staying sober without AA after being in and out, in and out
non-drinker
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Milwaukee, Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 13,841
I'm now over 3 years happily sober with no "program". I do get face-to-face support from a few family members and close friends, and also SR. Whatever you decide, I wish you the best.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
We have this debate a lot here and I think what get's lost here is that AA is a lot more than putting down the drink. It's a program that is a design for living without alcohol....Happy, joyous and free. I'm sure there are a lot of people that can quit drinking and the problem is solved.....For millions of alcoholics....Myself being one of them...This isn't the case.....I know when I put down the drink....The problem remained. Me...I needed to clear the wreckage of my past.....Right my wrongs....Get myself into fit spritual condition....And help the next sick and suffering alcoholic that I can. It's a 12 step program and alcohol is only mentioned in the first step.
We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed.
That's it for me....I can't drink like a normal person. Case closed. Now I got to get back to work on my living problem.
We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed.
That's it for me....I can't drink like a normal person. Case closed. Now I got to get back to work on my living problem.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Canada. About as far south as you can get
Posts: 4,768
Originally Posted by fiske 
For whatever reason, AA has consistently caused me to feel a lot of shame and to really beat myself up if I slip--causing me to just fall into a horrible binge. I I've tried this and lost every year for the past 7. I also feel like it's hard to have relationships that are close with local AAers that I do relate to as I've disappointed them again and again. I'm thinking of trying this board as a way to check in and keep myself on track--I need to find another way outside of the 12 steps to stay sober that works for me. Any advice from folks that have been able to stay sober without AA?
I think you have to commit to AA... not just be around or involved.
You know the difference between involved and committed??
Like a bacon & egg breakfast...... The chicken is involved and the pig is committed.
I wish you the best of luck.
Bob R.
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
Welcome Fisk to SR, I know your thread is a couple months old now, hope you are doing well these days. Relapsepro? Glad you found us, there is a lot of support for you here at SR.
There are a lot of us here that have gotten sober and stayed that way without AA. That can't come as any surprise, because most people who get sober do it without any program at all. AA is a godsend for a great many people, but for others like me, it was never going to happen.
AVRT makes no claims about improvements in your spiritual health, you may need to fix that stuff or not, I dunno, that is only for you to decide. But it provides a way for you to make a bulletproof barrier against ever drinking again. There is more info at the Rational Recovery website, and a great ongoing discussion on the Secular Connections forum.
There are more alternatives than these, too. No matter what route you choose, success will only be found if there is a determination to never drink again.
There are a lot of us here that have gotten sober and stayed that way without AA. That can't come as any surprise, because most people who get sober do it without any program at all. AA is a godsend for a great many people, but for others like me, it was never going to happen.
AVRT makes no claims about improvements in your spiritual health, you may need to fix that stuff or not, I dunno, that is only for you to decide. But it provides a way for you to make a bulletproof barrier against ever drinking again. There is more info at the Rational Recovery website, and a great ongoing discussion on the Secular Connections forum.
There are more alternatives than these, too. No matter what route you choose, success will only be found if there is a determination to never drink again.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
Originally Posted by freshstart57
There are a lot of us here that have gotten sober and stayed that way without AA. That can't come as any surprise, because most people who get sober do it without any program at all. AA is a godsend for a great many people, but for others like me, it was never going to happen.
AVRT makes no claims about improvements in your spiritual health, you may need to fix that stuff or not, I dunno, that is only for you to decide. But it provides a way for you to make a bulletproof barrier against ever drinking again. There is more info at the Rational Recovery website, and a great ongoing discussion on the Secular Connections forum.
There are more alternatives than these, too. No matter what route you choose, success will only be found if there is a determination to never drink again.
AVRT makes no claims about improvements in your spiritual health, you may need to fix that stuff or not, I dunno, that is only for you to decide. But it provides a way for you to make a bulletproof barrier against ever drinking again. There is more info at the Rational Recovery website, and a great ongoing discussion on the Secular Connections forum.
There are more alternatives than these, too. No matter what route you choose, success will only be found if there is a determination to never drink again.
I think anybody that doesn't pick up a drink has a bulletproof barrier against drinking again. I had a guy who is celebrating 50 years in AA give me this bit of advice.
If you don't have a drink...You'll never need a drink.
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