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Need to stop drinking

Old 09-12-2012, 09:37 PM
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Red face Need to stop drinking

I know i need to stop and now!! Yet i have a big vacation coming up and i am telling myself after vacation i will really stop....i have never been sober and i know that my chances are slim to none of stopping after the vacation. I tried to stop drinking 2 weeks before i leave and its been a week and i have slipped up twice already. My boyfriend is also an alocholic he wants to stop also both of us know its literally killing us....


OH AND i AM LEAVING OUT THE WORST PART...BEEN DRINKING FOR ABOUT 15 YEARS. LATELY IN THE PAST SIX MONTHS I HAVE BEEN USING DRUGS METH SOMETIMES AFTER I AM DRUNK...I REGRET IT ALMOST INSTANTLY. MY BOYFRIEND DOES NOT USE DRUGS AT ALL ONLY DRINKS. HE KNOWS ABOUT IT AND SOMETIMES WE TALKED ABOUT IT AND OTHER TIMES HE DOSENT SAY ANYTHING. SO HANGOVER DAY GOES LIKE THIS...HES SICK AND I AM SPUN. I HAVE NO ILLUSIONS THAT I AM HIDING IT. I THINK HE DOSENT YELL AT ME ABOUT IT CAUSE HE KNOWS I BEAT MYSELF UP ENOUGH. I ACTUALLY CAN TALK HONESTLY ABOUT IT WITH HIM AFTER IT COMPLETELY GETS OUTA MY SYSTEM. RIGHT NOW TRYING TO COME DOWN FROM LAST NIGHTS STUPITITY...HATING MYSELF
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Old 09-12-2012, 09:50 PM
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I hope it's a casual type vacation where you can pick venues which are mostly the non-alchy type. I know me, even at 11 months I would not want to go and sit in a casino, at a resort etc.. where the question gets asked every five minutes "What are you having?" I can handle it for a while, but would rather not. You are coming up on it quick and detox doesn't make for a great vacation... if you two are feeling really bad see a doctor.
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Old 09-12-2012, 09:52 PM
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Its an all inclusive resort...of course. We are alcholics...lol but its not funny at all. SERIOUSLY THOUGH THIS SUCKS. I KNOW I CANT DRINK LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE AND I WORRY WHAT MIGHT I DO NEXT TIME I GET REALLY DRUNK?? i SAW SOMEONE ELSE POST THAT THEY DIDNT LIKE BEING AROUND DRUNK PEOPLE AT ALL WHEN THEY WERE SOBER. I FEEL EXACTALLY THE SAME THEN I GO AND BECOME A SLOPPY, CRAZY, ANGRY, SAD DRUNK.
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Old 09-12-2012, 10:05 PM
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I used to be the type of drinker who'd end up staying in the room, completely wasted the whole time, the whole vacation.... kept on as if I had never left home.
Not sure what to suggest (if you can't cancel), but I hope you both can stay focused on get clean... Hopefully sooner rather than later.
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Old 09-12-2012, 10:06 PM
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People go to all inclusive resorts because the booze is free...Not the food. If you and your alcoholic BF are serious about getting sober....This would be a real bad idea. If you're not serious about getting sober...Then you'll probably go. I was a sad drunk....It sucks!
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Old 09-12-2012, 10:06 PM
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Hi Dreamingon

Welcome to SR - are you using any other support besides us?

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Old 09-12-2012, 10:13 PM
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We are going on the vacation. We are out going drunks till the hangover...i keep thinking we will just have drinks a couple of the nights...ya right!!! And when we get back thats it no more drinking....one last drinking trip. Everyone know thats 99.9999% chance of failure. I bet most of you are saying that i am not ready to quit....i want to, need to. I must sound crazy

I AM JEALOUS OF FRIENDS WITHOUT A DRINKING PROBLEM. THEIR LIVES SEEM SO MUCH BETTER THAN MINE ON A DAILY BASIS
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Old 09-12-2012, 10:19 PM
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Originally Posted by Dreamingon View Post
I bet most of you are saying that i am not ready to quit....
What do you say?....Honestly.
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Old 09-12-2012, 10:22 PM
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Originally Posted by Dreamingon View Post
We are going on the vacation. We are out going drunks till the hangover...i keep thinking we will just have drinks a couple of the nights...ya right!!! And when we get back thats it no more drinking....one last drinking trip. Everyone know thats 99.9999% chance of failure. I bet most of you are saying that i am not ready to quit....i want to, need to. I must sound crazy

I AM JEALOUS OF FRIENDS WITHOUT A DRINKING PROBLEM. THEIR LIVES SEEM SO MUCH BETTER THAN MINE ON A DAILY BASIS
But this doesn't help you.
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Old 09-12-2012, 10:25 PM
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i AM READY TO QUIT. BUT I AM STILL GOING ON THE VACATION. IF I END UP HAVING A FEW DRINKS I CAN LIVE WITH THAT. MOSTLY I CANT BE DOING THIS SAME OLD CRAP FOR MORE AND MORE YEARS. SO HAVE I CONTRADITED MYSELF?? I WANNA STOP BUT NOT TILL AFTER MY VACATION.

I DONT WANNA WASTE ANYONES TIME ANYMORE ON HERE. THERE ARE PROBABLY OTHER PEOPLE WHO ARE READY AND COULD USE EVERYONES ENCOURAGEMENT. AND I AM ALREADY PLANNING MY DRINKING ON MY TRIP. I WILL COME BACK WHEN I AM MORE READY. THANKS EVERYONE.
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Old 09-12-2012, 10:33 PM
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Originally Posted by Dreamingon View Post
I WANNA STOP BUT NOT TILL AFTER MY VACATION.
We'll be here...Be careful!
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Old 09-12-2012, 10:41 PM
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Well, I think you should continue to come and post and read here.

