What scares me about alcohol
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: east coast
Posts: 1,711
What scares me about alcohol
I was just watching Dr Drew's Rehab and one of the alcoholic patients had a seizure after 2 weeks of detox. I thought people were in the clear at that point, especially if they were on proper meds which she is. The thought of that ever happening to me (or anyone) is just terrifying. I started thinking about all the times I ate in a black out and could have choked to death or the times I was so dehydrated after a hangover and couldn't stop throwing up which led to my throat scratchy and swollen, feeling like I couldn't swallow or breathe right. I used to just cry and pray I could keep down a sip of water. So many scary things that could happen while we are under the influence. I want to keep these fears close to me as I continue my journey because sometimes the desire to drink still comes to mind. Crazy huh? I think I sent myself into an anxiety ridden state thinking about all of this. Hopefully writing it out will assuage my nervous system. Better than using booze 
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: east coast
Posts: 1,711
Yup closetorecovery, you describe the hell of a hangover pretty well. The anxiety is the WORST. I love waking up now, able to breathe normally without feeling like I am going to hyperventilate from a panic attack. Congrats on 27 days, that's awesome!
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Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Inbetween dances
Posts: 548
Qfm, I agree. I watched that episode too. I also wondered about the seziure. And I prayed to god and thanked him for not letting that happen to me. Seizures scare me. Funny, drunken. If hrs didn't scare me half as bad as what could happen to me after I quit! So glad that's all behind me now!
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Sober Recovery
Posts: 233
After binging to the point where I had to be sober for a day or two I'd get the cold sweats at night while having nightmares and then wake up heart pounding hallucinating and hearing voices. Scared out of my mind that something bad was going to happen so I wold just lay in bed paralyzed from shock or whatever. The next day I would wake up, and think all kinds of terrible crap that was going on and overstress about it (panic attacks)... body buzzing and shaking, stomach aches and bathroom trips that hurt. The only thing that made me feel better was alcohol. Thank you for reminding me, because I feel really good now 
. I never want to experience that again.
. I never want to experience that again.
Still I rise.
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Oh Canada!
Posts: 1,121
Speaking of anxiety as part of the hangover...does anyone know or has read anything about WHY this increases after years of drinking?
Years ago, i don't remember waking up with anxiety at ALL...slight fog and headache is all.
However, in the last year of drinking, the morning anxiety was horrifyingly awful.
Just curious if anyone came across the reasons for this?
Years ago, i don't remember waking up with anxiety at ALL...slight fog and headache is all.
However, in the last year of drinking, the morning anxiety was horrifyingly awful.
Just curious if anyone came across the reasons for this?
Still I rise.
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Oh Canada!
Posts: 1,121
deb,
srsly, it's one of the main reasons that motivated me to re-evaluate my relationship to alcohol and strive for sobriety. i couldn't take it anymore. i was taking the mornings off from work JUST to deal with the anxiety...waiting for it to lessen...so i could function semi-normally.
srsly, it's one of the main reasons that motivated me to re-evaluate my relationship to alcohol and strive for sobriety. i couldn't take it anymore. i was taking the mornings off from work JUST to deal with the anxiety...waiting for it to lessen...so i could function semi-normally.
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Sober Recovery
Posts: 233
I am assuming that the drug rewires your brain into "needing" it and the anxiety is a result of a chemical imbalance or something causing anxiety and other effects. Just like any other drug. It increases over time because alcohol addiction takes time to develop. I am sure drugs like meth and others cause this almost instantaneously. I have never done stuff like that though.
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,964
In a simplified account and my opinion on anxiety:
Alcohol is a depressant.
It depresses nerves, organs, organ systems, basically everything. When it is not in the body, the body attempts to re-regulate without that depressant. Unfortunately, the body can't really handle it, so things go a bit haywire.
Blood pressure can go off the charts when the body is no longer depressed (like a pressure cooker, the depressant lowers things, but take the lid off (or stop the alcohol consumption) and an explosion can occur).
The anxiety is part of the "haywire" or re-wiring. Anxiety can go through the roof. It's lack of depressant. As our tolerance increases, the body re-wires itself to accommodate to the increase in depressant. Take that depressant away, and things tend to "explode."
Everyone is different which is why it is Always Suggested Someone Gets A Medical Evaluation Before Detoxing.
For a "normal" person, a drink depresses their nervous system (and all systems). After drinking a bit, the normal person says, "I need to stop, I'm starting to feel this drink!" They're body systems can be depressed and they feel sleepy.
For an alcoholic, I drink, I start to feel the effect, and I want more and more.
