No Drinking?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Queens, NY
Posts: 13
No Drinking?
I like to drink when I go to parties and such. I am having a really hard time grasping the fact that in AA you can NEVER drink. I just stopped drinking like a day ago and I am so torn. My therapist tells me I have a problem, my boyfriend thinks I only drink when I am anxious (I have GAD and on medication). I am trying to convince myself that I can just moderate myself, I don't want to never drink again. Does anyone else feel this way?
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Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 2,707
If you try to stop and you can't then you're alcoholic. My boyfriend thought I didn't have a real problem, too. But my doctors did. Every time I went to the doctor for anything it turned into a discussion about alcohol. I think your therapist probably knows best. But....do you only drink at parties? Do you have blackouts? Can you control how much you drink? It's hard to say.
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: Ca
Posts: 51
Yeah, never again is too overwhelming to wrap your brain around. That is why we say one day at a time. Sometimes it's one minute at a time. Just don't drink for today or don't drink for this five minutes. It's hard at first. Once you get through some rough moments you see that it can be done in the present. That's the only place you need to or can stay sober. Be patient and try and focus on the now
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
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You can find healthier ways to deal with life than drinking. As alcoholics, we are not used to dealing with uncomfortable feelings, but you can learn. And, don't stress about 'forever'. 
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Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 2,707
Originally Posted by JMariano825 
I like to drink around new people so I am not so shy.
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Cleveland, OH
Posts: 1,191
Some people can moderate. Theyre not alcoholics. Not sure if you have tried, but if you are an alcoholic it wont last long.
Please understand though, alcoholism is a fatal disease. Thats not a theory, its the truth. This thing kills. So if you cant moderate and feel youre an alcoholic, youd better treat it sooner rather than later.
Please understand though, alcoholism is a fatal disease. Thats not a theory, its the truth. This thing kills. So if you cant moderate and feel youre an alcoholic, youd better treat it sooner rather than later.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: The Sunshine State
Posts: 95
I have a hard time grasping the NEVER as well. And yes, I feel the exact same way you do. In fact, I've had several people tell me that I don't have a problem, and "not to stress" about it. But I think we know deep down inside something is amiss, and we're not like "normal" drinkers. I found myself Googling alcoholic alot more, and red lights started going off the more I read. Just stick around, you will find out the answer, time will tell. Hang in there, it's a tough road, either way you take. But eventually, one road gets smoother.
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Coventry West Midlands
Posts: 56
Its not just alcoholism that's fatal. Heavy drinking even when you are not addicted can be fatal too.
I think I was a heavy drinker rather than an alcoholic. I could happily be in a bar and drink soft drinks. I've still done serious damage however.
High consumption of alcohol can be and often is fatal. In the short term this can be from choking on vomit, motor accidents when you are under the influence, and other things. Long term causes serious ,quite often fatal, damage to your body.
This does not even start on the harm and upset caused to others by your drinking.
Cov.
I think I was a heavy drinker rather than an alcoholic. I could happily be in a bar and drink soft drinks. I've still done serious damage however.
High consumption of alcohol can be and often is fatal. In the short term this can be from choking on vomit, motor accidents when you are under the influence, and other things. Long term causes serious ,quite often fatal, damage to your body.
This does not even start on the harm and upset caused to others by your drinking.
Cov.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Utah
Posts: 54
I was sober for 13 years and went back out, thinking that I could control it. Didn't work and I found out real fast that I was indeed an alcoholic. As has been mentioned here, if you try and stop and find that you can't, then you're more than likely an alcoholic.
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,896
If, when you ate peanuts, your throat and tongue swelled to the point you couldn't breathe, would you have a problem saying you will NEVER again eat peanuts or anything containing peanuts?
What is so great about alcohol, anyway? It killed my father and my uncle. It has killed many, MANY people, some famous and others not so famous. It will kill you if you allow it. It wants to kill me, but I will never allow it. So...what is so great about alcohol?
What is so great about alcohol, anyway? It killed my father and my uncle. It has killed many, MANY people, some famous and others not so famous. It will kill you if you allow it. It wants to kill me, but I will never allow it. So...what is so great about alcohol?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Queens, NY
Posts: 13
What is so great about alcohol? That is a good question. I always told myself it was helping my anxiety in social situations, but then I started to isolate and drink alone everyday. I still do not know how I am going to handle going to parties and events where there will be alcohol. I actually have a party coming up and they give you two free drinks upon entrance. What am I to do?
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 557
Don't think about not being able to drink ever again. Just make a deal with yourself to not drink today. Just don't drink today and tomorrow make the same deal.
That being said - if you still want to drink at parties and such - no approach to sobriety will work
That being said - if you still want to drink at parties and such - no approach to sobriety will work
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Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: New England
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You can give your free drink tickets to a friend. I'm sure someone will be happy to take them off your hands. I have a very hard time with never again concept too, but try to follow advice of people here and try it a day at a time. That's more manageable for most people. I know if you're drinking alone it's gone beyond drinking to be social or less shy. I'm guessing it's not very fun either. I'm here because I don't want to move into the drinking alone and drinking all day long stage...
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Originally Posted by JMariano825
I like to drink when I go to parties and such. I am having a really hard time grasping the fact that in AA you can NEVER drink. I just stopped drinking like a day ago and I am so torn. My therapist tells me I have a problem, my boyfriend thinks I only drink when I am anxious (I have GAD and on medication). I am trying to convince myself that I can just moderate myself, I don't want to never drink again. Does anyone else feel this way?
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: upstate ny
Posts: 26
I guess, not having hit a rock bottom, i feel the same way, really never again???? I guess at this point its more important to say not today like many have said. Im on day 6 and not really missin it, but know that in some situations its gonna be really hard to say no . Not sure if i can have one or two, i guess never really tried. Best of luck!!!
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