New to this Site
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Everett WA
Posts: 24
New to this Site
I'm now to this site and not sure where to start. I have been struggling to kick my alcohol addicition for the past 18 months and have had 70 or so days of sobriety a couple of times only to go back and drink again.
I went to an outpatient treatment in 2011 and that helped, and AA was okay I just didn't feel like I belonged. I feel so alone right now and don't know where to turn for anything anymore. I know drinking doesn't help, but I can't seem to stop.
I thought this might be a good place to try and reach out.
I went to an outpatient treatment in 2011 and that helped, and AA was okay I just didn't feel like I belonged. I feel so alone right now and don't know where to turn for anything anymore. I know drinking doesn't help, but I can't seem to stop.
I thought this might be a good place to try and reach out.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,760
Welcome to the family! 
I'd suggest you see your doctor and tell them you're trying to quit drinking. Meds are often given for a short time to make the withdrawal safe and more comfortable. Then after you're detoxed, get some support system in place, whether it's AA or another program, counseling, group therapy, or outpatient treatment.
I have found great support and advice here.
I'm sure you will too.
I'd suggest you see your doctor and tell them you're trying to quit drinking. Meds are often given for a short time to make the withdrawal safe and more comfortable. Then after you're detoxed, get some support system in place, whether it's AA or another program, counseling, group therapy, or outpatient treatment. I have found great support and advice here.
I'm sure you will too.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,476
Welcome!
I do understand how you feel. I never felt as lost and alone as I did when I was trying to stop drinking.
There is a great community here for support and you will find different recovery programs. Please believe that you can do this!
I do understand how you feel. I never felt as lost and alone as I did when I was trying to stop drinking.
There is a great community here for support and you will find different recovery programs. Please believe that you can do this!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Everett WA
Posts: 24
Thanks for the advice on detoxing. I have a doctors appointment next week actually and I will consider bringing up the fact that I want to quit drinking.
Honestly the hardest part from me is feeling so guilty and ashamed about being an alcoholic. I feel like I have this terrible secret because no one besides my husband, my sister, and my kids know that I'm truly struggling and I don't want to just run around and tell everyone "Hey I drink too much!" I have friends, but no one that I'm really truly honest and myself around. I'm always guarded to some degree.
I guess when it comes down to it that is why I drink, to hide from myself and others because being honest hurts like hell.
I know I have some stuff to face too and my way of coping with stress, hurt, anxiety etc. was/is to drink and facing that stuff sober scares me becuase I know that will trigger me to drink.
Honestly the hardest part from me is feeling so guilty and ashamed about being an alcoholic. I feel like I have this terrible secret because no one besides my husband, my sister, and my kids know that I'm truly struggling and I don't want to just run around and tell everyone "Hey I drink too much!" I have friends, but no one that I'm really truly honest and myself around. I'm always guarded to some degree.
I guess when it comes down to it that is why I drink, to hide from myself and others because being honest hurts like hell.
I know I have some stuff to face too and my way of coping with stress, hurt, anxiety etc. was/is to drink and facing that stuff sober scares me becuase I know that will trigger me to drink.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,476
I was also very ashamed that I had become an alcoholic, and like you, no one outside of my immediate family knew what was going on. I was a military wife, so friends would come and go like the changing winds and it was not something I talked about. Try to remember that alcoholism is a disease, not a character defect. Two things helped me in the early days. I got into an amazing volunteer position which truly changed my life. And, when I looked around, I realized that everybody has an issue of some sort. Mine is alcoholism. It doesn't define me.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Everett WA
Posts: 24
Thanks that helps to know that I'm not the only one who has experienced this feeling of being isolated and ashamed. I struggle with alcoholism as a disease thing, but at the same time it makes sense to me. Thanks for reminding me that this doesn't have to define me.
Any suggestions on where to go for face to face help?
Any suggestions on where to go for face to face help?
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
Welcome, elmwoodcreek, to SR, congratulations to you on your first post, and making the decision to get on with this sobriety thing.
Yes, you can make your last cocktail your last drink, you really can quit drinking. And there are quite a few alternatives to AA. SR has a forum called Secular Connections which is devoted to alternatives to AA and other 12 Step programs. You might find what you are looking for there. If you post there, you will receive lots of support, just like at any other SR forum.
I was sober for a few weeks, working my way through and coming to terms, when I found SR, and first learned about AVRT. I was astonished to learn that AVRT was what I had been doing from the beginning! It is a mental technique that is the collected experience of people who quit drinking without a formal program, so I guess it should have been no surprise that I 'discovered it' on my own too.
Whichever program you choose, you will need to make that commitment to stop drinking. Period. That is the way it has to be. Believe you can do this, then do it. Keep posting, OK?
Yes, you can make your last cocktail your last drink, you really can quit drinking. And there are quite a few alternatives to AA. SR has a forum called Secular Connections which is devoted to alternatives to AA and other 12 Step programs. You might find what you are looking for there. If you post there, you will receive lots of support, just like at any other SR forum.
I was sober for a few weeks, working my way through and coming to terms, when I found SR, and first learned about AVRT. I was astonished to learn that AVRT was what I had been doing from the beginning! It is a mental technique that is the collected experience of people who quit drinking without a formal program, so I guess it should have been no surprise that I 'discovered it' on my own too.
Whichever program you choose, you will need to make that commitment to stop drinking. Period. That is the way it has to be. Believe you can do this, then do it. Keep posting, OK?
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