Who needs enemy's !!!
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Scotland
Posts: 35
Who needs enemy's !!!
Went out for a couple of games of pool with friends last night. So I was on soft drinks, but when my friends went up for my drink. Twice they got Jack D in my Coke. Was pissed off and there reply was it's being sociable. Last time I checked, talking and being out going is sociable. Is it just me or is that bang out of order ?
A simple guy making his way
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Maine
Posts: 7,867
Sorry to hear that about your friends. But as most here will attest to you need to put yourself first. If being sober is what you want.. Either explaine to your friends how what they did is not ok. Or get new friends.
My best to you!
My best to you!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Scotland
Posts: 35
I said I wasn't happy about it, but there reply was it's being sociable. They won't be doing it again, I think they think I'm not serious about giving up everything. I'll give them the benefit of doubt this time, but if it happens again I'll lose the rag !!!
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: South East England
Posts: 8,008
Well it sounds like you left them in no doubt..
I think someone newly sober can be threatening to others because it makes them question their own drinking. I've had drinking buddies who have gone quiet on me...it hurt at first that they weren't supportive, but I've found out who my real friends are!
Good luck x
I think someone newly sober can be threatening to others because it makes them question their own drinking. I've had drinking buddies who have gone quiet on me...it hurt at first that they weren't supportive, but I've found out who my real friends are!
Good luck x
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Scotland
Posts: 35
It's shocking because I was contemplating drinking it. I get the first time they might find it funny, but the second time is just bad taste. We've grown up together through school, so hopefully it won't come too that. Cheers for your comments, this site helped more than I ever hoped for.
I looked like that holdin beer
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 627
I picked a few friends up for a BBQ and they said there wasn't going to be drinking, but when I arrived to get them they where already drunk, and had a bottle of whiskey packed for the BBQ. Sheesh! Needless to say the BBQ was a no go for me.
Hopefully your friends will start taking your more seriously now that they know how important it is to you
Hopefully your friends will start taking your more seriously now that they know how important it is to you
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Canada. About as far south as you can get
Posts: 4,768
Originally Posted by Count 
Went out for a couple of games of pool with friends last night. So I was on soft drinks, but when my friends went up for my drink. Twice they got Jack D in my Coke. Was pissed off and there reply was it's being sociable. Last time I checked, talking and being out going is sociable. Is it just me or is that bang out of order ?
All the best.
Bob R (A Scot in Canada)
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Join Date: Jul 2011
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Keep in mind while you're learning to be a new you, your friends have to get to know a new you too (I sound like Dr. Seuss lol). I told one person who I work with how I'm trying to give it up. Her responses "How long are you going to do this anyway?" and she suggested I have a drink after work last night. I think because I've been joking about how hard it is she felt it was okay to dangle it in front of me. Not helpful! Your friends need to realize you're serious! I agree with Bob, they don't want to catch it too
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Scotland
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I'm not crazy. I think it's weird for them not seeing me drink, because we've been doing it for the past 13 years, and also think they were thinking I was just being another person saying they were giving up and having no intention of stopping.
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,678
I had a similar thing this week where 2 'friends' had my hands and were trying to pour JD down my throat! (And people say no one can force you to drink 
).
It is totally out of order Count, but then I reckon it is hard for our friends to just suddenly have to accept that we don't drink anymore. But then I/we don't always help matters by not being totally honest about it. When I let a bit more information out about why I quit my friend was really apologetic.
If you don't feel strong Count it may be an idea to give those social occasions a miss for a while, just until you are certain you can deal with situations like this. Certain friends I have made sure I only meet up with in the day for coffee for that very reason. I can't control what other people do and how they respond to my not drinking but I do have control over my own environment. If I don't feel like being around alcohol I don't have to.
).It is totally out of order Count, but then I reckon it is hard for our friends to just suddenly have to accept that we don't drink anymore. But then I/we don't always help matters by not being totally honest about it. When I let a bit more information out about why I quit my friend was really apologetic.
If you don't feel strong Count it may be an idea to give those social occasions a miss for a while, just until you are certain you can deal with situations like this. Certain friends I have made sure I only meet up with in the day for coffee for that very reason. I can't control what other people do and how they respond to my not drinking but I do have control over my own environment. If I don't feel like being around alcohol I don't have to.
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