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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: wherever my feet take me
Posts: 1,314
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I havent been on this sight in years. I use to come on mainly for my crack addiction which thank god I was able to overcome. Havent used any form of coke in years. After I was clean from coke for a few years I was still drinking, but not out of control. I met a women we fell in love, but she was a drinker also. She was freshly divorced and we decided to pack all we could fit in the truck and moved to FL. Things were great in the beginning between us, we had a lot o problems finding decent housing but we were getting a long. Last March her oldest son was killed in a tragic car accident and we both lost it. He was a good friend to me, we were both devastated and we lost it started drinking out of control. Then we started fighting and drinking more instead of getting counseling. june 21st we had a bad fight, the police were called and i was arrested. She bonded me and proceeded to drop the case. the night before court I apparently went crazy. at some point she called bail bondsman and then they called me screaming. I guess I called back @2 AM. The next day I went to court went to see her and she told me she was revoking the bond. I ended up in jail for 22 daysmedicated the whole time gf kept making calls to get me out they lowered the charge and gave me time served she picked me up upon release took me home (our new condo that we just got. I packed a bag and was sent to stay with a friend. Not 24 hrs later I decided it would be OK 2 have 2 beers I got absolutely looped fell and cracked my head open and 2 lacerations on face i failed to realize how much meds were still in my system. While I was away they hired someone else so I ended up homeless an jobless. my manager told me to speak to the owner so there is a possibility i will be hired back. Im supposed to go see him today and I look like **** and feel pretty crappy but I havent had a drink in five days. I cant sleep so have been taking over counter sleep aids but during the day I am extremely nervous, I am supposed to be going to clinic to get meds in the next few days but in the meantime my nerves are shot. Can anyone recommend over the counter product that might help? when my boss sees me I doubt he will hire me back with my face looking like this. I feel like such an ass and I am very depressed
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Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 1,204
Wow, that's a lot. I am so sorry for your struggles and the loss you two suffered. You were good to come see us. We will give lots of support. September thread is very good, too, if you plan to quit. No other advice here, but glad to have you, and hang in there.
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
That's a handful...I think we all get to a point where enough is enough....If we're lucky. I can understand being depressed but you have to figure out what you are going to do to get stopped and stay stopped....That should be the only job you need to worry about. Have you thought about sober living somewhere?...Rehab with Salvation Army?...Or another low cost treatment?....AA? I don't think it would hurt you at all to start thinking real hard about some of these things...What can you do to change your life around?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: wherever my feet take me
Posts: 1,314
been sober 5 days at 9PM today
Starting AA FRiday this time I think I will listen. Friday I am going to a clinic down here to see how they can help.
I havent been on this sight in years. I use to come on mainly for my crack addiction which thank god I was able to overcome. Havent used any form of coke in years. After I was clean from coke for a few years I was still drinking, but not out of control. I met a women we fell in love, but she was a drinker also. She was freshly divorced and we decided to pack all we could fit in the truck and moved to FL. Things were great in the beginning between us, we had a lot o problems finding decent housing but we were getting a long. Last March her oldest son was killed in a tragic car accident and we both lost it. He was a good friend to me, we were both devastated and we lost it started drinking out of control. Then we started fighting and drinking more instead of getting counseling. june 21st we had a bad fight, the police were called and i was arrested. She bonded me and proceeded to drop the case. the night before court I apparently went crazy. at some point she called bail bondsman and then they called me screaming. I guess I called back @2 AM. The next day I went to court went to see her and she told me she was revoking the bond. I ended up in jail for 22 daysmedicated the whole time gf kept making calls to get me out they lowered the charge and gave me time served she picked me up upon release took me home (our new condo that we just got. I packed a bag and was sent to stay with a friend. Not 24 hrs later I decided it would be OK 2 have 2 beers I got absolutely looped fell and cracked my head open and 2 lacerations on face i failed to realize how much meds were still in my system. While I was away they hired someone else so I ended up homeless an jobless. my manager told me to speak to the owner so there is a possibility i will be hired back. Im supposed to go see him today and I look like **** and feel pretty crappy but I havent had a drink in five days. I cant sleep so have been taking over counter sleep aids but during the day I am extremely nervous, I am supposed to be going to clinic to get meds in the next few days but in the meantime my nerves are shot. Can anyone recommend over the counter product that might help? when my boss sees me I doubt he will hire me back with my face looking like this. I feel like such an ass and I am very depressed
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: wherever my feet take me
Posts: 1,314
This is the first time I actually made a plan, i always kinda floundered. I hated meetings and went buzzed or drunk to all of them. In and out never spoke to anyone never tried the steps. This time I am actually excited. My nerves are very shot and Im having trouble focusing, I am hoping the clinic can help me with that. I am glad I fell on my head very lucky I didnt kill myself, when my friends do something stupid I give them a light head plink. This was my head plink to myself. I needed to literally be hit in the head to wake up and realize where I was headed if I didnt stop. I thought i had it all going on, very popular on the strip cause of my job and cause I sing, but being popular isnt going to save my life
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
Welcome to Silkworth.net -Alcoholics Anonymous . . . experience the history . . . lest we forget!
Hang in there and don't drink...It will get better.
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