Sober for the first time in 2 years.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 200
Sober for the first time in 2 years.
Hi, My name is Ragamuffin and I am an alcoholic.
Not a functioning one either... I'm a stay at home, disabled, drink alone, cry, anxiety stricken alcoholic.
Two days ago at 7 p.m. after drinking all day I fell asleep and woke up and decided it was time.
My anxiety isn't near as bad as I thought it would be. Although it is still pretty bad. I have panic disorder and have received disability for the past year and a half.. a good amount of money too.
The last two years are a blur of tears and constant.. I mean constant morning until night daily drinking.
I've met the tiles in my bathroom more times than I can remember...
I haven't been outside of my house in two months.
I'm scared of having a seizure.. i've heard that happens sometimes. Although my withdrawl symptoms are nothing really more than a bit of anxiety, sore as crap muscles, headaches and a messed up tummy.
I've gained over 100 pounds in 1 year due to drinking. Yeah, beer gets me.
I'm hopeful for the first time that I can really do this..
I'm terrified. I can't sleep. My anxiety sucks. I can't relax. I feel so alone.
Alcohol was my best friend... my only friend.
Any tips on how to make this even a little better? Just help... please.
Not a functioning one either... I'm a stay at home, disabled, drink alone, cry, anxiety stricken alcoholic.
Two days ago at 7 p.m. after drinking all day I fell asleep and woke up and decided it was time.
My anxiety isn't near as bad as I thought it would be. Although it is still pretty bad. I have panic disorder and have received disability for the past year and a half.. a good amount of money too.
The last two years are a blur of tears and constant.. I mean constant morning until night daily drinking.
I've met the tiles in my bathroom more times than I can remember...
I haven't been outside of my house in two months.
I'm scared of having a seizure.. i've heard that happens sometimes. Although my withdrawl symptoms are nothing really more than a bit of anxiety, sore as crap muscles, headaches and a messed up tummy.
I've gained over 100 pounds in 1 year due to drinking. Yeah, beer gets me.
I'm hopeful for the first time that I can really do this..
I'm terrified. I can't sleep. My anxiety sucks. I can't relax. I feel so alone.
Alcohol was my best friend... my only friend.
Any tips on how to make this even a little better? Just help... please.
One Foot in Front of the Other
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 582
Welcome, Ragamuffin! Keep reading and posting! You will find a lot of support here, from people like myself who have been where you are. And friends? Some of the most kind and empathetic people I've ever run across are right here on this board. You may want to check out the Class of September 2012 thread. There is strength in numbers.
One day at a time, Ragamuffin...one hour or one minute at a time if you have to. Having suffered from depression and anxiety for quite a while, I can tell you without hesitation that alcohol is a temporary fix when longer-term measures are needed. It is not your friend, it wants you to isolate. Ultimately, it wants you dead.
We want you to live, to grow, to be what you are capable of being. You CAN do this. I hope you'll consider sticking around!
One day at a time, Ragamuffin...one hour or one minute at a time if you have to. Having suffered from depression and anxiety for quite a while, I can tell you without hesitation that alcohol is a temporary fix when longer-term measures are needed. It is not your friend, it wants you to isolate. Ultimately, it wants you dead.
We want you to live, to grow, to be what you are capable of being. You CAN do this. I hope you'll consider sticking around!
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,775
Any chance of seeing a doctor for help in getting safely thru the w/d? Alcohol withdrawal can be dangerous. Once you get thru the first week you should start feeling better but if you don't, see your doctor to be sure.
Welcome to the site!
Welcome to the site!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Florida
Posts: 316
I'm an recovering alcoholic. I have anxiety issues, but the doctor wants to wait till I'm 6 months sober before she diagnoses me. It's kinda pointing the bipolar way with me-but it may not be-we shall see.
If you have problems with the symptoms-don't hesitate to get some help...
Start by taking good care of yourself. If you are not doing so on a daily basis (I was guilty) but set up your daily routine.. I brush teeth in the morning, dress and groom in the morning, shower/bath at night-brush teeth.
Clean the house-if it's overwhelming-do a little each day-maybe write out a to do list-till it's done and then maintain it daily. Nothing like a clean house to bring some order to things and enough hard work to help clear your mind..
While you are taking better care of yourself. Maybe you could consider feeding yourself better.. Just stopping drinking-you will drop some weight..BUT maybe you could portion control your food, maybe you could limit the sweets/fats. How does it feel to drop a few pounds-you start feeling better about yourself... Maybe you could take a stroll to your mailbox or around the house a few times-then maybe to the end of your block and back.. ( I lost 50 pounds-on a diet/exercise)
I journal alot, gotta get things out of my head sometime..
I do recommend alcoholics anonymous-it's very supportive as far as your sobriety is concerned.
We read the big book-you can find an online version of our books- read and journal about what you read...Work up your courage to find a local meeting and go.
Alcoholics Anonymous :
And as far as your mental issues-keep your appointments and let them know you have quit drinking.
Keep up the amazing effort and know you are not alone!
If you have problems with the symptoms-don't hesitate to get some help...
Start by taking good care of yourself. If you are not doing so on a daily basis (I was guilty) but set up your daily routine.. I brush teeth in the morning, dress and groom in the morning, shower/bath at night-brush teeth.
Clean the house-if it's overwhelming-do a little each day-maybe write out a to do list-till it's done and then maintain it daily. Nothing like a clean house to bring some order to things and enough hard work to help clear your mind..
While you are taking better care of yourself. Maybe you could consider feeding yourself better.. Just stopping drinking-you will drop some weight..BUT maybe you could portion control your food, maybe you could limit the sweets/fats. How does it feel to drop a few pounds-you start feeling better about yourself... Maybe you could take a stroll to your mailbox or around the house a few times-then maybe to the end of your block and back.. ( I lost 50 pounds-on a diet/exercise)
I journal alot, gotta get things out of my head sometime..
I do recommend alcoholics anonymous-it's very supportive as far as your sobriety is concerned.
We read the big book-you can find an online version of our books- read and journal about what you read...Work up your courage to find a local meeting and go.
Alcoholics Anonymous :
And as far as your mental issues-keep your appointments and let them know you have quit drinking.
Keep up the amazing effort and know you are not alone!
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