whatsgoingon

Hi guys,

Been a while since I've been on. Well as of last Thursday I'm 1 month sober! Yeah go me!

Next weekend I've got a problem. My sister in law and her husband and kids are coming to visit and staying for a few days. It would obviously normal on such occasions to have a few drinks. I don't want to tell them of my problems, I'm a very private person and its none if theirs or anyone's business.

So I need some good excuses why I'm not drinking?

My life has gone full circle, in the past I'd be worried about how I would be able to sneek my next drink now I'm more afraid about how I'm going to avoid my next drink!

justhadenough

congrats on 1 month!

You could say you're taking a break for health reasons.It's not a lie .you may find they won't be as bothered as you think.we think it's a big deal because we have a problem-most people don't think twice about it.have a nice weekend

ladybug77

congrats on the 1 month

yes, you can say you are not drinking for health reasons and it not be a lie, I ran into the same issue not long after I quit drinking when my dad and sister came to visit me.

they immediately wanted to know what my health issues were...........it was easier to finally just say I am an alcoholic. They were actually relieved to hear the truth as my grandfather died of liver disease.

Also, my dad actually asked me if he could bring his beer into my house and asked if I would be okay if he drank when we went out to eat. Everyone deals in their own way and you will find what works best for you.

Private person or not, sometimes it's just best to go with the truth. Also, would you be able to not drink if they were drinking in front of you?

whatsgoingon

Some people are happy to 'come out' and some thrive at group sessions such as aa. I'm not like that. I guess one day ill probably have to answer a few questions and maybe disclose to a chosen few that I've had a change of lifestyle but its not something I want to broadcast. There other thing is by telling people is that it creates unwanted pressure that would lead to stress which is the main reason I drank too much in the first place! Eventually I will tell people but only those I want to and only when I'm confident enough that I got some control back in my life.

My sister in law is the last person I'd tell anyway! She is patronising and opinionated and those are her good points!

It's a difficult place to be when you have decided to go sober and the rest if the world still think and expect you to be the person they are used to are in some cases I think a lot people probably liked the lively **** head I used to be. A mate of mine had a really addictive personality. What ever he did he gave it 100% commitment! He had a drink and coke problem. One day I noticed he was not drinking. We all tried in vain to break his resistance but he just said I alright guys I just not drinking tonight. He never broadcasted his lifestyle change, he just got on with it and changed his addiction from drugs and booze to exercising and reading! If he can do it then so can I. The guy was an animal, always on something. The turnaround in his life and has been an inspiration to me and he's kind of my blueprint. No fuss, just get on with it and don't give a **** what anyone else thinks or feels they need to know.

instant

I discovered that other people are generally less interested in my drinking habits than I am/was. There is always the odd rude person however. "the health kick" held me in good stead until I was ready to say "no thanks" (no explanation needed).

It's tough one - but we all go through it

Fandy

This was very true for me too.
Offer to share you choice of non alcoholic beverages, you might be surprised!