Pondlady

Welcome Sugar!
I liked your comments about wine drinkers thinking they are more civilized. I fooled myself that way....with lovely goblets and lighting candles.....a hang over is a hangover!!!! Stopped completely 12 weeks ago.....NEVER going back!

I've not been in the UK before, although, it tops my list for travel. It does seem to have a strong drinking culture......I think the US does too. Wine is EVERYWHERE!!!

Anyway.....welcome! I'll look for your posts and be sending you positive energy

sobertime1

i can so relate to your story. Its hard when others drink around you and that we can't stop after one i am in that boat. what really helped me was getting on antabuse its not a cure all but it is a step in the right direction for some of us. I will take one if i know i will be around a lot people who drink you don't have a choice you can't drink. It really helps break that cycle. I wish you luck

Sugarfix

I am also guilty of this!! Not egging them on, but of writing similar status'. Not anymore! I have also lost count of the times I have tried to do 30 days alcohol free.

I have a problem. I know it. And I need to overcome it

Yes! Nice candles, cosy evenings in, Wine and a movie, Wine and dinner.. Wine and friends... and then just WINE!

A hangover is indeed a hangover, no matter what the drink of choice is. Similar to Cocaine addicts being disgusted at heroin addicts.. etc etc... we're all addicts at the end of the day. It's just a different choice of drug!

Funnily enough, in the Meditteranean countries.. they have lots of Wine but not so many alcoholics?! Britain is freezing and alchol is expensive (definitely since our last government budget anyways! Used to be able to get 3 bottles of Wine for £10! Not anymore! Alcohol shot right up in price)

Thanks for the welcome and well done on 12 weeks! I just weighed myself and my BMI has gone up in a month! Though I have been drinking lots of cans of beer since my friend moved in about 6 weeks ago!

RevivingOphelia

I know exactly what you mean. There is no moderation for me and really never has been. I know what I want to feel (or NOT feel as the case may be) and 1-3 drinks (or even 4 or 5) is not going to do the trick.

Also, one of the scarier things for me that made me question my relationship to alcohol was both the increasing amounts that I needed to achieve the buzz I wanted AND the increasing frequency of blackouts. Also, I cannot take the racing heart-through the roof anxiety that I feel the next day.

I am 42 and wish I would have questioned my drinking habits sooner. That's awesome that you have chosen the sobriety route, and I wish you all the best in sticking to it!

RevivingOphelia

I always wondered about this--is it true and, if so, WHY is this the case over there?

Sugarfix

The blackouts have been freaking me out for quite some time! How can you not remember several hours?! And when I am told what I have done I am shocked! Completely out of character!

The anxiety the next day for me is horrific, the racing heart, the racing thoughts, the nervousness.. the horrible 'dooom' you get! Hell on earth!

Well it doesn't matter what age we get there, its that we do that counts !

Sugarfix

Yeah there was a chart done somewhere about the alcoholic countries. Will try and find it!

They start drinking young and respect it, lots of meal time drinking... and lots of healthy good foods! They live longer too!

BBC NEWS | UK | Attitudes to alcohol in Europe

That gives a few of the EU countries. Spain seems absolutely fine!

RevivingOphelia

I don't think this attitude is completely similar to Canada (especially for older folks). In Canada, after a certain age, it's a unseemly to get trashed and most are ashamed and do it in secret (after having a few with friends).

However, when I worked in Australia for a year--OMG--EVERYTHING was about drinking--no one had shame about it and the goal was to get plastered for everyone of all ages. I can't believe the difference in attitudes toward drinking b/w Canada and Australia. So many heavy drinkers (or alcoholics) that I worked with and, yeah, to NOT drink was the anomaly.

RevivingOphelia

I usually drink alone, but I would phone people--ugh. An ex. A sister to vent about my resentments. Wake up and not remember. So effed up.

Yeah, I am ON anti-anxiety meds--don't think they were doing much help with the drinking to excess two to three times a week.

I'm actually trying acupuncture for fifteen sessions to help with anxiety. The doctor is also putting needles on places that help with addiction and detoxification (ears), so maybe that will help. I am glad I was completely honest with her, so she knows it is drinking and anxiety I am fighting.

Anyway, waking up today without a hangover is so good--always is.

Sugarfix

Me too! And not remember! Ruined an amazing good relationship due to me being a drunken @rsehole

He got out early on and good on him !!

Camomile tea, meditation, breathing, distraction, walking even when you dont want to... all helps.

I dont take medicine for anxiety because I know its not disappearing due to the alcohol, and its only the alcohol that causes it!

My auntie got acupuncture done in her ear, she had a 'thing' put in her, she said smaller than a grain of rice and she did stop the alcohol for quite some time

Martin1

It's because alcohol has a novelty factor in the UK, combined with the fact pretty much every social event is centred around alcohol. Abroad children seem to be brought up to respect alcohol, glass of wine with meals etc. It's not treated like the holy grail of beverages like it is here and for "grown ups". I know if I didn't think of alcohol as cool or forbidden and be so enquisitive about it I'd have never started drinking regularly, when I was about 12.

Once you tell a child not to do something, they want to do it. That's what I think puts the idea of alcohol being so special in their heads. I wanted to drink beer for ages before I eventually did, but only because of the fact it was kept from me and it seemed attractive. The way people treat it after that (the idea that getting drunk every weekend is good kinda thing) keeps them drinking once they've started.