Coco210

I saw the post by Dee74 asking someone, who has relapsed, what will they different this time? And it a very fair and thought provoking question to many of us. I am going to dig deep inside of myself and find the answer...my life has to change, and not tomorrow...now. My question is this...for those with mltiple relapses, what did you do differently to succeed? And do you think AA is a must for the majority of us to really succeed? Many thanks...searching within...

Auvers

I am sober 3 months and I am convinced i will not drink again. The biggest difference for me this time was that I acknowledged to myself that I did not have and never would have an ability to moderate my drinking because the truth was that when I took the first drink, I was already thinking about the others to come. I accepted the fact that it was not the wine I wanted, it was the buzzy-headed journey away from the world. I also took a review of my life and could identify events, choices i made from as young as 17, that served to undermine my chances for happiness and all the choices stemmed from protecting my alcohol-centered lifestyle. When I accepted these facts head on, I quit and said never again. I did not go to any type of meeting, I am far too introverted to do that. SR has been helpful and encouraging.

bbthumper

Not sure if AA is a must for the majority of us.I do know what my experience has been. I know that more than the majority of folks I have seen who work the program of AA get and stay happily sober. If you are someone who is looking for more than just "not drinking", AA is a great option in my opinion. Those who apply the program in their lives receive a lot more than just staying dry. Best wishes to you!

candi7

I'm not a chronic relapser in AA (but when I tried to go dry on my own-i was not successful), but I know in the 108 days sober I've had, AA has saved my life and is changing it for the good. I've got friends that are REALLY there for me and I've got an awesome sponsor who will not give up on me..

smacked

I personally don't think AA is a must for anyone to succeed at recovering from alcoholism. I do think however that true recovery involves a complete life change, and that's a lot of hard work. I needed help to do it.. for some people that comes from the steps of a program, from others through counseling or some other format. I do know I didn't do a great job at treating my own addiction issues by myself.. if I could have fixed it, I probably never would have had an issue.

Anna

I am not an AA person, but I did change myself from the inside out. I think that it's the motivation of the person, rather than the program they follow, which determines success.

What I learned from many failed attempts at stopping, was that there was always a tiny crack which said 'well, maybe...'. As long as my thinking was like that, I couldn't succeed. I had to accept that drinking was no longer an option in my life, and I started finding ways to deal with life.

There is hope and you must not givde up.

doggonecarl

For years I went through the cycle of deciding to quit drinking, then deciding to drink again. Quit/drink, quit/drink, over and over.

That's not recovery. That's addiction.

Before coming here two years ago, I committed to recovering from my alcoholism. I have yet to un-commit.

That's recovery.

IndaMiricale

Ditto doggonecarl..

I did the wash and dry cycle.. Till I worked the steps and really come to see myself.. AA for this alcoholic..

jennikate

AA here too. I think there is a big difference between dry and sober and I'm working on the latter. Really working the steps not going through the motions. So far, so good.

Dee74

I know it's a question I ask a lot, lol - but I think it's necessary.

I don't think we can make changes in our lives by making changes.

Doing the same thing over and over tends to lead us back to where we started.

Wanting to be sober is great - but it was never enough for me - I needed to put effort behind that want & actually work to stay sober.

Sometimes just a simple change can create a ripple effect that can last the rest of our lives.

For me it was joining SR - for others it was joining a recovery group, for others it was seeing their Dr or a counsellor, or going to rehab - others find prayer useful, or getting involved in something they love and finding a purpose.

If what you're doing is not working, or not working enough for you, don't be afraid to try something new or add something else to your recovery programme.

It's our lives we're working for

D

hypochondriac

What a great thread Coco

I don't class myself as a multiple relapser because I never made it past day 1 (or 2 at a push) before I accidentally stumbled onto SR. Even then it took me months before I even made a serious attempt at quitting, and the one thing that was different was that I had support from other alcoholics, so to me that is what made it work. I think accountability had a lot to do with that, just having someone to tell that I had made a commitment to quitting drinking. But because I found it so hard to just put down the drink in the first place I think my determination to just do anything it takes to stop me drinking again is what is keeping me sober. It doesn't have to be AA but tbh I am headed that way because I think it will push me out of my comfort zone. AVRT was what helped me the most starting out because it just gave me the help I needed to just make the decision to quit and stick to it.

Good luck in whatever you try Coco x

freshstart57

Coco, if you ask someone who is searching where something can be found, some of the replies you receive will tell you with certainty where the responder stopped looking. But you asked about the majority, right?

Another answer to your question is that the majority of people who stop drinking do it without any program. Period. They have been doing it for 4000 years, since grapes were grown for wine. That is still true today.