8 days clean
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Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: wherever my feet take me
Posts: 1,314
8 days clean
8 days doesnt sound like a lot but aside from rehab and being locked up where I couldnt drink, I have never been able to say that before in 34 years. I did it for me cause I wanted to not because I had to!
I am glad I spent 22 days locked up and then cracked my head open in less than 24 hours of release. It was the best thing that could have happened to me. Although my eyes were swollen shut my eyes were finally wide open for the first time for me to see what the drinking was doing to me.
I forgave gf for having me locked up. I had 2 choices forgive or not forgive. If I had chosen the path of unforgiveness I would have ended up in a state of anger, resentment, and frustration. I would have probably kept trying to bug her and argue... why did you do that, why did you say that, how could you do this to me, I thought you loved me. I also would have ended up wallowing in a pity pot obsessing over everything I lost. my job, my apartment and my g/f. I would have kept drinking probably quite aggresively. By forgiving her it gave me the freedom to move forward to stop making excuses for my own behavior and poor decisions and be able to say:
I HAVENT HAD A DRINK IN EIGHT DAYS
I spoke to my boss and told him ive been clean and I have a plan to stay that way, he told me he couldnt hire me back and I was very dissapointed but I didnt drink which would be normal response. The next day while I was at the clinic which told me they couldnt help me by the way (after 6 hours of traveling on buses and 7$ later) they told me they couldnt help cause I wasnt crazy and to go to AA. Anyway while I was there he called and told me he would hire me back but I am on probation for 90 days. I celebrated with cranberry juice and a splash of 7up.
I am glad I spent 22 days locked up and then cracked my head open in less than 24 hours of release. It was the best thing that could have happened to me. Although my eyes were swollen shut my eyes were finally wide open for the first time for me to see what the drinking was doing to me.
I forgave gf for having me locked up. I had 2 choices forgive or not forgive. If I had chosen the path of unforgiveness I would have ended up in a state of anger, resentment, and frustration. I would have probably kept trying to bug her and argue... why did you do that, why did you say that, how could you do this to me, I thought you loved me. I also would have ended up wallowing in a pity pot obsessing over everything I lost. my job, my apartment and my g/f. I would have kept drinking probably quite aggresively. By forgiving her it gave me the freedom to move forward to stop making excuses for my own behavior and poor decisions and be able to say:
I HAVENT HAD A DRINK IN EIGHT DAYS
I spoke to my boss and told him ive been clean and I have a plan to stay that way, he told me he couldnt hire me back and I was very dissapointed but I didnt drink which would be normal response. The next day while I was at the clinic which told me they couldnt help me by the way (after 6 hours of traveling on buses and 7$ later) they told me they couldnt help cause I wasnt crazy and to go to AA. Anyway while I was there he called and told me he would hire me back but I am on probation for 90 days. I celebrated with cranberry juice and a splash of 7up.
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Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: wherever my feet take me
Posts: 1,314
Meetings, get a sponsor, counseling, and Follow people places and things rule. Thats what I got so far. Im having problems with ex cause we have to talk all my stuff is at our I mean her apt.. I came this morning, woke up early and walked over got here around 8. She had been up all night and she was hammered. I made her something to eat and put her to bed, but she has to be at work at 6 and I doubt she will wake up sober. I am very worried about her, but wont let it interfere with what I am trying to do. This whole situation is very upsetting
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
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Originally Posted by Change4life 
Meetings, get a sponsor, counseling, and Follow people places and things rule. Thats what I got so far. Im having problems with ex cause we have to talk all my stuff is at our I mean her apt.. I came this morning, woke up early and walked over got here around 8. She had been up all night and she was hammered. I made her something to eat and put her to bed, but she has to be at work at 6 and I doubt she will wake up sober. I am very worried about her, but wont let it interfere with what I am trying to do. This whole situation is very upsetting
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Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: wherever my feet take me
Posts: 1,314
Its strange I just dont feel like drinking. Maybe cracking my head open didi something to my brain, the first few days I was shaky as hell but now that thats gone I have no desire. I feel like reading friggin reading who would think. I am starting to think and worry about going back to work tomarow. Ive never been there sober not once. It is going to be weird. I have been hibernating for the most part I hope I dont get overwhelmed by something. This is a small beach town everyone knows everybody elses business. I feel awkward I dont know if they know why I was in jail but they do. I dont want people thinking I beat people up, we just had a really bad drunken fight that got way out of control. I embarrassed. I think I just bummed myself out. I better stop thinking so much. Keep telling myself it is what it is
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,965
Sounds like a higher power is doing for you what you couldn't do for yourself....
Glad you have 8 days of sobriety!!! Keep moving forward, it does get better and better!!
I had to lose everything to know the importance of living sober.
With love & hugs,
Glad you have 8 days of sobriety!!! Keep moving forward, it does get better and better!!
I had to lose everything to know the importance of living sober.
With love & hugs,
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
Originally Posted by Change4life
I feel awkward I dont know if they know why I was in jail but they do. I dont want people thinking I beat people up, we just had a really bad drunken fight that got way out of control. I embarrassed. I think I just bummed myself out. I better stop thinking so much. Keep telling myself it is what it is
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: New England
Posts: 259
Congrats on 8 days...that is a big accomplishment. Just take it one breath at a time...we can't change the past, but the future is somewhat in our control. Wishing you continued strength and good luck on your first day back.
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