today is my first day on SR as well, and there's a reason I sought out this page and a support group. You know why you are here. If you are drinking daily at 19, where is that going to lead? I didn't start drinking daily until 25, I am now 30, and I can't tell you how much s%$# I put myself through because of drinking. My life, relationships, finances would be completely different if I had stopped at 25. But I can't look back now, only forward and hope for better things with a sober me. You on the other hand can stop yourself before it gets to where a lot of us on here have been. You have answers within you, but also lots of people here for support.

zanzibar

Welcome. Have you ever tried stop for a month or two before, that will soon tell you. Read around and see if you relate to anyone.

Georgiaonmymind

My mother and father drink daily as well. Very successful people, great to get along with. I can't remember a time when they didn't drink every day. Never had any problems except a BS open container violation that got thrown out.

I'm just really asking, is it really alcoholism if there are no adverse affects on your life?

zanzibar

You mean if it hasn't caused problems yet. Try what I suggested and see if it's hard to stop and if your life revolves around drinking. What do you have to lose other than saving a few dollars. Think of it as stepping back and taking a good look at your life. Maybe you're not an alcoholic but something brought you here.

Georgiaonmymind

My life actually doesn't revolve around drinking. I actually collect firearms, shoot competitively and recreationally. I also do some gun smith work from time to time on my stuff or "friends", little spare money but it's more about the challenge of perfection.

But sadly, can't do that kind of stuff all the time. Often I only have time to come in, drink a few beers, maybe watch a show or two while surfing the web and then pass out.

So yea, I actually go out and do fun things. I enjoy other activity's other than drinking.

jstar

I agree with zanzibar and all the other posts as well actually. When I first found this site quite some time ago, I was desperate. I was searching out recovery sites & AA etc (while completely trashed) but I ended up here because I thought maybe, just maybe, I had a problem with alcohol. Turns out I didn't stumble upon this site by accident & it has been a great resource for me.

I've heard this in/from AA - something about if you think you might have a problem with alcohol, go a time without drinking. See how you feel emotionally, physically etc. For me, when I first started to see my addiction in myself I was horrified at the thought of never being able to drink again, I couldn't even imagine my life without alcohol. I cried for weeks - I thought my life was going to be over. It took me almost 2 years from that point - to get to a place of acceptance. Those 2 years I did a lot of damage to the people around me.

also, what i agree most with zanzibar about is the "yet". I kept a job, house, husband, 4 kids & my own business going while full blown into my addiction to alcohol. I thank God every day that I didn't lose everything but there were many times that I came very close to losing it all.

I wish you the best of luck & stick around and see what others are saying. You may or may not be an alcoholic, that is for you to decide~

Dee74

Hi Georgiaonmymind welcome

None of us can tell you if you have a problem or not. Only you can adjudicate on that score.

One question tho - if this the pinnacle of what you want your life to be...forever?

D

Georgiaonmymind

Well if I'm still in college classes in 10 years, I'll be fairly pissed off. Other than that, yea it's a pretty good life I live.

MrsKing

If you live a pretty good life, and alcohol is not a problem to you at all, why are you here?

It seems to me like you're trying to justify your drinking to a group of alcoholics so that we can tell you "you're all good" and you can continue on with your drinking.

Whatever you want to believe... the amount of alcohol you consume is doing you no good physically. Whether you're addicted to alcohol or alcohol is causing you problems in your life... well, none of us here can tell you that. It's a conclusion you have to come to yourself.

You're probably not going to get the answer you want here.

Jen31

Hi, GEorgia.
I started drinking in the evenings after work, to wind down before going to bed (@ 22yrs old). I was alone, had a great job, my own place and plenty to keep me busy until late evenings. Unfortunately, my drinking progressed, as did my depression. I soon realized, drinking was the #1 reason for my depression. Of course that didn't stop me. Here I am, 9 yrs later, trying to get my mind straight and work on things I've destroyed these past years (family, health, checking acct). You may not want to stop drinking right now because it helps you feel relaxed and helps you sleep, but if you can bring yourself to do it, this is the perfect time to make it happen.
Talk to your Dr about medication to help you sleep at night.
I wish you the absolute best. Take care!!

Dee74

I thought I'd lived my life at 19 too so I can't blame you for that one

Don't assume that your drinking will stay the same tho.

I drank for twenty years. Started about your age...the first ten years were, by my standards, if not always good, generally ok - a few problems here and there but nothing that stood out from hard drinking friends and family.

the last ten? were a nightmare.

I started as a binger...went on to be a nightly drinker...then a daily one, then an all day one....

My drinking never stood still, even when I did....it got worse and worse.

Its the nature of this beast.
I'm 45, and although I do what I can with what I have, I pretty much ruined my health.

You have an excellent opportunity to avoid the my mistakes and the other mistakes you're reading about here, GOMM...I hope you think about it.

D