trikuza

I was just wondering if some of you guys that got to know each other better ever link up to sponsor each other. Kind of like AA sponsors, but through communication on soberrecovery.com Becauze I think it would help me out if I had someone check up every once in a while to make sure im fighting that good fight.

With that being said, I hit day 18 today and this website has made a huge impact on me. I normally dont join online forums because some of them are so dead, but here I see dozens and dozens of new people joining every day. And they all look up to some of the 5,000 post veterans on here like respected fathers lol.

Coming to this forum has actually become like a new hobby for me. I cant imagine anything more worthwhile than helping people out. You never know when your posts will literally save someones life when they have hit rock bottom and joined this website as a last attempt to salvage themselves.

So Thanks to everyone, seriously!

Natom

I have often thought about someone being sponsored online. I would be willing to do it to someone either in my country or all around the world. With stuff like Skype and Facebook chat I imagine it would actually be very easy. And I am pretty sure I have heard about it being done in prisons and institutions.

trikuza

yeah i wasnt thinking of anything that formal. i just figured, if people are friend requesting each other and private messaging each other, it isnt hard to get each others backs.

sugarbear1

Glad you found us!

Natom

Yeah I know what you mean. Sponsorship, in my opinion, is one of those relationships that needs a degree of formality. It's certainly a very special type of friendship.

Sapling

For me a sponsor was somebody to take me through the steps....That's all I was looking for....Someone that was living in steps 10, 11 and 12. That's what I found. I'm not real close friends with my sponsor....I have many other friends in AA that I hang out with more than my sponsor.

trikuza

thanks sapling ill think about that. maybe finding a week one or two buddy with a similar situation

nobshere

Hey trikuza..I'm not a fan of sponsors in general but I do believe that having someone in your corner is a wonderful idea. SR is perfect for that! Welcome!

trikuza

nobshere, yeah i was saying....i dont need a full on sponsor, just people to say whats up to every once in a while and make sure nobody is straying from the sober path

nobshere

Absolutely trikuza, I hear you!

bbthumper

If we are talking AA sponsorship, I have always recommended that a first sponsor be someone you can work with face to face. There is a gaining of humility and ego deflation that takes place in a sponsor/ sponsee relationship. I know for me, I never would have gotten that in a long distance, internet based relationship. I wouldnt have felt the same level of accountability as I did knowing that I would see my sponsor a couple times a week.

jennikate

I think you mean something more like a pen pal? Or like if you were committing to a 5K and wanted another person who was doing the same to compare notes and be accountable to? Or am I off?

trikuza

Yeah. the thing is, ive been a little more socially anxious because of withdrawing from a little cocaine use in the last few months. And I get really uneasy at AA where i might have to speak...i absolutey HATE public speaking

Sapling

Then just listen....Nobody is going to make you talk....Listen for someone that talks about the solution...The steps. Ask them after a meeting if they'll take you through them as laid out in the book. That will be the only one you have to talk to....Pretty simple.

MIRecovery

If I was your sponsor on-line the first thing I would say is get a real live sponsor and develop a support group of sober real live people. SR is a wonderful place but it can not take the place of one alcoholic talking to another alcoholic face to face.

That said, I believe there is a ton of support on SR. As in AA stick with the winners. People who have 1+ or preferably 5+ years of sobriety are likely doing something right regardless of the path they have choosen to sobriety

bbthumper

I can relate. for sure. I was the type who would avoid public speaking at ALL COSTS. I failed a number of highschool courses because of that.
Sapling is right you dont have to speak at AA meetings. You can just listen. But, if you want what AA promises, it does require stepping out of your comfort zone. Something an alcoholic is not very fond of, I know. Spiritual growth is painful. Its not easy to ask someone to be your sponsor. Its not easy to work the program of action which AA suggests. But, the rewards?
Freedom from alcohol and the desire to drink. A happy, useful, sober life. Healed relationships. A sense of purpose. New friends. Loss of fear, anxiety, depression, boredom. The ability to help others. Peace of mind. The list could go on and on.
It is a leap of faith. A step out of our comfort zone. But once we do it, we ask ourselves "Why did I wait so long?"

Best wishes to you.

freshstart57

Trikuza, I know it happens for sure. The folks that are securely sober here are here for one reason, and that is to help someone avoid the hell that they experienced when they were in active addiction. Reach out to someone, I bet they will be happy to do what they can.

tomsteve

sounds like yer lookin for some poeple who care about your recovery and thats great. me personally i have a handful of friends in recovery that i keep in contact with and they the same. we share in the good times in or lives and when out thinkers get boggled up, we help each other though it and that can involve some honesty and being blunt. we dont want to see any of us get to the point a crowbar is needed to pop our heads out of our asses.
my sponsor, on the other hand, is also a friend, but who has taken me through the steps and taught me what they mean, the principles behind the steps, and how to apply them to my life. i call him, too, when i and boggled up and it all depends ont he situation on when i call him.

trikuza

thanks for replying guys. yeah I dont require someone to ride my ass all the time because I do quite well avoiding temptation when i really put my mind to it, which I have the last few weeks. But itll be cool to have a few friends to say whats up every once in a while.

I'll consider trying real AA, but this site has been doing a solid job helping me get through stuff. It doesnt take long at all to get some personal replies and support.

Anna

I'm glad you're finding lots of support here, and I hope you continue to post and let us know how you're doing.