Purplecatlover

It is hard in the beginning of recovery to watch others fail. You want to succeed, you want others on SR to succeed.
And it can be a huge disappointment when others fail.
I got attached to others like me & was horribly depressed if they slipped.
My AV had a field day, oh you're next, might as well give up now, this is impossible, etc
I think it made me realize our frailty. How strong addiction can be. And you have to be stronger.....and sometimes you just feel too weak to fight.

But I learned that the only one responsible for my sobriety was me. Not my alcoholic husband, not my horrible boss, my stressful life, my difficult child, my SR family, etc.
Those were all excuses my AV fed me to keep me chained in prison.
I had to debunk the lies & accept that alcohell lies & will tell you whatever it can to get you to pick up that drink.

My point is, don't give up. EVER. No matter what. It is not worth it.
No matter how many fail around you. Be strong & give them a hand up when they come back.

Life is not life if you're chained to a bottle of poison.

Jeni26

That was a great post. I really related to those fear feelings when others slip.
Very inspiring, thankyou so much for sharing xx

Vall

Dear Purplecatlover,

what a lovely message which I am sure we can all relate to - thank you.

Sapling

I had a good friend go out after two years sober the other day....He just stopped doing what he was doing and I guess he thought he could drink again...He was a great help to me early on....As I will be for him if he makes it back....It sucks to see it....And there is nothing I can do but pray for him. This fricken disease is relentless! I was at a meeting today where a lady shared with 27 years sobriety....We have the walls covered with collages of picnics and BBQ's from the last 25 years....She's in a lot of them...She pointed to one group shot she was in that 9 people (around her age) in it were dead....There are a lot of them...Serious business.

seanie1888

Well said plc, thank you for this lovely post x

Jeni26

Sapling-I know that's true. I've only been in the rooms for 6 months or so, but already 2 people from our group have died. This scares the sh1t out of me!x

Sapling

It keeps you honest....That's for sure.

sugarbear1

Old man Charlie said it today, "we're all gonna die. Are you gonna die drunk or sober?"

With love & hugs,

Threshold

I was at Target yesterday looking at the Halloween decorations. They have a black painted whiskey flask with a white skull and the word "Poison" on it.

I said out loud "Ain't THAT the truth."

they had shot glasses to go with it. Too bad that those words of wisdom will be seen only as a witty decoration and people will be laughing doing shots from them. I hope they don't find out the hard way that the label "poison" is NO joke.

EternalQ

Yes, I struggled mightily when those from my original Feb thread slipped. From those I've kept in touch with I believe I am the only one with an original Feb Sobriety date. But now I see how silly I was, because a number of them stopped drinking (just not in Feb) and years from now different months will mean nothing. Its only when you are starting out and each hour means something that you want others to stay sober right with you. It was hard to stick it out when others slipped. But you know what? It was just plain blanking hard!!! It was so hard I never wanted to quit again like they were having to do.

silly

I know what you mean. A few weeks ago I was feeling down and lonely so I called a guy I knew in OP rehab. He was so dedicated to recovery and stayed sober for such a long time. But when we talked he told me how he was done with recovery and, in fact, had partied with a few other guys from our original rehab group recently. Ugh! I was crushed.

I think the disappointing part for me was not that he slipped. Heck, I have so many times. What was disappointing and scary was that he'd given up... He wasn't trying to get back on track. Not to mention my other friends from rehab partying too! How discouraging.

Quinne

I'm feeling this today, what a pertinent post!

No-one in my "circle" of AA friends has actually slipped; everyone seems to be struggling, though

I'm meeting up with one of my closest friends in a little while to have a coffee and just chat. He's pretty cut up because a girl he would love to have a relationship with busted on saturday and stayed at his where she felt "safe" when the heroin withdrawals started and she was particularly vulnerable. I hate that he's upset, as I care about him deeply.

All I can do is offer to help him through this rough patch. While she's using and drinking, it's not going to happen. Maybe never. I know he has strong sobriety and have faith that he'll get through this, it's just hard