Service to others

Old 07-18-2012, 01:49 PM
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sobriety date 5-2-12
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Service to others

In my meeting last night part of the topic was depression (which I have) and giving to others of ourselves (which I never do). I realized last night that I never give, never volunteer. Not with kids school, my Temple, anything. I never want to be "put out" or have to adjust MY schedule for others. Also, I do like to volunteer bc I am afraid I will screw it up, but mainly just due to laziness I think.

Went to a women's meeting today and a newcommer (1 week) spoke and said she needed rides. Without even knowing where she lived (if it would be way out of my way or not) I gave her my phone number and offered to drive her to any meeting I was going to (I go 5-6 times a week). Baby steps... I'm headed in the right direction.
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Old 07-18-2012, 01:51 PM
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I don't do anything like that either. I'm all "ME ME ME" It's terrible. Good for you for helping that lady! Great step!
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Old 07-18-2012, 01:55 PM
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Good for you, Aeo.

I strongly believe that you get back what you put out into the Universe.

I hesitated to do volunteer work because I felt like I had nothing to offer. But, the Universe put a Volunteer opportunity in my path in my first week of sobriety and I took it. It was my first big effort at changing. And, it saved my life, no question.
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Old 07-18-2012, 02:24 PM
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I love helping others !

Aside from sponsoring a child overseas, I also coach football and try to do my best helping newcomers ! Plan on also starting to volunteer @ a local humane society
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Old 07-18-2012, 03:05 PM
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I have a feeling that that the spark which ignited your impulse to offer a ride may lead to a conflagration. This may include benefits that are now hard to imagine.
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Old 07-18-2012, 03:12 PM
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good goin. now how bout showin up early, helpin set up for the meeting and satying after to clean up? one of the best ways to get out of the selfishness is to get into action.
if we dont change our habits and stop making excuses for them, we aint gonna get mentally,emotionally, and spiritually healthier.
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Old 07-18-2012, 11:16 PM
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Hear hear. It is amazing how much you get out of helping others. Addiction can be very painful, and a lot of that pain is self obsession. I have 19 days clean, and have volunteered a morning a week in a soup kitchen/cafe, and am going through procedures to help with meetings in prisons. This stuff will save my life I have no doubt - and by life I mean happy life, not some miserable 19 years dry drunk who still shuffles into meetings for the free biscuits.

It's not about who is sober the longest for me, I look for the happy sober people, and learn from them - they do service.

Went out getting signatures for a petition with no food 2 weeks ago at 3 days sober. Random strangers fed me. It comes back in a myriad of ways.

No one ever went broke by giving, that's not how the universe works.
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Old 07-19-2012, 12:31 AM
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Good for you, aeo. I haven't volunteered in a long time, though I used to volunteer for many different charities doing a variety of things, and it really did make me feel a lot better about myself - perhaps it's something I should get involved with again, too.

I know it's a big cliché, but I definitely think 'what goes around comes around' in this world.
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Old 07-19-2012, 06:06 AM
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That is great.
I want to tell you about my experiences when I did that though. A year and a half ago when I tried to get sober for the umpteenth time, I heard a woman say that she needed rides, so I gave her my number and started to pick her up. She started calling me everyday and I couldn't say "NO". It turned into more of aburden to me, and I ended up not being able to stay sober.
Keep your boundaries up!!
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Old 07-19-2012, 06:17 AM
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That is not a baby step. That is an adult leap.

"Service" is about being open to help. I don't think you have to be part of any organized service program. Just saying "yes" to people in need is enough.
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Old 07-19-2012, 07:20 AM
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"For if an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through service and self sacrifice for others, he would not survuve the certain trials and low spots ahead."

"Selfishness, self centeredness! That we think is the root of our problem"

"Nothing will so much insure immunity from alcohol as intensive work with another alcoholic. It works when all other activities fail"

"We alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness. We must or it kills us"
(Big book quotes from the first edition)

Sometimes I forget that my life depends on me helping others. My self centeredness will kill me if id fail to work with others. When my life seems to be in the dumps, I usually find it is due to my prayer and meditation lacking or, more often my lack of 12th step work. I gotta be careful with this. I start getting selfish and I very gradually start getting uncomfortable with the world around me. I fall back into my old way of thinking and suddenly a drink seems like a good idea. A subtle foe indeed! I can be completely blind to it.

Working with others is the pay off of the whole deal. If I'm not doing it, its like working for two weeks at a job and then not going to pick up my paycheck!
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