myhappyproject

I'm sharing my blog post for the day:

So, my fear now is a false sense of security.

First, I need to give myself some props. I'm out of town, there's a liquor store down the street from my hotel that I usually frequent. I was upgraded to first class which means unlimited alcohol for the 4 hour flight to Dallas and I have maintained my resolve and I even maintained my clean eating habits and got my butt up on the treadmill for 40 minutes tonight after work, YIPEE.

My normal pattern would have been to drink all the way to Dallas, hit the liquor store for a half gallon of vodka and drink myself to sleep. Day two I would have probably started drinking when I woke from my interrupted sleep pattern around 5am and drank on and off the entire day. I would have bought another 1/2 gallon to take home in my suitcase since I can charge it to my expense account in lieu of dinner and by the time I called home I'd be well on my way to a black out.

My apprehension is day 9 and beyond. The last time I felt this strong and excited I hit about day 9 and then decided I could handle a "glass" of wine. Innocent enough until I had capped off a couple of bottles and slide back down to buying and buying gallons of vodka and hiding it in water bottles.

I so don't want to do that anymore, I'm really tired of being sick and tired.

S.T.A.Y - sober today and yesterday and TOMORROW! fingers crossed, I fly back home tomorrow night, free drinks and all.

Sapling

If you are sick of it...Don't pick up no matter what...Do what you have to do to not drink...Move back to coach if you have to...Just don't drink.

RevivingOphelia

You're doing great--keep it up! I love your username

Pigtails

Thanks do sharing. Way to turn down those free drinks. You would have to pay a price after all!! Keep going! You can do it.

myhappyproject

Thanks for all your support and replies. I made it home from Dallas with no issues, didn't even want a drink. BTW, with my status I get a free drink in coach as well, so giving up first class isn't the solution, my resolve is the only solution to my drinking.

Alcohol is all around, at the grocery store, the drug store, the airplane, the hotel concierge lounge, client dinners, dinner with friends or even with my husband. I haven't "declared" my sobriety, but I do tell people I have stopped drinking when asked.

I guess I need to re-think that strategy, but day by day I'm getting stronger. I remember when I quit smoking about 6 years ago, it was really hard for the first 30 days, then I had a slip, then I got right back on the wagon, a few months later I had a slip, then got right back on and never looked back. I'm not sure drinking will follow suit, but I never thought I'd be able to quit smoking my first real try after smokingn for 20 years.

Wishing everyone an amazing day!