My tolerance increases and I drink more and more and more and more and more to get the same effect I once had from less than I just drank. I drink more over time. When I, the alcoholic, drink, I don't get tired; I get "wired." The depressant tends to act as a stimulant for me. Normal people don't get this effect. Of course, there comes a point where I blackout or pass out. I really have had way too much (a normal person would have gotten ill before this point).
Although alcohol ACTS as a stimulant, it is still depressing my entire body. Again, the reason I need medical supervision or advice to detox is that what I feel and what is happening are quite different. Again, my anxiety increases even while drinking because of the stimulant-depressant action going on with my (alcoholic) body.
My alcoholism caused me to drink; I didn't drink and then become an alcoholic.
My anxiety which was once alleviated by alcohol, is now caused by the alcohol (over time or after stopping and starting again, or the day after I drank a lot).
And in my experience, crack cocaine and snorting cocaine or snorting "crank" (crank is meth before we learned to smoke it--I had only snorted it) also cause an increase in anxiety, although they are actually stimulants and not depressants, but that's another thread.
Alcohol is a depressant.
It depresses nerves, organs, organ systems, basically everything. When it is not in the body, the body attempts to re-regulate without that depressant. Unfortunately, the body can't really handle it, so things go a bit haywire.
Blood pressure can go off the charts when the body is no longer depressed (like a pressure cooker, the depressant lowers things, but take the lid off (or stop the alcohol consumption) and an explosion can occur).
The anxiety is part of the "haywire" or re-wiring. Anxiety can go through the roof. It's lack of depressant. As our tolerance increases, the body re-wires itself to accommodate to the increase in depressant. Take that depressant away, and things tend to "explode."
Everyone is different which is why it is Always Suggested Someone Gets A Medical Evaluation Before Detoxing.
For a "normal" person, a drink depresses their nervous system (and all systems). After drinking a bit, the normal person says, "I need to stop, I'm starting to feel this drink!" They're body systems can be depressed and they feel sleepy.
For an alcoholic, I drink, I start to feel the effect, and I want more and more.
My tolerance increases and I drink more and more and more and more and more to get the same effect I once had from less than I just drank. I drink more over time. When I, the alcoholic, drink, I don't get tired; I get "wired." The depressant tends to act as a stimulant for me. Normal people don't get this effect. Of course, there comes a point where I blackout or pass out. I really have had way too much (a normal person would have gotten ill before this point).
Although alcohol ACTS as a stimulant, it is still depressing my entire body. Again, the reason I need medical supervision or advice to detox is that what I feel and what is happening are quite different. Again, my anxiety increases even while drinking because of the stimulant-depressant action going on with my (alcoholic) body.
My alcoholism caused me to drink; I didn't drink and then become an alcoholic.
My anxiety which was once alleviated by alcohol, is now caused by the alcohol (over time or after stopping and starting again, or the day after I drank a lot).
And in my experience, crack cocaine and snorting cocaine or snorting "crank" (crank is meth before we learned to smoke it--I had only snorted it) also cause an increase in anxiety, although they are actually stimulants and not depressants, but that's another thread.
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,040
I have always been a worrier, but my anxiety has increased substantially the past few years. I am hoping this decreases the longer I am alcohol free. I have medication for anxiety and it would be nice not to need it at some point. I will be sober three weeks tomorrow.
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,964
My anxiety is now basically gone.
Although one day this summer, while getting ready for my first day of full time work in over 13 months, I knew I was late and I began feeling anxiety...
I thought this through and realized that my body and brain used to live in this state of anxiety and even though I had been sober just over a year, I was re-creating my old anxiety......and I remembered what someone said about alcoholics being rush junkies......
I do use the 12 steps of AA and I began a quick 10th step, which for me is a quick step 4 through 9....then......
I went back to step 3.
For me, I had faith that things would be okay. I took some deep breaths, chose to live in the moment and not in my fears (worrying about things I couldn't control while not addressing those things I could control), and I was able to get ready, catch the bus on time, get to work on time, and make it through that day.
I think that was the last time I really felt anxiety and definitely the last time I tried to create it.
Old habits can change if we put the work into changing them!
Although one day this summer, while getting ready for my first day of full time work in over 13 months, I knew I was late and I began feeling anxiety...
I thought this through and realized that my body and brain used to live in this state of anxiety and even though I had been sober just over a year, I was re-creating my old anxiety......and I remembered what someone said about alcoholics being rush junkies......
I do use the 12 steps of AA and I began a quick 10th step, which for me is a quick step 4 through 9....then......
I went back to step 3.
For me, I had faith that things would be okay. I took some deep breaths, chose to live in the moment and not in my fears (worrying about things I couldn't control while not addressing those things I could control), and I was able to get ready, catch the bus on time, get to work on time, and make it through that day.
