Sobriety Limericks.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Cheshire, N.W England
Posts: 6,803
Thanks Instant, I sing it in the car at the top of my voice on the way to work. Gets me some funny looks. lol
There was once a lady named Grace
Who drank wine till she fell on her face
Straight from the bottle she'd swig
Not giving a fig
But now she's slowed down the pace.
The wine's down the drain
Washed away by the rain
This new person is me
and I've everything to gain
Gx
There was once a lady named Grace
Who drank wine till she fell on her face
Straight from the bottle she'd swig
Not giving a fig
But now she's slowed down the pace.
The wine's down the drain
Washed away by the rain
This new person is me
and I've everything to gain
Gx
TiG
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Chicago Area
Posts: 381
One beer two beer three beer
Four beer,five beer six beer
Need more
Went to store
Seven beer eight beer nine beer.
Ten beer eleven beer twelve beer
Bakers dozen standing near.
AM
PM
Want to cry but no tear.
Four beer,five beer six beer
Need more
Went to store
Seven beer eight beer nine beer.
Ten beer eleven beer twelve beer
Bakers dozen standing near.
AM
PM
Want to cry but no tear.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Cheshire, N.W England
Posts: 6,803
Ha ha. I love these. Heres another
I used to drink too much wine
I thought it made me slicker
I hid the bottles everywhere
Even in my knicker
But that wine got a grip of me
i couldn't let it go
It turned me into someone else
Someone I didn't know
Those dark days are now gone
And I'm happier drinking water
My life is good and I am happy
I'm a nan. a mum, a daughter.
Gxx
I used to drink too much wine
I thought it made me slicker
I hid the bottles everywhere
Even in my knicker
But that wine got a grip of me
i couldn't let it go
It turned me into someone else
Someone I didn't know
Those dark days are now gone
And I'm happier drinking water
My life is good and I am happy
I'm a nan. a mum, a daughter.
Gxx
TiG
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Chicago Area
Posts: 381
The old dog for sure knew his hops
and a few of the refined local cops
his name was keg
and stood on one leg
at the bar licking his chops
"there's that beauty of mine"
Kegger whistled each time
"I truly love thee"
"my one and only"
"sumptuous, alluring, sublime"
not like his wife who left long ago
or the boss he used to know
a smooth lather
made his heart patter
as he quickly washed down their sorrow.
he would grin and chat with the folk
totally loved any clean or dirty joke
and with dry mustache
he laid down cash
but could not believe when the barman spoke
listen Keg, you've got to go home
the bar is closing and you'll be alone
there is no more
so head for the door
and count the footsteps of a life to atone
where did the fun stop where did it end?
this road must have had one last bend
with a cost
of being lost
and my beauty and laughter all pretend
Keg knew in his heart something was needed
and at this point any exchange would be conceded
for a new way of seeing
past his empty being
and to be lead back home by one who succeeded
the old dog for sure knew his hops
but now knows it never stops
his name is now Andy
what it used to be
and he stands on two legs proud to be called Pops.
and a few of the refined local cops
his name was keg
and stood on one leg
at the bar licking his chops
"there's that beauty of mine"
Kegger whistled each time
"I truly love thee"
"my one and only"
"sumptuous, alluring, sublime"
not like his wife who left long ago
or the boss he used to know
a smooth lather
made his heart patter
as he quickly washed down their sorrow.
he would grin and chat with the folk
totally loved any clean or dirty joke
and with dry mustache
he laid down cash
but could not believe when the barman spoke
listen Keg, you've got to go home
the bar is closing and you'll be alone
there is no more
so head for the door
and count the footsteps of a life to atone
where did the fun stop where did it end?
this road must have had one last bend
with a cost
of being lost
and my beauty and laughter all pretend
Keg knew in his heart something was needed
and at this point any exchange would be conceded
for a new way of seeing
past his empty being
and to be lead back home by one who succeeded
the old dog for sure knew his hops
but now knows it never stops
his name is now Andy
what it used to be
and he stands on two legs proud to be called Pops.
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