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I don't know if I need help... Am I an alcoholic?

Old 10-25-2012, 09:41 AM
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I don't know if I need help... Am I an alcoholic?

I'm 25, and a stay at home mom. I drink at least 5 beers EVERY day...and I mean EVERY. I can't even remember the last day I didn't drink beer. I don't get drunk though... I only get drunk when I'm out with friends like once a month. I am still full functional, but for some reason, I just need the beer.
On the days my kid goes to daycare (twice a week) I find myself NEEDING a beer by 11am. On the days she is home with me, I usually won't start drinking until late afternoon.

Please don't judge... like I said, I don't get drunk. I usually don't even get a buzz... It's like something in my body just craves a steady flow of alcohol. I don't drink liquor ever...it's only beer.

My beer drinking doesn't interfere with finances, relationships, or anything for that matter... It seems like just a physical dependency. Would this classify as something I need to seek "help" for? Most alcoholics that need treatment are usually people who get wasted and it effects every aspect of their life.... I'm not like that at all, but it's still concerning to me that I cannot go a single day without it.
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Old 10-25-2012, 09:54 AM
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Hi, Wrldhealer. Welcome to SR.

We are not here to judge, but to support and encourage each other, and share experience on recovery. So, you can feel comfortable at SR.

I actually don't know where technically there is a borderline that separates an alcoholic from non-alcoholic. I can tell you from my personal experience that I started to seek help when I realized that I NEED wine to cope with some problems. It did not interfere with my work, my relatives, friends either. But I started to feel dependant on this. I coouldn't just have one glass and say "stop". And from what you are saying it sounds to me like some sort of dependancy (it is strictly my opinion).

You'll find a lot of support and useful information here.

Stick here and keep posting.

Take care.
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Old 10-25-2012, 10:18 AM
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Agreed. Sounds like if you're concerned about it there is probably an issue.. and if not now, it may develop into a problem that does affect you life negatively. Ask yourself this, can you quit for 2 weeks? If not, you might want to nip it in the bud now. Good luck!
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Old 10-25-2012, 10:23 AM
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That is how I started out. I liked to be a little buzzed all the time. At the end it took 750 of vodka/day to get me a little buzzed all the time. Alcoholism is a progressive disease. It only gets worse
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Old 10-25-2012, 11:03 AM
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Alcoholism is the only disease that is self diagnosed.
I've been told; and know from my experience; it is a progressive disease.
Drinking alone is certainly one trait of an alcoholic
I suggest you stay here @ SR.com and read as much and get friends....it will help you regardless.
At your age, a lot can still go on in your life and you may turn to alcohol for help. IT WILL NOT.

Here's how many define the progression simply:

FUN.......fun WITH PROBLEMS......PROBLEMS
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Old 10-25-2012, 11:11 AM
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The progression is one thing I would worry about. I developed quite a large tolerance as time and my consumption increased

If you don't even get buzzed from the beer, then why do it? Its a lot of empty calories. So, I am assuming you do get something out of it. I used to drink a lot more than that on a regular basis but could still get a buzz off one beer early in the day on an empty stomach.

I finally decided to quit when I realized that alcohol was definitely a negative influence in my life (am still not sure how much of one) with little or no benefit to me.

It sounds like you think there is a problem but are worried what it might mean if there is problem.

I am still not sure how much drinking affected different parts of my life. I only know that it hardly ever had a good effect. I am only beginning to see how much drinking may have negatively affected my life now that I have stopped. I saw some of the issues while I was drinking but am seeing more now that I have stopped.

Good luck to you and keep reading and posting on here, it really helped me.
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Old 10-25-2012, 11:13 AM
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If you are questioning whether you are an alcoholic or not, why don't you try stopping drinking for a fixed period, say a month? If you're not an alcoholic, then you should have no problem doing that. You should know there is absolutely no difference in liquor, beer or wine. It's alcohol. And, alcoholism is a progressive disease. It will get worse, unless you stop.
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Old 10-25-2012, 11:13 AM
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We don't judge here... How could we?

Pretty much the same as others... But, let's say you have your daughter with you at home, have a couple to get a nice feeling, then she hurts herself and you have to go to the ER. Would you drive there and be 100% sure you are under the legal limit?

Just some food to tought ;-)

All the best
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Old 10-25-2012, 11:44 AM
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Hi. If the beer is messing up your life, making you feel guilty, etc. it might be best to stop drinking it. That's whatvI did and don't regret it for a minute.
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Old 10-25-2012, 12:08 PM
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Welcome wrldhealer!

I commend you for looking at your drinking. I can relate a lot to what you said. I started drinking more in my early 30's when I had small children - most evenings I would have 3 or 4 beers and noticed that it got harder and harder to go without it. I didn't get drunk often either - I just wanted enough to de-stress.

It really doesn't take much to get into a vicious cycle. Alcohol creates anxiety and depression, and it relieves it, too.