I think that was the last time I really felt anxiety and definitely the last time I tried to create it.
Old habits can change if we put the work into changing them!
Still I rise.
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Oh Canada!
Posts: 1,121
Sugarbear, your posts really helped me understand some things.
That's so cool that you were able to get through some anxiety regarding work. I always go to the worst possible scenario when crap happens (this is deffo b/c of family upbringing). Alcohol became a way to cope with such fears and stressors, upon waking, I really just could not cope with the crushing anxiety.
You're an inspiration! Thank you
That's so cool that you were able to get through some anxiety regarding work. I always go to the worst possible scenario when crap happens (this is deffo b/c of family upbringing). Alcohol became a way to cope with such fears and stressors, upon waking, I really just could not cope with the crushing anxiety.
You're an inspiration! Thank you
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Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Vashon WA
Posts: 1,035
I'm afraid of ever going back to covering up my life with drinking. I think a lot of my anxiety came from procrastinating stuff that I needed to do. I got to the point with my drinking where any benefit that I got was vastly outweighed by bad side effects like anxiety and hangovers. Alcohol seems to interact with everything. I don't know how one could actually medicate anything while drinking. I barely even took aspirin while I was drinking because I was afraid of frying my organs. My friend has been on anti anxiety medications and he drinks like an alcoholic. It's frightening.
A Day at a Time
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Grand Rapids MI
Posts: 6,435
We are dealing with some very dangerous stuff. I am up to 4 people dead that I knew who could not stop drinking and it finally killed them. 3 suicides and 1 run over by a train.
So very very sad because there is a way to get sober.
So very very sad because there is a way to get sober.
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: London
Posts: 57
My brother killed himself on Skype last November (2011). He was in India. And he was an alcoholic too. I was planning to get really REALLY drunk on the anniversary. I hadn't planned to have given up (I'm on day24). I drank every day...all day. I'm getting a bit anxious as the anniversary approaches as all my friends will be expecting me out with them. I have avoided everyone in the last few weeks.
I've had all the symptoms/experiences all of you have written about above. Including seizures (horrible
)
I just pray I remain strong...I don't want to screw up as I so want to live......
I wish you all the best and send strength to all of you too x
I've had all the symptoms/experiences all of you have written about above. Including seizures (horrible
) I just pray I remain strong...I don't want to screw up as I so want to live......
I wish you all the best and send strength to all of you too x
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: California
Posts: 81
That episode scared me too, quitforme79. I'm at 18 days and have been feeling okay except still very fatigued most of the time and I freaked myself out into a panic attack after watching that episode thinking that could happen to me. But luckily I think the worst is over for me.
I also had horrible anxiety attacks as my alcoholism progressed. I think it was the body needing alcohol. I basically drank all day everyday so after sleeping for 7, 8, 9 however many hours without alcohol when I woke up I had to immediately start drinking to stop any kind of withdrawels (anxiety, etc.) from happening.
so glad to be over that now!
I also had horrible anxiety attacks as my alcoholism progressed. I think it was the body needing alcohol. I basically drank all day everyday so after sleeping for 7, 8, 9 however many hours without alcohol when I woke up I had to immediately start drinking to stop any kind of withdrawels (anxiety, etc.) from happening.
so glad to be over that now!
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Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 2,279
Many of you asking about the anxiety & why it gets worse as time goes on. Here is the best article I have read about not only the anxiety getting worse but the drinking & effects, its called Kindling http://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publicatio...22-1/25-34.pdf
All of the best in your recovery
All of the best in your recovery
Clear Eyes Full Heart
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 1,272
Keeping the focus on the negative physical side effects and long term health effects is one of the main things keeping me sober. It's very sobering. It's good to train your mind to go there as often as it goes to falsely remembering how much fun drinking was-it counteracts the urges and reinforces that we're in charge of our own health and are making a positive life saving change.
Sorry to those who have lost people close to them because they weren't able to stop. It's heartbreaking that it's fairly common.
Sorry to those who have lost people close to them because they weren't able to stop. It's heartbreaking that it's fairly common.
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: California
Posts: 18
Dr. Drew Celebrity and non celeb rehab show has been really helpful for me to watch when trying to stop drinking. It's good to have that healthy sense of fear that we need sometimes to stop drinking. I also find it helpful to see where they have been with their addiction, how bad it's gotten, and to see them recovery and seem so much healthier mentally and physically. I think it's TLC that makes the show Addiction which is also helpful for me to watch. I agree with the posts where people said it's helpful to remember the bad times so we can let go of the so called "good times" in drinking...a good way to fight off that "voice" in our heads that tries to reason with us why drinking is so "fun."
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