Drinking runs in my family, I am on a bad track.
 

I grew up with booze in my family. It was always Frank Sinatra and the rat pack in my family. At a young age I learned drinking was...funny? I didn't have my first beer until 18 and my first semester in college...I broke up with my love of 4 years and it all came crashing down. Last march I moved out from my single mothers house, "who drank frequently" and I lived with roommates for about 7 months. My mother was diagnosed with MS in July of 2011 and now...I am home...I work a great full time job at CVS with no benefits but i am trying. I am a fairly attractive guy with a bad habit. Me and my mother argue, she can always smell the hard booze in my room. I go through maybe about a half a fifth and 2 or 3 beers and im done for the night. In my hard times i can drink about a 5th...She told me if i keep drinking hard then I need to leave. I am worried which is why im here. I am 22 and honestly I just want the cold card facts. Don't play with me i have heard it all. I am willing to listen. Just respond with positive advice or a similar life story. I want to hear i am not alone...:You_Rock_

You're definitely not alone - welcome :)

Some of us have family histories of drinking, others don't...what really matters is what we do about it now :)

You'll find a ton of support and ideas here :)
SR really helped me turn my life around 5 years ago :)

Are you open to the idea of face to face support as well - something like AA or some other recovery programme, or some form of counselling?

D

I should ad that i drink 4 nights a weak, to the point i cant see straight and I black out. I wake up full full of dehydration. My boss who is young has called me out on my hung over smell twice and I am ashamed.

well
 

I feel like where I live is fake advice honestly. I life in a **** hole of shallow, rich and blah blah. I grew up with hard work. I grew up where my car...my pride and joy at 500 bucks, didn't compare with with mommy and daddy's new mustang. I always grew up with less and so did my ex which is why i left her when her new car added to her complaints of no ac and *** with my car. Which I BUILT MYSELF. Now she is engaged and happy b/c he is 25 and she is 22 and now im 22 with a 19 year old. I am scared this cycle will continue.

Welcome :) And your so not alone.

Well I can just give a brief run down of my expierance. I started drinking regulary around 17. But I grew up around drinking and drugs my whole life. I did more drugs in high school than drink, drugs were just so much easier to get for me. And mom, and dad where and are big drinkers. Mom became a heroin addict for year. I grew up in bars. Literually I would use a chair to play pinball and shoot pool till I was tall enough.

By the time I was 21 I drank daily. All was fine and dandy for many years. I moved around the country had good jobs and a great time. By the time I was 27 , I drank alot every day and had a serious crack habit. I stopped all the coke,crack and things when I was 38. But from 27 to 39 I became full blown alcoholic major shakes when I woke, I drank morning, noon, night . After servel trip to the Er for health related issues to alchohol , I wound up in the ICU. So I had 4 dui's , lost home, lost car, lost my soul, my care of the and me. All I wanted was to get a drink to feel better.

Now I am just about to be 41 and today I am ever so grateful for AA and SR, I am happy, and at peace with the past and the future.

So it is such a progressive disease, grab hold of sobriety now and live a good honest healthy life.

Good love, Inda. :)

hey
 

My mom lives with an ex alchoholic, I own his car which he wrecked badly last year. He has 7 dui's and spent over a year in rehab. She hates him but lives with him and I am confused. I feel like it is because she feels she cant get another guy who can support her MS. I get so mad sometimes.

Welcome to SR.
It sounds like you really want to change your life and that's the first step. I would recommend you spending time on here. I was hooked up to this site for hours on end in the first week or so. Read how others are getting and staying sober. There are lots of methods that work.
If you are drinking heavily almost every night, I would also recommend you seeing your doctor to talk about how to detox safely.
Good luck, keep us posted x

I feel like these responses are copy and paste...I can't find a real site with traffic other than MTV?

I need real advice now...

You sound like you got a lot of confusion and emotion going on, drink or drugs arn't your friend in that situation.
Prioritize and tackle the problems one at a time, try to find something to do to relax yourself and sleep well .
It's going to take a while to get things right but it aint impossible .

M

I have no Idea how to handle my emotions and confusions honestly. Every night I am a train wreck looking to blank out all my pain.

Yeh , learning how to take the pain without drink or drugs is hard, took me 15 years from where you are now before the pain of changing was less than the pain of staying where i was, nearly did my liver in . Good news is you don't have to be like me, some of what people say might sound stupid but they got some big experience and you've got to respect that .

