twal

I have been drinking for over a month and can't stop! I was sober for the last two days, but the withdrawals have been terrible. I went through sweating/shaking/minor twitching, and my brain is still craving alcohol. The only thing that I've ingested other than alcohol today was a medium Dunkin Donuts iced coffee. A normal person would at least get something into their stomach, but I just want to get F'd up and keep the buzz going.

What scares me are the alcoholic deaths on my mothers side of the family. My great-grandfather, grandfather, uncle and first cousin all died at a young age from this terrible disease. I don't want to be the next in line

I have been to two rehabs...Healthcare Connections in Tampa, FL (28 days in 2009) and Shands Vista - The University of Florida at Gainesville (90 days in 2011). Both programs had excellent staff and also great recovery plans. I never wholeheartedly finished both programs and gave them my all.

Maybe I was destined to drink myself into oblivion. I just don't know anymore?

Dee74

Have you seen a Dr Twal - that might be the first step?
Detox can be rough for some of us.

Have you tried other things besides rehab?

There's many different approaches and methods of recovery around - here's some links to some of the main players:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html

I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum if you think you may benefit from a non 12 step approach.

I really believe anybody can stop - if they put enough energy & commitment into the task
D

hypochondriac

Erm, definitely not! You are struggling because quitting drinking is bloody hard! It's hard enough even without having withdrawals to suffer through. But it is not impossible. I think anyone sober on here will probably scream 'If I can do it anyone can!' because I'm pretty sure we all thought this was impossible at some point!

If you have never wholeheartedly finished a program then maybe that would be a good place to start, and get help with withdrawals from a doctor if you can. There is no reason to make this harder than it has to be. I know the tendency to say 'it's hopeless' is strong but I really do think that there's more help out there for alcoholics than we will accept when we are still drinking.

Take care of yourself x

Ghostlight

I'm sorry to hear of your situation. I drank like you are for years, not months. I wouldn't eat for days because 'I didn't start this fire to put it out', food ruined my buzz and had no use for it.

There are ways out, you've been to rehab, you must have picked up some tools there. Use them.
My other advice would be to go to a doctor and be brutaly honest about your drinking. A month straight is a long time, you may experience withdrawal and require the help of a professional.

I've been where you are and made it out alive, as you stated, some don't.
Think that next drink through to the end and the horrors it'll bring.
The good news is, there's hope on the other side. I drank almost suicidaly for twenty years and now have over two and a half years sober.

I really feel for you because I've been there, and I wish you the best.