swesti

Hi every-one. I'm a mom of two gorgeous teenagers and was happily for 17 years. I'm still married but I started binge drinking about 3 years ago and I reached rock bottom 12 days ago. I tried to go fetch my kids and I was completely not able to drive. The fall-out has been unbelievably bad and my husband wanted to put me in rehab. Lucky the pschologist we went to see supported my decision to try get sober at home- I really wanted to try rebuild reltionships as soon as possible. Subesequently the therapist also referred me to a pschiatrist who would be able to see to me medically. He hs encouraged me to go the outpatient route as he feels I need the extra support- I am still waiting for the clinic to call me back. The problem/problems I'm facing often seem insurmmountable and I feel a bit shut off from everything. My children have been amazing- they are scared, unsure and obviously don't trust me but the have incredibly closed the "gap" and are talking to me and showing me lots of affection. The problem for me is my husband as he is SO angry with me he only talks to me when the kids are near. On advise from the therapist he removed all the alcohol from the house, even though I told him it wasn't necessary. I haven't had a single craving since my "breakdown". The difficulty is that he has come home every night having had quite a lot to drink and now we are away he has had almost two bottles of wine per night. The alcohol is not bothering me its the lack of consideration and support. I cannot talk to my children about this and he has shut me out completely and is almost flaunting the alcohol. I'm so lonely, and confused - I just don't know how to move on from this

Jeni26

That does sound tough, my thoughts are with you xx
Well done on making the decision to quit. Your sobriety must become your number 1 priority. Building/mending relationships won't happen unless you do. Great that the kids are on board, children are amazing and mine too seemed to forgive almost immediately, I think they were just happy to have their mum back!
As for your H... I'm only speaking from personal experience here, but when I quit initially, my H's drinking got worse. He rebelled against my sobriety. Although he loves me, he wasn't prepared to face the change in our relationship and it made him question his own drinking. Eventually he was forced to admit he has issues of his own and he quit too. But not after our marriage went through a very difficult few months.
I'm not saying that your H has a drink problem, although 2 bottles of wine per night does not sound good....
I think for the moment, the whole focus needs to be on you, and feeling guilty about how he's feeling wont help you. You are not responsible for that. You must do everything in your power to stay sober, with or without his support.
Stay close to us in SR. Read what has worked for other people who are a long time sober. Stay committed. You are worth this. You deserve to be sober xxx

MythOfSisyphus

I am not very experienced with this, but hang in there! Things will get better. Trust in your family and do what it takes to get clean. Wanting it is 95% of the battle.