If you cant change what happens outside you head you got to change whats going on inside your head . If i can do it you probally can you got a great headstart,

cheers, i'm off to work, take care bud , M

Mystrongisweak:

You are not alone, yet everyone's story and journey is slightly different. Maybe that's why you are not getting the answers you want.

It sounds like you are in that beginning stage of trying to come to terms with your drinking, emotional and psychological pain and finding a way out. It can be overwhelming and does dredge up a lot of negative feelings and helplessness. This is the first step in the process. Do you have anyone you can talk to honestly about your drinking who will support you and help you to move from thinking to action?

On this site there are a couple of threads that you might want to read to help you start to put together a plan to prepare yourself to stop drinking. Given the amount that you are drinking, medical supervision is strongly advised, including detox.

Many abusers have admitted to themselves on one level or another that they have a problem long before they take action, just as in a bad marriage the signs are there for years before separation.

Here's some of the links:

On detoxing http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html

On Recovery Program and Resources http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html

I always say knowledge is power, and the more one learns, the more one can be an active participant in one's own healing. If you don't have someone you trust that you can talk to, there are hotlines to call for help.

Good luck during this very painful time and keep coming back. In the beginning, it is baby steps, but for each step you take forward it is progress and those baby steps will turn into leaps and bounds.

Dig deep and you can do it!

It sounds like living with your mom is somewhat of a toxic environment for you. Is there a way for you to find a place of your own? Or with roommates? If your mom has a boyfriend then she's not alone dealing with her MS. That could be a good first step in finding some emotional peace.
I know you said you don't have insurance and that is really tough. However, how about checking out a community clinic. It can take quite a bit of time to get in but they do have counselors and psychiatrist that can help with depression both with therapy and medication.
Also, AA meetings are free and are a good way to get out of the house and meet people when you're not at work. It doesn't hurt to check out a few meetings and see if it's something that might work for you.

Welcome, Mystrongisweak. I hope you'll spend some time here as there really are a lot of good people in these forums that want to help. My only advice is not to get attached to the idea that because drinking "runs in the family," that you will necessarily have to endure a long struggle with alcohol. We make our own choices and we can overcome environments where there is substance use and even genetic predispositions to addiction if we are willing to do what it takes to create a new life for ourselves.

I don't know if it will help, but I can share that I grew up with an abusive alcoholic step-father for several years. My biological father was addicted to pain meds for a long time, something that I did not even know until fairly recently. It would be all too easy for me to conclude that "I come by it honestly," but I know that's just an excuse.

You write that you have a hard time sorting out your emotions. There is no one here who did not go through the same struggles when they were drinking or on drugs. The booze, pills, etc. cloud our brains and hamper our ability to experience our feelings as they should be. I will admit that, for many years, I have been afraid to truly embrace my inner truths for fear that I would look weak. Ironically, the very booze that I was using to anesthetize myself against my feelings was making me weaker every day.

You've acknowledged that you need to make a change. It sounds corny, but that really is the first step. The SR forums are a great place to meet people with similar experiences and to create a plan of action for building a healthier life. Take advantage of this resource. I'm sure glad that I did.

Best wishes to you in your recovery.

Well I sure didnt copy and past that for you.

So I hope you take some of the above direction...

You lived outside of mommy's home for 7 months, then moved back in for what? If she has a significant other, what was the reason for you to move back home?

The amount you are drinking is pretty high for your age, by the way.

Dude, do you want to stay stopped or what? What are you really seeking on this site? No MTV here, I have antenna tv. I went to AA at the age of 25, didn't think I was "one of them" in that meeting, and for 25 more years proceeded to "ruin" what life I did have (and it was a college educated, career losing one).

Do you want to think more clearly? Stay stopped from the drinking cycle you are in?

I have no real advice. I can offer my experience and how I really messed up, 'cause "I'm not one of them."

I hope you find sobriety. Lots of young people are able to recover from this, whatever it is, this "too much drinking and life's a party, party on, dude kind of life."

AA, AVRT, SMART, Rational Recovery, LifeRing, SOS (and also Women for Sobriety) are available options to help you recover.

I wish you well!

Thank you so much for the responses. It feels good to know others have made the choices I have and advice on how to turn this around. Sugarbear thank you for your input as-well, I apologize for the sarcasm.