Many, many, many thanks
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 117
Many, many, many thanks
Thank you to all of you who replied to my Day 1 post.
I have conquered Day 1. I am home for the evening. There is no wine in the house. It could have gone differently...Stopped by the store on my way home from work to pick up some cheese. My usual thing is to pick up that one more thing I need in order to fix dinner...and usually more wine (always wanted to make sure I had 'enough') I knew it was risky to go to the store today, especially when the cheese is just beyond the beer and wine. I decided to face this beast head on and so I charged in.
I was tempted to turn my head and avert my eyes from the alcohol section--maybe go all the way around to avoid even walking by the endcaps, but instead I just got pissed at the alcohol monster that has been controlling me for so long and walked leisurely right through the darn section! I let her look at what she would never have. She started to rear her ugly head to protest, but I just silently said no. No wine. No alcohol. I think I tortured the beast a bit, but I wanted her to know that I mean business. I will be tempted down this road, both now and later and I will not give in. I am over it. I want clarity. I want sanity. That feeling that I still remember is much more of a craving--at least today--than the temporary, happy blur of alcohol.
I won't always test my luck like I did today but I am feeling strong I wanted the beast to know I am in charge from now on. That being said, I'm a little anxious and a little agitated tonight--expected symptoms, but I did some yoga, some breathing and drank some warm tea and lots of water. I am thankful to be on my way.
I have conquered Day 1. I am home for the evening. There is no wine in the house. It could have gone differently...Stopped by the store on my way home from work to pick up some cheese. My usual thing is to pick up that one more thing I need in order to fix dinner...and usually more wine (always wanted to make sure I had 'enough') I knew it was risky to go to the store today, especially when the cheese is just beyond the beer and wine. I decided to face this beast head on and so I charged in.
I was tempted to turn my head and avert my eyes from the alcohol section--maybe go all the way around to avoid even walking by the endcaps, but instead I just got pissed at the alcohol monster that has been controlling me for so long and walked leisurely right through the darn section! I let her look at what she would never have. She started to rear her ugly head to protest, but I just silently said no. No wine. No alcohol. I think I tortured the beast a bit, but I wanted her to know that I mean business. I will be tempted down this road, both now and later and I will not give in. I am over it. I want clarity. I want sanity. That feeling that I still remember is much more of a craving--at least today--than the temporary, happy blur of alcohol.
I won't always test my luck like I did today but I am feeling strong I wanted the beast to know I am in charge from now on. That being said, I'm a little anxious and a little agitated tonight--expected symptoms, but I did some yoga, some breathing and drank some warm tea and lots of water. I am thankful to be on my way.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 8,334
Congratulations on making it past the wine department. Wine is tricky, as it's everywhere. In our state you have to go to the state liquor store for hard liquor. Why oh why, do they have to put the wine by the cheese....geez
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
Soulgypsy, you have ATTITUDE! I think that is just great. I can remember that feeling that you must have had when you arrived home, like a King Kong GRAAAAAAARRRRRR ooh ooh ooh.
I also like the way you were torturing that beast-who-is-not-you. It's about time that those tables got turned. Well done. I liked the idea of exposing that beast, turning the spotlight up high and blinding it with my focus. It can't even try to be sneaky without being called out, pointed to and laughed at. Loser.
I also like the way you were torturing that beast-who-is-not-you. It's about time that those tables got turned. Well done. I liked the idea of exposing that beast, turning the spotlight up high and blinding it with my focus. It can't even try to be sneaky without being called out, pointed to and laughed at. Loser.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 8,334
Cereal and wine.....
Originally Posted by Missy7 
Congratulations on making it through the store! I know how hard that is. I did the same thing--cereal and wine. Then the bill, which should be $8.00 is suddenly 20. So great job.
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