DisplacedGRITS

so i'm at the point now where sobriety really isn't a chore for me. my habits and my lifestyle support a sober life. my wiring is changing and while i have the occasional crave, it's not something i'm in danger of acting on. so now i find myself in a new phase of my sobriety. actually going out and living. i've been so wrapped up in building my solid foundation in sobriety that i've let it be my entire life. now that it's solid, my life is feeling so empty and i'm feeling lost again. i guess now i'm at the point where i actually have to look at living life again. going out in the world, making friends and doing...things. breaking out of my comfort zone again. i'm looking into a gym to get myself out of the house during the day. i've become ensconced in my house, sleeping a lot. it's not unlike when i was drinking but now i'm sober. i've been doing so well on the outside but i've noticed a frustration building in me that i haven't been able to put my finger on and i think this is it. i'll admit i'm scared but aren't we all when we take the first steps into the unknown? what good is sobriety if i'm still living apart from the world? it's still a great feeling but i can't hide in here all day and live my life behind closed doors and in front of a computer screen. it's really hard but i'm going to try to take those steps outside. try to make friends that aren't part of that safe society of the sober life. my sobriety will always be the most important part of my lifestyle but it's not the only thing in life. it's time to get out there and start doing. it's just really scary taking those first steps.

Delilah1

I think joining a gym is a great idea. I keep trying to find a health-spa-zen weekend, but they are really expensive!! Have you thought a out joining a walking group to train for an event? Might be a good way to meet new people.

DisplacedGRITS

i haven't thought of that, Delilah. might not be too many of those going around since winter is just around the corner. i am thinking about joining some of the fitness classes that a gym offers though. i want to be in a class with people. i really am a social person. i just have to figure out how to break into a group.

DisplacedGRITS

well, i did it. i joined the gym today and got the tour. even did some weight training exercises in my nice clothes with my tour guide, Stan. i really like the place. i have a free training session tomorrow morning and i'm looking forward to that too. i've been staying up late and sleeping in late so it's good that i've got something to get up and get out of bed for. i'm nervous that i have a commitment to fulfill. that was something i was horrible at when i was drinking, of course. i'm still a little nervous about it now even though i'm sober. but i'm striking out now and trying to adopt a full body healthy lifestyle. and that's going to include a social life too so hopefully i can get in some classes there and maybe meet some people. we shall see. only good can come of this so i'll go in there tomorrow with a happy heart full of hope and armpits full of deodorant.

quitforme79

Sounds like you are really taking charge and being proactive. I think it's wonderful that you are branching out even if it's anxiety producing. You have offered great advice to me on here and I just know that you will be feeling better soon..keep up with the positive thinking

Delilah1

Good for you!!! We can sweat ourselves back into a healthy lifestyle together! I am spoiled with warm weather year round, but I spent my first 27 years in NY so I have not forgotten the cold winter months!

lilgolden73

Good for you! I think the Gym helps alot!

DisplacedGRITS

i went back today too! i said i was going to give myself the weekends off but i figured i might as well. my arms are sore from yesterday and i'm sure my legs will be sore from today but doing this is giving me another sense of purpose in my life. i keep house, shop, do dinner, hit the gym and practice sobriety. after the holidays i'll job hunt and add that to part of my life.

i was stuck in my house for a long time. i was getting listless and feeling like a recluse. so i had to step out of my comfort zone again and i'm already feeling the rewards. sobriety is what you make of it. you can isolate or you can put yourself out there. you may have to risk being uncomfortable and nervous in the world again but that's the way it is. just get out there, live the life you want to live and work that sobriety! it's yours after all.