I was just posting the other night about how I was not ready to make a lasting commitment to stop drinking yet, and I did receive some supportive comments. And I haven't had any alchol for two days, so that's something.

I am guessing most people are searching for answers when they first come here, and aren't sure what they are going to do yet. If you already had it all figured out, why would you need to even come post here? I think you should stick around!
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Old 09-12-2012, 10:45 PM
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Originally Posted by Etta View Post
And I haven't had any alchol for two days, so that's something.
That's awesome...And the fact that she is even considering stopping is too...I drank way too many years without even thinking about stopping...It was painful and it cost me.
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Old 09-12-2012, 10:53 PM
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welcome dreamingon

I couldn't have gone a vacation like that, but it's your call.

I needed to make some big changes in my life - I really wanted to be sober.
I think most of us need to make that choice.


We're here for support if you want it

D
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Old 09-12-2012, 11:45 PM
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Hi deamington, [COLOR="Magenta"[/COLOR] From my experience it takes me something big and scary to be ready and after the thought of drinking is just awful. Yesturday someone said to me 'when someone has stopped drinking the first drink after is always the hardest, as the anxiety starts and the dread of what the drink mught do. After that there all the drinks are easier as nothing bad happened with that first drink. From that point the alcoholic in them is back and the cycle starts again'. Interesting I thought x
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Old 09-13-2012, 12:43 AM
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Hello and welcome to SR. Please don't feel like you shouldn't post here. We are here to support and encourage, not turn people away because they're drinking. We all know exactly what it's like to not know how to stop and it would be very hypocritical of us to do anything but encourage.

As for the vacation... I was sober a week when I went away with my husband, friends and family. We were on an all inclusive boat - alcohol was everywhere. I was lucky in that one girl was pregnant and my husband's mother didn't drink, so I tried to stick with them. What I'm trying to say is that it CAN be done, whether you planned to drink before on the holiday or not. Of course, when we booked the holiday I thought I would be drinking, but I was absolutely determined not to do it, and I thought to myself 'this is a pretty big hurdle to get over. If I can be sober during this, I can be sober during anything,' and I felt so proud of myself when I got home. I had the most fantastic, sober holiday and returned feeling refreshed and clear headed, which is what a holiday is supposed to do.

I'm not saying that you shouldn't drink whilst you're away, but I just wanted you to know that it CAN be done, nothing is stopping you making the decision to quit now and be sober during it.

All the best to you.
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Old 09-13-2012, 05:50 AM
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Originally Posted by Dreamingon View Post
i AM READY TO QUIT. BUT I AM STILL GOING ON THE VACATION. IF I END UP HAVING A FEW DRINKS I CAN LIVE WITH THAT. MOSTLY I CANT BE DOING THIS SAME OLD CRAP FOR MORE AND MORE YEARS. SO HAVE I CONTRADITED MYSELF?? I WANNA STOP BUT NOT TILL AFTER MY VACATION.

I DONT WANNA WASTE ANYONES TIME ANYMORE ON HERE. THERE ARE PROBABLY OTHER PEOPLE WHO ARE READY AND COULD USE EVERYONES ENCOURAGEMENT. AND I AM ALREADY PLANNING MY DRINKING ON MY TRIP. I WILL COME BACK WHEN I AM MORE READY. THANKS EVERYONE.
Don't go. You can get a doctors certificate and the insurance company will reimburse your holiday. I can't remember the precise details but I've definitely cancelled a holiday and got all if not virtually all monies back. Of course, depends on how much you want to stop drinking, only you can decide that. I always say to peeps "don't go" because that s what works for me. There are plenty of wonderfult things to do and go on without boozing. Good luck x
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Old 09-13-2012, 06:12 AM
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Originally Posted by Etta View Post
Well, I think you should continue to come and post and read here.

I was just posting the other night about how I was not ready to make a lasting commitment to stop drinking yet, and I did receive some supportive comments. And I haven't had any alchol for two days, so that's something.

I am guessing most people are searching for answers when they first come here, and aren't sure what they are going to do yet. If you already had it all figured out, why would you need to even come post here? I think you should stick around!
I really like that you said this. I too came here not knowing exactly what I wanted, but knowing that drinking is a problem in my life. Like, you I don't know if I'm ready to make a commitment to sobriety, but I didn't drink a thing yesterday and don't plan to today either. We'll see how it goes.

*Dreamingon, I've only been here a week now and from what I've seen most people here feel/felt the same as you. You recognize it's a problem and that's the first step
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Old 09-13-2012, 05:30 PM
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I joined months ago and have had more sober days than ever due to this site. I say stay reading and communicating--it's a huge help and others will encourage and support you to aim for lasting sobriety.
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Old 09-13-2012, 08:21 PM
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Welcome to SR Dreamingon. You'll find tons of support here when you're ready, and while you're getting ready plenty of food for thought so stick around!

They talk a lot about the AV here, the addictive voice within all of us. Your addictive voice is probably pointing out how much money you'll lose by not taking advantage of all the free drinks, that it won't hurt to have a last hurrah before you get serious about this quitting business, that the vacation won't be as fun sober, and all kinds of other pep talks to encourage you to drink. There is a flip side that the AV will not mention. You will lose money by not taking advantage of all the activities that you can't participate in because you're hungover or too wasted. You might do or say something while hammered that you can't take back or undo. You won't feel rested and relaxed after a week of unlimited drinking. You'll look bloated and exhausted in your vacation photos. MrsKing had an excellent post about her sober vacation.

Only you and your boyfriend can decide when you're ready, but sometimes the best time to start is now.
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