Why 90 days?
 

When people come here who aren't sure if they want to quit or aren't sure if they are alcoholic one bit of advice given is to quit for 90 days and see where you are at. Then what??

I'm at 93 days and still not sure if I'm an alcoholic. I just don't get it

I have read somewhere that 90 days allows one to re-equlibrate, if you will, to a new pattern of behavior.

Stay quit for another 90 and see how you feel then??

My opinion is labels don't really matter. Alcoholic, problem drinker, or whatever. If alcohol causes problems in your life, then you are better off without it.

Don't sweat any of this 90 whatever. There is nothing to get. Some people just want to understand that counting days is a worthwhile marker, and so there it is...

In any case, why are you not sure you're alcoholic?

I only sought help this year because I wanted to get of vicodin. I have always been a weekend drinker, but until this year never would have thought to stop drinking. It just wasn't a big deal and often I could have a few and stop. When I saw my therapist in December about the pills he asked about my drinking and basically he told me I was an alcoholic.

Aeo the definition of alcoholic was never my thing. Called what ever you want.

It's the end result of the drinking that I am working on. That has defined my life and not the term.

When I stop drinking life changes. Why? Was the alcohol to blame? I think so. Do I need a label to change my life? No. Just stop drinking.

What ever mindset is needed by anyone trying to do this is what they should be doing.

Do your own thing!

It's not really for anyone else to tell us. If we have a problem,we know it, no matter how much we try and deny it

What do you think?Do you think you have a problem with drink? What happens when you drink? Can you not stop/control it? are thereconsequences of your behaviour that you regret?

A lot of people (therapists included) think that if a person has an addiction problem with one substance, they probably would have an addiction problem with any other substance. I don't believe that. Pills, pot, or anything other than beer was never an issue with me. I have never abused anything other than alcohol and 90% of that was beer.

All of that said, my point is, just because a therapist said you were alcoholic does not mean you are.

I see.

Are you being successful with quitting vicodin, which is an opiate? Mixing alcohol and opiates is a serious dangerous business, yeah? I'm sure you already know all about this...

I can control it sometimes, and sometimes I get drunk and do stupid stuff. I have been battling this back and forth for so many months and still have no idea if alcohol was bad in my life. I know drugs were, but before drugs came around the alcohol was ok I think. The kicker is could I go back to drinking like I did pre-drugs. If so, I'd do it in a heartbeat.

Yes- quit those cold turkey and will never take one again.

I feel like I'm asking permission to drink...which if I knew FOR SURE I didn't have an issue I wouldn't be posting about it. This is something I may just have to find out on my own.

Awesome.

So, you have a great insight already into you and addiction... why are you, in your words, somehow apparently struggling with being or not being an alcoholic?

OR...have I been talked into thinking I am an alcoholic by the therapist?

Because I don't want to go to meetings anymore. I don't want to read recovery books and "work" on my recovery. I just want to BE.

Do what you want, aeo. I will be here, sober if you return.....or read your old posts....

Only you can make the decision if you are or aren't an alcoholic.

Love & hugs,

Okay.

Well, FWIW, I am just me. I don't have to go to meetings, read recovery books, or otherwise "work" on my recovery to keep happily sober. :)

I'm a recovered alcoholic drug addict, so, there you go, it can be done. :)

:a122:

Or is your addiction trying to tell you that you are okay to drink, trying to catch you in a moment of lowered inhibitions and causing you to accept an offer of drugs? In my honest opinion, drugs and alcohol are both mind altering substances and the reason we do any of them is to alter our mind. So if we are addicted to any mind altering substance, it is a slippery slope to attempt any mind altering substance. Anytime I struggle with whether or not I am an alcoholic, I tell myself there are plenty of people who never drink for many others reasons, altheticism, health, family history, medications, illness, ambitious/busy doing other things. Being an alcoholic is not the only reason not to drink so I don't have to be one to stop. I hope that all made sense. Haha.

I understand alcohol wasn't the main issue for you, but don't forget that it's a drug also..... it targets the same receptors as opiates, and your brain chemistry could be changed (more susceptible) at this point.

Then there's also the motivation factor- I think it's difficult, once we've established a pattern of altering our moods, to get to a place of "innocence" (for lack of a better word), where it wasn't a big deal one way or the other.

Did you ask your therapist about their reasoning?

Because it's a nice, round number. Addiction isn't well understood scientifically, so its treatment isn't very far from leeches and pentagrams.

I'm the same way, and I asked the same question a little while ago.

If you don't mind, I'll quote what you said to me: