Anna

'No, thanks', is enough, no explanation necessary.

HitRockBottom70

My closest friend I was truthful with... Not to worry him, but so he would never be "polite" and pour me a drink when others are drinking.

My partner of course knows most of the whole truth (minus the sneaking bottles and filling others up with water).

As far as others, it really is none of their business. I worried about this at first too... And I found making up a reason like weight loss or meds brought on more questions. When I just said "I am longer drinking alcohol", people left it at that. This is not a lie, and it gives no room for them to question your resolve. You owe them no explanation beyond this. I also found having a soda or water in my hand keeps people from asking if I want a drink.

Good job on 30 days!

Hexipuff

I was only thinking about this the other day. I don't want to lie but again I don't want everybody I meet in a social situation to know my business i.e husband's work colleagues, local committee members, groups of work colleagues I hardly know.....

I'm just going to say 'I just don't drin , it's not what I want to do anymore'

I have already told the people that matter to me that I am an alcoholic - were they surprised - of course not.

WritingFromLife

"No thanks" should be enough--I believe the only people that will ask for more explanation have their own issues. It's boundary busting, in my opinion, to question you when you have turned down a drink. It's just not coming from someone that's healthy enough to respect what you just said without hearing your PERSONAL PRIVATE REASON (S)--which, belong to you and only you!!!

No is a complete sentence, dang it!

Notmyrealname

Tell them you are working out and eating right, and you'd rather have the freedom to eat 750 calories worth of tasty food than have to find space in your diet for 750 calories of liver disease. Of course, we don't want to lie to people, right? so you'll probably want to actually be working out and watching what you eat, and that way you stay honest. Win - win - win situation.

DisplacedGRITS

i suppose i'm lucky in that i've moved to a new place and am in the process of making new friends. i am simply the girl that doesn't drink! as for old friends, everyone knows. i talk about it on facebook so when i say everyone i mean EVERYONE. i guess that even means my grandpa and all my aunts and uncles and cousins who friended me. ah well. in for a penny, in for a pound. i'm not terribly ashamed of it. millions of people suffer from it. i chose to do something about it.

"personal reasons" is a good excuse. if someone prys after you tell them "it's personal" then what the hell kind of friend are they? i don't care to drink tonight. it's not a big deal. if it's a big deal to them, then it's their problem and maybe it's a problem to them. we get that as alcoholics in recovery. our decision to cease drinking makes people think about their drinking habits and some people don't like thinking about that. there are many threads here about non-drinkers having to deal with people in their lives who actually rebel against someone's decision to stop drinking.

what's important is to remember that you've decided to stop drinking for yourself. you cannot change how people perceive that. the only people who see it as a big deal are the people who it's a big deal to and that's usually alcoholics. that's why it's a big deal to us.