Kza

I know and fully accept that alkies have to learn to live without drinking. But for emits like trying to fill an empty void with meaningless activities. tomorrow I am ging to tidy up, go for a very long walk and I have a Skype interview for a job. That takes care of say five hours if I throw in having coffee and something to eat. Drinking has always been great for me as a way of passing tome easily. Now without it I am here in bed at 8.30 pm and desperately hoping to sleep well but know I will be up at 4 or 5 am.

artsoul

How long have you been sober? I know that, for me, it took a while to get motivated and interested in things again. I went through a period of boredom, wondering if I'd ever be happy (and what was happiness anyway?). I just kept going, though, because I knew I didn't want to go back to the way I was living.

It really, really, really does get better. It's just words right now, I know. But I don't think there would be so many here saying that if it weren't true (we always think we'll be the exception to the rule, of course!)

Just give it time and be patient with yourself, OK?

Anna

There are so many things you can do with your free time.

Have you considered volunteering in your community? There are lots of organizations that need help and it would give you a meaningful way to spend some time.

DarkDays

Staring at a wall doing nothing is a million times better than drinking to past the time, at least you have clear thoughts and clarity.

Give yourself 6 months sober, see how you feel.

Kza

As I drank till 4 am or so, tomorrow will be day 1. I am trying to find a job at the moment and hope to be working very soon. I know things will get better if I don't drink but the boredom is awful.

justhadenough

I once read a post on here-50 things to do to stop you being bored when sober-or something. I'm sure someone else will remember it and know where it is? I'd quite liketo read it again too

Kza

I realise this but it's getting through everything to get there.

Kza

I remember being annoyed with that post as I felt its just time filling.

DarkDays

Boredom ? Real sorry but this is nothing more than your addiction talking, you have to give yourself enough time away from it to realise it.

Good luck, give yourself a 100 days at least to see how you feel.

Hexipuff

When newly sober time seems to slow down and drag.

I sat down each morning and made a list of things I needed to do each day - this included chores, exercise, reading, time on SR.
Each time I felt time dragging I found something, anything to do. I never went to bed at an early time. Evenings can drag but a long soak in the bath, a hot drink or herbal tea, reading and posting and chatting on SR all hours of the day kept me up until I felt ready for bed. The exercise and fresh air gave me a more natural sleep. I stuck to this plan until my sleep patterns adjusted

I also find that evening AA meetings worked for me too.

Kza

Normal people enjoy themselves but I don't. I wonder if I have some kind of anhedonia or whatever its called.

misterritter

Hi Kza

I know what you mean. Filling in dead time was what I did with drinking a lot of the time. I am very early in this, this is day 11. What I have been doing is all of those things I have been neglecting. Fixing stuff around the house, cleaning, reading, trying to take better care of myself physically. For me, seeing improvements in me and my surroundings has been a bright spot.

There have been plenty of times where I feel like doing nothing and through reading plenty of posts on here, I see that may be a part of the initial process of physical and mental healing from all that I put myself through.

I have also been spending alot of time reading and posting on SR, probably too much .

Good luck to you.

FreeFall

If it were exciting and fulfilling to you to drink your days away you probably wouldn't be on SR at all. There are people out there that are sick that would beg for one normal day to do any of the things you feel are just time fillers. It's all in how you look at it I guess. Instead of talking about how bored you are go out and do something to change your patterns and maybe you'll find something to be interested in. Your new job will fill some of the time if you get it (which may be hard to get and keep if you're drinking).

If being sober is that boring and awful for you, maybe you're just not ready to quit drinking yet. It is a lifestyle change and it takes a big commitment to make it happen. It's not going to work if you don't want to stop. If you're not able to find any happiness while drinking or sober maybe you need to talk to a counselor to sort it all out. Good luck!

Kza

Thanks, it is just the sheer stupidity and waste that I have put myself through. I can't believe the mess I have got myself into.

artsoul

I didn't realize you were on day 1..... You're probably going through some rebound anxiety/restlessness (hangover, withdrawal, whatever you want to call it). Suggestions like "read a book" or "go skiing" aren't what you need right now. You just need to get through the rest of the day sober.

I got through the first days by gluing myself to this forum and watching TV (at the same time). Anything to help distract me....

Just keep it simple and be good to yourself. Eating helps with the cravings, too. Hang in there.

Bgh2002

Everyday sober helps to clean up that mess!

Kza

therein lies the contradiction when drinking. I know there are so many people worse off and I am wrapped up in my own selfish misery.

Dee74

When I look back at my drinking days, I did nothing...I basically watched TV.
That life is going to feel a little empty once we sober up.

I needed to find new things to do with my life.

No need for the activities to be meaningless tho - you can make them as meaningful as you like Kza - after all, what you do is completely up to you

D

Kza

Yes, I can afford to go on holiday anywhere in the world bit it's useless as I won't enjoy myself. On holidays I stay in and drink or go to bars.

hypochondriac

For the first week or so I just went to bed when I got in from work because I didn't know what to do with myself. Then I would do things which I knew wasted time, like read magazines and go for walks, just to distract myself. But actually going for walks really cleared my head and helped me figure out what I should be doing. Now I refuse to do meaningless things. I did enough when I was drinking. And it's amazing what ends up on the meaningless list, and it's all stuff I would do to fill the time while I was drinking! Things will turn around if you stay sober Kza. Maybe this is what AA meetings are good for... keeps you busy, gets you out of your own head, and certainly can't be classed as meaningless...

Plus, if you're not working it's only natural to be depressed, and with the booze on top of that! I remember a bad drinking time of mine when I wasn't working and it was vile. I have never been in a darker place. Getting structure back in my life probably saved it. Maybe having meetings be your structure would help x