Glad you're here!
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Old 10-25-2012, 12:19 PM
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Glad you are here and glad you posted.

Alcohol didn't devastate any area of my life either. However, it started to concern my wife and I honestly started to get worried about the health effects of it. Was alcohol causing a problem in my life? Yes. Therefore I had an alcohol problem.

I once also had to have a minor medical procedure and the forms asked how much I drank. Having to calculate that and report it was troubling to me. Do you think your doctor may be concerned about 35 beers a week? Might be worth asking him/her.

Wishing you comfort, peace, and all the best with your decision.
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Old 10-25-2012, 12:22 PM
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I rarely would get hammered.
It was more like an IV. Constant drip drip drip of beer.
The problem is, that is exactly how to acclimatize your body to alcohol.
Binge drinking is hard on your system, but I think the constant flow makes you more of a physical addict over time.

If you try and quit for a while, you will know pretty fast what its done to you.

Why not stop for a while?
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Old 10-25-2012, 12:30 PM
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You can type, that's a good sign. When I was 25, I am 43 now, I drank to get drunk. Believe it or not, you may not think you are not hurting your finances or others, but poll the gang and see what they think. You may get a few answers you might not have ever expected.

I like others' suggestions, stop. Get honest and put it down then check back in a few days.
Good luck,
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Old 10-25-2012, 12:55 PM
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Hi and welcome wrldhealer

Like others have said if you think it's a problem then it probably is.

I certainly remember needing, not wanting, a drink, I remember drinking every day, I remember drinking alone, and I remember maintaining a buzz but never getting drunk.

I think it's good you're here and thinking about your drinking now before it gets worse.
You'll find a ton of support here

D
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Old 10-25-2012, 01:03 PM
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You're describing what my mother was like when I was a child. She drank that way for a long, long time. I never saw her drunk as a child, she just drank all day. She may as well have had an IV drip to help her get through the day.

When she tried to quit, she found she could not do it. As a child, I found myself constantly worried about her. I took care of the house as best I could so that she wouldn't have to come home and be stressed out and drink. She drank anyway. I figured it was my fault, I hadn't done a good enough job taking care of the house and making sure everything was perfect and stress free for her. I felt an overwhelming sense of responsibility for her .... so much that I lost myself in the process.

She ended up loosing her marriage, her job, her home, a good relationship with her children, and nearly her life.

I'm happy to say that she is now sober but she didn't get there until she ended up in assisted living in her 50's. She has improved now but she drank herself nearly to death, to the point that she could not feed herself, or bathe herself, or walk ... among other things.

I never saw her drunk until after she announced that she had a problem. I remember when she announced it, I was in my 20s .... I thought, "Wow, really? I knew that when I was 11."
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Old 10-25-2012, 07:03 PM
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I already know that I could not go a day without beer..lol
Even if I was broke or had the kids with me, I would end up scraping up enough change for a 6 pack of Milwaukee's Best...along with the children with me

I have an appt with a therapist in a few days...I'm going to see if I can get a plan going. I don't want to quit drinking forever...I mean, I'm only 25. I don't want to give it up for the rest of my life. I would just like to be able to have a few beers 3 nights a month with friends or something...not feel that I need to drink it every day.
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Old 10-25-2012, 07:07 PM
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I have an appt with a therapist in a few days...I'm going to see if I can get a plan going. I don't want to quit drinking forever...I mean, I'm only 25. I don't want to give it up for the rest of my life. I would just like to be able to have a few beers 3 nights a month with friends or something...not feel that I need to drink it every day.
You might be able to do that. Then again, you might not. You'll find out soon enough.

All of us wished that were the case, but it just wasn't. Maybe you'll be different.
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Old 10-25-2012, 08:39 PM
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It's great you're young and can catch this before it progresses any further. If you're drinking because you need to in the morning that's not a good sign. If you drink while being responsible for a child that can lead to trouble too. Even if it doesn't interfere with your finances the money spent on beer could benefit someone (college fund? family vacation? food pantry donation?) in a tangible away instead of pouring it down the drain.

If you found SR you must have concerns of your own. You'll get lots of help and support here-welcome!
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Old 10-25-2012, 09:42 PM
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Hi and welcome to SR!

I probably have some of the same advice posted already. I work full time and have three children. I am on day 14 without wine. Although nothing horrible happened I often woke up tired, and then had to get through work, and then pick up the kids and manage homework, sports, dinner....

I found that the first thing I was doing when I came home was pouring a glass of wine. The glass led to another,mother a bottle, then a large bottle.

Being a mom is the hardest job in the world. However, being sober for my kids is worth it. I know I slacked on giving them my full attention many nights, and I always managed to justify it.

I hope your appointment goes well, keep reading and posting, SR is a great website!!!
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Old 10-25-2012, 09:54 PM
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Originally Posted by wrldhealer View Post
Most alcoholics that need treatment are usually people who get wasted and it effects every aspect of their life....
And you know this how?
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