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Old 09-02-2012, 08:02 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Daniel,

I’m not an expert and only on my ninth day of sobriety but I have found AVRT to help, check out the secular forum for more details. If you google it there is a free online crash course.

There is also a 'sticky' in the Alcoholism forum which lists a range of programs and resources. You have to find what clicks for you.

Well done on making this decision now, it shows a lot of foresight and maturity that I think a lot of us (or least me) didn’t have when we were your age. I am now the grand old age of 37 and wish I hadn’t wasted so much time.

We’re all here for you.,

x
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Old 09-02-2012, 08:04 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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There are approaches that don't entail a spiritual program, Daniel. SMART and AVRT are two popular ones around here. Many people have quit simply relying on SR; that's how I started out, then I began to explore AVRT (it turned out I had been intuitively using Addictive Voice Recognition Techniques already).

We have some active discussions of these approaches on the Secular Connections forums. Well, fairly active, lol... Things quiet down a bit on weekends as folks head out and enjoy their newfound freedom.

Hopefully your friends are getting to an age where they will start to find other things to do than drink—but this really needs to be all about you and what's good for you. After I got solid in my new lifestyle, it was not a problem for me to be around friends who were drinking. But honestly, it was not a lot of fun, either. I discovered that when people get drunk, they're pretty tedious. Laughing hysterically over things that aren't funny, debating the most trivial things. Shocking, I know. I'd rather watch a movie or read a book. Or better yet, have a conversation with a friend who isn't drinking.
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Old 09-02-2012, 10:47 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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DanielPrescott, well met, and welcome to SR. There is a lot of support here for you, and many people who will share with you how they have quit drinking.

I should also add that I am not a religious person and don't have a faith or anything. I'm not saying that to sound like spiritual advice would be a waste of time, but rather I would like to avoid any help which involves a higher being or something.
Daniel, this is an important statement that you have made here, and I think it deserves a great deal of respect. Make no mistake, there is a lot of help that does not involve higher beings. I can suggest that you look at our Secular Connections forum for alternatives to 12 Step recovery.

I want to be able to say 'no thanks i dont drink' without the fear of not having fun.
You can put fears to rest right now. When I was drinking, I thought I needed booze to have fun, to relax, to be sociable. It wasn't until I stopped drinking that I realized how miserable I was, how tense, how antisocial I had been. It had been really giving me nothing, and had just taken everything instead. A giant con game, and boy was I a sucker.

You really can quit drinking, Daniel, honest. People have been doing it since the first days of wine, and that is over 4000 years. You can be one of them, and it can all start now. Accept that you will no longer drink, that there is nothing that can make you drink, and that all the lies you hear in your head about alcohol come from the voice of your addiction, not from you.

There is so much waiting for you, just make that first step. I wish you the best.
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Old 09-02-2012, 08:44 PM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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Hi Daniel,

Welcome to SR! No advice, just wanted to commend you for going for sobriety now, instead of waiting until you have wasted years (or decades) like some of us have.

I wish you the very best. Keep us updated on how you are doing!
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Old 09-02-2012, 11:05 PM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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I pretty much just use this forum and reading addiction memoirs and articles. I've found that once I committed to not drinking, I could draw inspiration from lots of places.

I'm glad you realize that the problem lies in how alcohol is negatively affecting your life, not simply what or how often you drink. If you miss your life, you can get it back. I feel like I was away from myself for a long time, and it feel amazing to have come back.
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