Blue29

It's been difficult explaining to my boyfriend and friends. They believe a person's true colors come out, I disagree. My boyfriend thinks that because I did this, I can't love him. How do I explain to people this is not the case?
It's also tough trying to have people understand that I do have a problem with alcohol, because most of them don't see me that way. I don't drink all the time, basically on the weekends, and if I am out they see me drinking and having fun.
They ask why don't I limit myself, and I have when I just have one, maybe 2. It's when I am out and don't consciously tell myself that is my limit that I go quickly from a slight buzz, to absolutely gone.

Nirvana1

Sorry to hear about your troubles.

I got sober in San Diego almost 2 years ago, and the recovery in AA is really awesome. There are tons of meetings that are designed for newcomers and younger people too.

Here are some links and a few groups that are great that I went to myself, and there are many more good ones on the website too:

Monday Meetings

7:00 PM - Mondays - LA JOLLA BEGINNERS GROUP
Church Hall 7725 Girard Ave

Thursday2 Meetings

08:00P - Thursdays - LA JOLLA NONSMOKERS DISC
Church ( 2nd Fl) 7715 Draper Ave (enter from Eads Ave)

Sunday Meetings

09:00A - Sundays - EARLY RISERS
Club (upstairs) 4861 Cass St

Twizzlestick09

[QUOTE=Blue29;3571687]I always thought about stopping drinkig, especially most recently after i would be argumentative and mean to my boyfriend, who I love dearly. He said he always knew I was a mean drunk, I had no idea it was that bad. Two nights ago I went out, was completely obliterated, and them started an argument and hit him while we were in bed and I was on top off him. Because of my drinking, I have now lost someone I imagined a life with, marriage, kids, everything.

---Dear OP--
I have done the same things too, in nearly the exact fashion and with the same thoughts as you. I feel so terribly I'm finally done. Im lucky I didn't seriously hurt him and wondering where its coming from. However I hurt his heart and outside of TWO instances I wouldnt be sobbing and slap/hitting him, both dont know how I could've done that -but believe he wouldnt make that up. Sober I worry relentlessly about his safety and well being to my core, catch myself not trying to cry worrying about his safety (hes had a couple bad bad seizures) and the night before I was nursing him because I couldnt believe he drank so much... freaked me out and the next time he was drinking I had some larger amount to compensate because I worried hed drink to much and id wonder if he had poisoning... it was really freaky to see him that way. Big mistake, I got upset at I-dont-even-remember and started crying and he went to get me from outside and in my tears I started hitiing at him. I was shocked it happened at all let alone AGAIN. Oh how mortifying its been. I saw us married, happy. I want to swear it off for good. Not a drop, afraid of this apparent pattern thats emerged like some monster. Our relationship is a rare gem, and its all I need and want. Ikniw its time to make a REAL change, not talk about it. I thought, hoped that together him and I could set ground rules on whats appropriate with the stuff.. you know his heart is my home more than a bottle! ...but will he forgive? It will take me time to show him, but like you I so want too. I was wondering how things worked out for yours and his relationship and if things have gotten better for you. I so appreciate this post even its coming late. Hope you get this. Thanks for sharing this here

Dee74

Welcome to SR Twizzlestick

Just to let you know...yeah, this is a 2012 thread - the OP may not reply

Good to have you join us though - how long have you been sober?

D