carvel

Just dropped off the wife and kids at airport. They are touring Europe and will be gone til the end of July. I didn't go because of other commitments and a scheduled job interview next week. I'd been "planning" a bender for the last couple of days with their departure (additive voice has been in overdrive lately knowing that this will be the chance to "cut loose").

Stopped at the booze store but didn't go in... came back to the house and got on SR.

I'm on day 46 of abstinence and almost reset to zero. I know this is going to be a big test for me since I'll have a lot of time on my hands (unemployed).

The urge to drink abated when I got online to SR.... I was reminded of the awful memories of detoxing and what booze does to me. I'll stay busy doing constructive behaviors and leave the bottle alone.

Thanks again for all the support that is generously given on this forum!

carvel

Keva

Great job, Carvel!!! I am glad you came here instead

Change4good

Very nice!!

We finished a long bike ride with the kids, and had lunch at a place on the water we always go afterwards. I normally love a cold beer. My husband had one. I had water with lemon.

And part of what helped me was knowing I was going to come back here read SR.

sobermrsc

Way to go!

Dee74

great decision Carvel - keep it up

D

Hevyn

Carvel, that is amazing. I remember looking forward to times like that - being left alone to do whatever I pleased. They always ended up being a disappointment - empty days spent in a fog, not really remembering what I did. You won't miss a thing - and you got over a huge hurdle. Proud of you!

IndaMiricale

Awesome job coming on SR.

I had a hard time when left alone to my own world also. Many relapses when that happened, so well done on your reaction.

sissy07

Carvel,

That is awesome. This disease absolutely amazes me...not in a good way.

TTBABP

Good for you! Good luck with the interview!!

fairenough

Good for you!! I'm unemployed/underemployed (work on-call maybe 2x/mo) and know what that can do. Big congrats on the upcoming interview. Those seem hard to come by these days. Come back to SR whenever that urge hits. We're here!

Live2Run25

That's great!! =)

freshstart57

I heard once, 'The measure of a person is what he does when no one is looking'. I used to just HATE that because I knew exactly what I wanted to do. I wanted to numb, to get lost, to be 'bad', I dunno what you want to call it.

What is different for me now? I am not sure. I have too many things to do now, that's one thing. I don't like the idea of wasting an entire day being wasted anymore, and I certainly won't tolerate that empty ashamed feeling afterwards. It took several months for me to start to fill my 'dance card' again, and it was really pretty easy to do once I got going. Sorta like getting sober, eh?

Sentso

Really nice to read that!

I know how hard it is when you're on your own.
Actually when I'm home, I find it helpful to talk out loud about my plans for the day. I just started doing that, and though it may sound weird from the outside (!), it helps me see things clearly when I say to myself: "ok now I'm gonna go running, and then I'll have a shower, and then I have this paperwork to do, and then I can sit and read for an hour, etc."
And keeping an eye on SR will definitely help!