escapist

I drink every single day. I am in the middle of my second day of not drinking. If you asked me who I am all I could say would be " not drinking" . I had about 5 years sobriety and truly enjoyed it. Life threw me some difficulties , I got depressed, felt trapped and here I am again. I am afraid that life will still be miserable if I can get sober. My coping skils are non-existant.

Dee74

Hi escapist

I'm sorry you're struggling

I wonder tho...when you were sober did you do anything besides just not drinking?
To stay sober I needed to do more than abstinence.

I really had to learn some life skills, ways to deal with trouble sober - I knew if my only solution to those really tough problems would be to drink, I'd eventually be in trouble.

I not only learned how to deal with things but I've made a life sober that I love...I think that has a huge impact on lasting success.

Support really helped me - and the good news is you'll find a lot of that here...and a few ideas too

Welcome

D

escapist

Thanks for the welcome. The last time I was sober I did lots of positive things. The only thing I did not do was learn how to set boundries , how to deal with disappointment, especially disappointment from others. I can't fix myself. I threw away my sobriety trying to please people who are unpleaseable. I don't know if thats a word or not. I feel like a real idiot. I am in bad shape. This time around I am the worst I have ever been. I am 51. My abdomen is very swollen, my face is swollen and I can't cope with anyone . I am a drunk. I feel hopeless

Impurrfect

((escapist)) - Welcome to SR! I can only tell you my experience, but I became an A (addict) because I was a codependent. I wanted to fix people, make things all better and when I couldn't? I turned to alcohol, then opiates, and finally crack.

I came here as an A but I found another home in the Friends & Family forums. Quite honestly, I "fit" in a lot of areas here on SR. I hope you read around, keep posting. This site has been a huge part of my recovery.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

Itchy

Naaah,
You just feel hopeless. I did not quit until I was 58 and thought the same. Dee said a mouthful there. I did a 7 day in hospital detox, used my Docs, and AA as well as here and one on one and group counseling until I got on my feet. Glad you know you need to learn coping skills. Do you AA? I only used AA for the first three months but would use them again if I had to do it again. (which I will not thank you very much.) What can I do to help? Lots of us codies here as Amy mentioned. We can get by, with a little help from our friends.

MIRecovery

I was where you are. At 52 my body just gave out. My first step was a doctor, then formal out patient treatment, then AA. I was one sick puppy, physically, mentally, and spiritually.

I am honestly happy and healthy today so if I can do it I know you can to. Being hopeless and drunk is an ending point. Make a step towards life. Make a doctors appointment with someone experienced in addiction.

It may look hopeless now but it is not. You can get better if you are willing to take that first step.

Obladi

Hey, escapist, I'm 50. I have felt the same desperation about my inability to deal with people in a way that works for everyone. One of the things I've come to understand very recently is that just because I'm not like everyone else does not mean there's something wrong with me. Perhaps there is no "fixing" us, maybe the fix is in simply understanding ourselves as fallible people who have the capacity to learn and grow. I'm certain you are not an idiot. You're here, right? Brilliant move on your part!

I'm glad you're here and hope to see you around.

Obladi

p.s. Good on you for making it into Day Two. Keep going - it gets better.