Getting back on track
 

Its now 32 hours since my last drink and I am so proud of that! Its been more than a full day and night of freedom. Of course even this short space of time makes me realise the gaps in my life that I'm so used to filling with wine. Lonely, bored, sitting on the couch flicking through tv channels. Thinking about exercise, contacting friends, reading and all the other stuff that would actually make my life more fulfilling.

Drink is such an easy mask to put on and it has kept me isolated in this bubble of procrastination and demotivation for a long time. I think if I can stay with it this time I'm going to begin living properly, not just caught up in thoughts of drink, moderate, quit, drink...

There's so much more out there, and within myself also, that I can focus on as I push to get out of this loop. I'm reading the AA big book at night too which is keeping me grounded and also keeps denial at bay!

Way to go! I like your outlook of not drinking as freedom. I'm going to use that. :)

Hi Phoenix. I totally relate to this. I'm only a little over a week sober and through writing, I'm starting to explore all of the things I've put off in the oh, past 10 years due to substance abuse. I have bookshelves filled with books I haven't read, paintings I haven't finished and a phonebook full of people I have put off calling. Oye.

Now we finally have time for these things, don't we? I wish you the best of luck.

way to go!! that's excellent!

Yes, I think each small change we make causes a ripple effect in our lives. That's the joy of recovery. :)

My life started when I quit drinking. Only problem is that I am now 42. I wish I was 22 and I had gotten it.
I am not upset with myself too much, I have the rest of my life to live sober. I do know that my life started getting and feeling better when I turned my life and my will over to my Higher Power. He-She God, or the Creative Forces have done wonders with my life in the past 8 months!! I am so much happier and fulfilled.
I remember though, not too long ago, I was feeling just like you. I was so lonely. I had no idea what to do with my time, I had drank since I was 15 and now I am 42 - no bars anymore, none of my old friends, alone at home with netflix as my friend! It was hard for a while, but I got over it. I just kept telling myself "I can do this" and I did. I got me a God Box and started putting every one of my problems, dreams, wishes, etc... into it, and then they started coming true! It is an amazing process when I just allowed it all to happen, and give it over. Stay around for the miracle!

Welcome aboard Phoenix.

welcome to SR Phoenix :)

D

Its very comforting to know I'm not alone in this.

Oooriogrrrl, I wish you luck too with your books, friends and especially your paintings! I would love to be able to paint but no doubt if I could, up to now it would have been with a glass of wine in one hand and a paintbrush in the other!

Anna, reading your words on 'the joy of recovery' felt like an invitation to a far better way of life.

Soberbrooke, thank you so much for showing me where I'm heading once I stay committed. Last night even though I was lonely, just me and tv, I told myself ' At least I'm not drinking' and that did help. I'm going to keep your affirmation of 'I can do this' in my mind and also another post I read about wanting to be sober more than wanting to drink. The 'God box' idea is cool and allowing the miracle to happen...wow!

God I actually feel more hopeful and excited about not drinking than I have in ages. :c031:

You really aren't alone. I'm just hitting day 4 and I know exactly where you're coming from.

Have a lovely day and keep posting.

G

Awesome I see its almost 24hrs more since you started this thread yesterday... :)


It is a beautiful thing, there will be ups and downs. Life still happens but you can learn you never have to drink over them. Glad to see your reading the Big Book. Good stuff. As many others will say the Doctor's Opinion is just like reading about yourself. And without a doubt page 21 is me. I just loved gettting "tight" or trashed at the most oppurtune moments.

Good to have you here.. Keep on this journey. It never stops amazing me.. :)