How many times did you relapse?
A simple guy making his way
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Maine
Posts: 7,867
Life is a singular thing... Event... Experience....
It's not ignorance that makes anyone look for love from others... So don't ever say that.
Thee are different kinds of love.
Love from a parent.... Love from a lover/partner... Love of a friend... And even love for no other reason than for the sake of being.
Self love is in there.... Kinda part of them all. It how we feel that may vary.
I hear in your responses a great deal of self love... Now it's how to get you to hear it is the trick.
That answer is in your own experiences and desires. Open your heart to yourself and go easy on the criticism.
Stay sober... Give it some time... And see if things don't change.
You cannot tear yourself down drinking and expect self love to be at the surface.
It's not ignorance that makes anyone look for love from others... So don't ever say that.
Thee are different kinds of love.
Love from a parent.... Love from a lover/partner... Love of a friend... And even love for no other reason than for the sake of being.
Self love is in there.... Kinda part of them all. It how we feel that may vary.
I hear in your responses a great deal of self love... Now it's how to get you to hear it is the trick.
That answer is in your own experiences and desires. Open your heart to yourself and go easy on the criticism.
Stay sober... Give it some time... And see if things don't change.
You cannot tear yourself down drinking and expect self love to be at the surface.
Powerless over Alcohol
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Trudging the Road to Happy Destiny!
Posts: 4,018
I cant count like it was said daily for decades feeling hungover to say not drinking today to for the last decade to having no choice but to get out of bed stop vomitting and shaking I had to get that drink down.
But I can say I had as many slips as I needed to get here where I am supposed to be..
The last one was the most important.
But I can say I had as many slips as I needed to get here where I am supposed to be..
The last one was the most important.
Trudging that road.
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Seattle Wa
Posts: 6,840
Yep just came from that post about self love and it is an awesome post.
Alcohol is a depressant so of course we are going to feel all these negative feelings. I drank not cause I felt unloved, I drank cause I am an alcoholic and addict, for that matter. It took me many years to get 8 years of recovery in-a-row. I needed to be desperate and do whatever it took, till that time all I did was play around with it. I think the only thing I did right in all that time is I kept coming back no matter what. Cause the traditions tell me the only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking/using. And I had that desire, I just needed the desperation that went along with it. It is so sad that so many of us have to lose so much before we quit, and some lose their life before they actually get the chance to really work it. I have to remember this is a deadly disease and till I started looking at it for what it really was all the words were just empty wishes.
I hope you decide to get off the fence and come join us cause it really is worth it.
Alcohol is a depressant so of course we are going to feel all these negative feelings. I drank not cause I felt unloved, I drank cause I am an alcoholic and addict, for that matter. It took me many years to get 8 years of recovery in-a-row. I needed to be desperate and do whatever it took, till that time all I did was play around with it. I think the only thing I did right in all that time is I kept coming back no matter what. Cause the traditions tell me the only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking/using. And I had that desire, I just needed the desperation that went along with it. It is so sad that so many of us have to lose so much before we quit, and some lose their life before they actually get the chance to really work it. I have to remember this is a deadly disease and till I started looking at it for what it really was all the words were just empty wishes.
I hope you decide to get off the fence and come join us cause it really is worth it.
Guest
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 3,452
I had a sponsor in AA who used to tell me to do esteemable acts.
We build self esteem and love from doing good things.
It comes from doing, being good.
When we are doing good things, we feel better about ourselves...at least I do.
The challenge is in motivating me to do good things always.
I am lazy. I am self-centered, and I drown in self-pity, fear, anger and resentment.
I build things up for myself and tear them down.
I imagine the only way that I will learn to love myself is by changing how I live so that it is good.
I listened once to an AA speaker that talked about how alcoholics always say how low their self esteem and love is, and that he felt that it was opposite. That we loved ourself too much.
We nurture our self. Give our self everything it demands. Self comes first. That's a lot of love to give self.
Something to think about or consider for sure.
Maybe I don't not love myself. Maybe I love myself too much.
We build self esteem and love from doing good things.
It comes from doing, being good.
When we are doing good things, we feel better about ourselves...at least I do.
The challenge is in motivating me to do good things always.
I am lazy. I am self-centered, and I drown in self-pity, fear, anger and resentment.
I build things up for myself and tear them down.
I imagine the only way that I will learn to love myself is by changing how I live so that it is good.
I listened once to an AA speaker that talked about how alcoholics always say how low their self esteem and love is, and that he felt that it was opposite. That we loved ourself too much.
We nurture our self. Give our self everything it demands. Self comes first. That's a lot of love to give self.
Something to think about or consider for sure.
Maybe I don't not love myself. Maybe I love myself too much.
That bell or bike person
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: london
Posts: 4,978
I used to try to give up after most hangovers and it usualy lasted about 12 hours to a week . Untill i realized who was i trying to kid i was out of control and so was my drinking and i realized i'd do anything to stop it including praying to anything, from passing aliens to the spaggetti monster at the center of the universe.
In doing this prayer to anyone who was listening i believe i humbled my willful ego .. once my ego was kicked into touch the desire to drink was "lifted" or greatly diminished, i realized i never have to drink again and was so happy, i have never drank again and know i never have to .
Bestwishes, M
In doing this prayer to anyone who was listening i believe i humbled my willful ego .. once my ego was kicked into touch the desire to drink was "lifted" or greatly diminished, i realized i never have to drink again and was so happy, i have never drank again and know i never have to .
Bestwishes, M
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: East Coast, The States
Posts: 12,162
I never quit before now, because I didnt think quitting was even POSSIBLE for me.
Then I found SR, and joined the Feb 2012 class, and with their support, I quit all alcohol, and I have not relapsed.
But as everyone will tell you, there but for the Grace of God, go I.
Then I found SR, and joined the Feb 2012 class, and with their support, I quit all alcohol, and I have not relapsed.
But as everyone will tell you, there but for the Grace of God, go I.
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