LilyMarie

Someone on another board said to me that "AA is not the place where we happily report how good things are when we are sober."

My question to those who are following AA...is that how you feel about it, too? I was a bit taken aback when this person said it to me.

I know there is a ton to AA and I'm just learning. I've gotten the Big Book, have attended a few meetings, but didn't realize it was unacceptable to say "hey, I've been sober for (only if a few weeks) and I'm feeling good." Not cocky "oh, well, I'm cured!"-good, but I'm for once feeling optimistic, and have hope that there IS an end to where I've been the past few years. No, it's not going to automatically ever get better. It's going to take hard work and I certainly know it will have its ups and downs. It will be something I need to put work into the rest of my life.

Just...curious. Thanks, everyone.

Latte

Not all the time it isn't. I don't usually say anything about the way I feel in a meeting, usually it's the meeting after the meeting where I discuss those things or with my sponsor.

When someone says something about AA that I don't agree with I usually just leave it alone. I can't see any point in trying to argue with someone about their program.

CoF1984

I've been regularly attending AA for a bit over a month now...since close to the time I sobered up..and to me the meetings are a place where you can share the good, the bad and the ugly. Whatever you're going through at the moment, even if it is happiness and there is always someone there who understands and relates. So, at least for me it's been a very good experience. I would say keep attending and make an informative decision on it for yourself and see if it's a place you feel comfortable at with sharing any and everything. If it is then that's great, if not there are plenty of other options available. I wish you much luck and hope that maybe I've at least been a little helpful.

Wes

gravity

I've been attending meetings for 15 months. I try to speak from the heart and with honesty.

Most of my shares are positive. If I'm struggling, I will also try to present the solution. Also, most of the meetings I attend are positive - experience, strength, and hope.

I dunno. I don't think a meeting is a place to dump all your problems but then again, it may keep some people sober.

desertdonna

I've never heard anything like that before, LilyMarie. I would encourage you to feel whatever you feel. More power to you if you are positive and optimistic. It sounds like you have a very realistic perspective which can only benefit you.

So that's a no, that is not my experience with AA in particular or recovery in general. In fact, I recall a particular meeting when a newer participant brought this topic up for discussion. Those with long-term sobriety told the gentleman to "keep riding that rainbow" for as long as he could.

It's good to "meet" you and I hope your recovery brings you much joy.

Big hug,

Donna

LilyMarie

Thanks very much for the responses, all.
When I was told that, I completely held my tongue, because what do I know! I'm learning each and every day.

Taking5

Lily,

I agree with the sentiments above, I think you can share it all ay an AA meeting, great, good, so-so and crappy.

Every AA group has it's own personality. Chicago is a big place with, I am sure, thousands of meetings a week. i suggest you "shop around" until you find a meeting you are more comfortable with.

Midas

Whoa. Maybe that person was just in a bad funk that day. AA is a place where you get real. AA is a place of refuge. AA is where we heal. Sometimes AA is where others seek to spread their sickness. It's not pretty. AA is about being involved with people and helping them recover. AA is for winners. Some old-timers may tell you that if came for sympathy, you might as well go across the street to the bar. AA is where we go when things aren't going well.

CAPTAINZING2000

If, I didn't have a smile on my face from attending AA, I'd of left many years ago.

Depending on where you live, what type of meeting you're attending.

I tend to avoid a Wed. night meeting in town due to the fact, mostly people that, have to have a paper signed for court purposes are there.

My Thursday night group has a good core. Sad, we don't get more new commers to our local meetings.

I no longer have drinking problems just living life on life's terms today, just like Earth people.

I'm glad, you're feeling good. It's amazing how good the body feels when, you're not poisoning it with alcohol.
Just let the good feelings flow to carry you through the times when, you have a bad day.

Your car, will still need to be worked on. Your sinks will still get clogged. A friend will still disappoint you. Your parents or other family members will still expect things from you that, you don't want to do.

That as Old Blue Eyes used to sing, That's Life

CarolD

That is not my experience in AA....I share on the meeting
topic and then may add whatever is on my mind.

AA recovery has been a positive adventure in living
sober for me for years. It can be for you too.
Please do keep going and growing.

Forward we go...side by side...

Midas

If that person snubs you again, maybe mention Rule #62... [Don't take yourself too seriously] We're not a glum lot. We are trudgin' the "Happy road of destiny".

TTOSBT

I do not agree with that statement at ALL!
AA for me is a place where I do share my experience, strength and hope.
The meetings I attend are very focused on the solution which is a very happy place to be!

firestorm090

Geez, isn't getting happy, possibly for the first time in our lives, why we are trying to kick the booze to the curb?

Why get sober if you just wallow in misery? Seems *ssbackwards to me.

TTOSBT

We are NOT a glum lot!

Dime

Hi LilyMarie,
I know exactly what you are talking about because it did happen to me after I shared that I was feeling pretty good at a couple of months. A Chairperson said I shouldn't be feeling that well because I hadn't completed all the steps yet. He no longer seems to be asked to Lead or Chair meetings anymore. What I now understand is that this poor man is suffering inside due to the loss of a loved one in his immediate family.

I learned that certain meetings and people seem much more positive to me and I continue to hang around those. Try different meetings in different clubs as they can be quite different.

Tommyh

lilymarie
you mentioned it was said on a forum.Leave it there.Forget it.
I have been sober a little over 20 yrs and my home group always loves to hear good optimistic news on how newcomers are getting sober and happy in AA.It encourages the rest of us,so spread your encouragement around.The rest of us love it.it may be what another newcomer needs to hear today!

SelfSeeking

Yick, keep me away from the meetings that guy goes to! Being sober- clear-headed, healthier, grounded- is remarkable, especially when you're early in. I try to share when I'm really feeling joyful about it at a meeting, especially because it balances the times when I need to go "arrrrgh!"

stone

"AA is not the place where we happily report how good things are when we are sober."

What's wrong with happily reporting if things are good? LOL

However, I have sat in many AA meetings were 90% of the shares where along the lines of, "I love AA" and thought to myself these people are just cheerleaders, change the record. That is just me being a miserable sod though.

Emimily

i've shared everything from i love my life! to i hate everything and everyone. in meetings. so... no, my experience isn't like that. sometimes there are grouchy folks that are drinkin haterade, but i just leave that to them - their side of the street is none of my business, ya feel me?

on the flip side, it is SO nice to hear sponsees feelin good and other folks feelin good... friends, family, friends that have become family... that's the juiciest part of recovery for me.

nelco

someone is not A.A. Remember principles before personalities. I share my feelings good and bad, always looking for a solution and trying not to live in the problem. A.A s about solutions to our problems. Please dont ever feel you have to defend feeling good, we were miserable long enough. NO ONE can tell you how you feel. They are your feelings. I am coming up on 11 yrs in A.A and my experience has been positive,
Keep on feeling good........keep on feeling!!

Oh yeh...may I happily report how good things are today........................there great!!! Im not drinking.....im alive!!