zimmy

I went sober for 5 days last week. Had 3 pints of beer Friday and Saturday and then nothing yesterday. Plan to do the same this week. I'm thinking this is going to work well. I like waking up without a hangover and enjoy a few drinks on Friday and Saturday.

Kind of like celebrating sobriety by drinking a few.

Sasha4

I think that your post is disrespectful to the members here who have either lost loved ones to addiction or have lost everything themselves, hit rock bottom and are trying their hardest to recover.

In my opinion, it's complete rubbish to celebrate sobriety by drinking a few beers....

but thats me, not sure what others will think.

coming_clean

Dear Zimmy.

It's great that your plan is working out so far.
Just one question pops to my mind.
Is posting about succesful moderation on a AA/NA forum really succesfull 'normal' moderation??

For me as an addict. It has always been all or nothing.
I succeeded in tricking myself every once in a while.
And then my disease progressed again a little further.

I hope you will be able to keep this up.

doggonecarl

Your initial post was entitled, Am I an Alcoholic?

If the answer to that question is no, then you will be able to moderate.

If not, and your problem progresses, I hope you are able to find you way back to recovery.

Many don't.

zimmy

Disrespectful? WTF? I've been drinking almost every day for the last 3 years and am now trying to go back to moderate drinking. How is that disrespectful to others? We are all trying to control our addiction. I'm trying moderation. Maybe it works and maybe it doesn't.

EternalQ

Zimmy,

Are you looking for feedback? If you are, surely you must know that encouraging moderation on a Sober Recovery website is not going to go over very well or receive much positive feedback? Although you will recieve some, don't be surprised it is mixed.

There are actually websites that support moderation, and if you google it you will find them. If you are looking for like minds you will find more there.

I am sure you know most members here, have come to the conclusion that no alcohol is best for them. I know you don't want to discourage the progress we have made.

I know I should only speak for myself. Moderation for me would eventually ruin my life. So it is hard for me to read about moderation. But of course, I have the choice to not read it. But it is hard, when I log on looking for support, to read this instead. Doesn't help.

Just sayin....

Weasel1966

Zimmy... Don't go anywhere from SR. I see you are new and don't want this post and responses to drive you away.

You should read a bit about how others have tried you path. I do not imply you are the same. But if you can moderate then you are the exception. And a very very big exception.

Continue to share with us as you go through this experiment. I would like to follow what you think of things.

Ken

zimmy

Thank you. How can I read about others who have tried moderation? I'm not sure why my post is offensive to others. I had a successful week of moderation and am giving it a try. This is a major reduction in alcohol for me.

dogmamma

I tried moderation for years. And sometimes it would work. And then something bad would happen. Or something good would happen. And I'd drink too much, spiraling into a cycle of drinking and shame and then drinking again. After 12 years, it has cost me so much and left me further out of control than ever. I had to accept that I cannot drink like other people. I wanted that not to be true, but it is.

EternalQ

Ok, Zimmy, Weasel is right.
I will recuse myself. Best wishes to you.

Weasel1966

Zimmy... My point was not so much to read about moderation. This site is about not drinking at all.

Your post in and of itself is not offensive. It's that people here have been through a lot. Myself included. To share that you want to control the uncontrollable is not comforting to say the least.

Moderation is a funny thing. You never know till it's too late if it worked.

We care about you. So....

HitRockBottom70

Can you not see the problem with this? I ask this with respect and care.

There have been others who have tried to go down this path on this site. It is rocky and you will most certainly upset people by posting it here. I will just stay away if it affects me negatively. This is about you and your journey. If you are up for it, I think having a place where you hold yourself accountable to a set of rules you make could be very helpful. Make your rules and if you break them or start moving the line, you will know you have a problem and need to quit. Most of us have been down this path and found out moderation is not possible for us. I would doubt it is for you also, since you are posting here, but I don't have a crystal ball... If you decide to quit, you will get nothing but support from everyone on this site.

Good luck Zimmy

Misguided

Funny...I'm currently reading a book "Addiction and Grace," and the author mentions specifically during one of the phases of addiction how addicts "celebrate sobriety by drinking a few" then fall right back in to the addiction.

This may or may not be you, but I don't think you will find many positive praises from people who have tried so hard to put the bottle down and not pick it up again. Sobriety isn't a walk in the park for addicts.

Fandy

welcome to SR Zimmy, I'm glad you are feeling well...and have noticed that it is from lack of booze in your body every night.

I don't find your posting offensive at all, but it's a bit slippery on the slope and very easy (for me) to fall back into the pit...because I can't stop once i start. I'm glad you can and posting, holding yourself accountable is good.

congrats on having a happy week.

dSober

Moderation didn't work for me zimmy. If you're alcohilc it won't work for you. But you are mose certainly welcome here.

Everyone is welcome here. ALL, except flamers. I've only been here a few days but I've already seen posts removed and a thread terminated by the moderators for this.

EVERYONE here is hurting, or they wouldn't be here. Addiction is a painful subject.

Auvers

Moderation did not work consistently enough to work for me. I am glad for that because I know my idea of moderate did not fit with the medical definition of moderate, so I would have still been drinking to the point of harming my health. Only after getting totally away from drink for 3 months did I begin to realize the extent of harmful effects it was having on me. I would encourage anyone who has an issue at all with drink to quit at least 3 months to give your body and brain the chance to recover somewhat from the effects and see what you think at that point. One thing that happened to me in that interval is I went from thinking life would not be as enjoyable without alcohol, to knowing it was loads better without it.

HitRockBottom70

Zimmy,
Here is one that tried. Many posts had to be deleted by moderators. If you look at posts from this member is will give you an idea. Please realize when you are early on in sobriety, emotions run very hot. This goes for ourselves and others.

Just wanted to answer how you can read about one other I knew who tried moderation on this site.

Paul, I am hoping you are well.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post3451020

notsleeping

If moderation worked i would not be here.

hypochondriac

I think it's great that you are controlling your drinking Zimmy but what you are doing is the holy grail for most alcoholics. Most of us have tried and failed at what you're doing. So yeah, it is probably gonna trigger some of us on here. It did me a bit. What you're doing has nothing to do with sobriety. Most of us here are not trying to control our addiction, that's kind of the point of being sober. I'm sure you will be fine with what you're doing though. Loads of people control their drinking every day. They must do otherwise everyone'd be an alcoholic. Good luck to you x

justhadenough

welcome to SR Zimmy.

Someone said if you have to try and control your drinking then you are already out of control.Normal people/normal drinkers/people who don't have a drink problem don't have to think about controlling/moderating etc.