A humbled return.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: England
Posts: 405
A humbled return.
Hello,
I took a hiatus as I was not 'done' with the booze. I had some time without the booze and it was great, I went back to drinking and posted some stupid things, probably out of frsutration for my incapacity to not drink if want to reason. So I left as it is a recovery room.
I'm kind of posting for myself really this time if that's ok, I'm checking in and I will check in daily to stop this drinking. My situation has changed. Formally I was a medical professional in Hong Kong that has returned to be unemployed in the UK. My dad (who I had returned to) has now had a heart attack and my former girlfriend has given up on me. I do not have enough national insurance contribution for social security so I am effectively homeless without a soul that gives a damn that I am here.
I am going to have to find strength and start beleiving in myself as there is nobody left that beleives in me. I am going to find positives in anything,this has been a learning experience. It is no longer an option to have negative thoughts about myself. I feel like I can tackle anyhting if I can overcome these despairing feelings without alcohol. I am going to check in daily on this thread as goal and take this day by day. Without booze.
I took a hiatus as I was not 'done' with the booze. I had some time without the booze and it was great, I went back to drinking and posted some stupid things, probably out of frsutration for my incapacity to not drink if want to reason. So I left as it is a recovery room.
I'm kind of posting for myself really this time if that's ok, I'm checking in and I will check in daily to stop this drinking. My situation has changed. Formally I was a medical professional in Hong Kong that has returned to be unemployed in the UK. My dad (who I had returned to) has now had a heart attack and my former girlfriend has given up on me. I do not have enough national insurance contribution for social security so I am effectively homeless without a soul that gives a damn that I am here.
I am going to have to find strength and start beleiving in myself as there is nobody left that beleives in me. I am going to find positives in anything,this has been a learning experience. It is no longer an option to have negative thoughts about myself. I feel like I can tackle anyhting if I can overcome these despairing feelings without alcohol. I am going to check in daily on this thread as goal and take this day by day. Without booze.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Murfreesboro, TN
Posts: 12
Finding a higher power and local contacts can help a lot. I'm not sure of the resources in your area but here there are places that offer a living area and direction in early recovery. I look forward to hearing from you again soon!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,474
Originally Posted by JimJim 
I am going to have to find strength and start beleiving in myself as there is nobody left that beleives in me.
I'm glad you're back. You can do this!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: England
Posts: 405
Hey people thank you for your replies,
I have found an AA meeting tommorrow evening. I feel despairing and it will be good to just be around some people. I really don't have anything to lose.
I have found an AA meeting tommorrow evening. I feel despairing and it will be good to just be around some people. I really don't have anything to lose.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,531
JimJim! So glad you are back. We have faith in your ability to kick this thing. I'm so sorry for your circumstances, but maybe this is leading you to a better life. Sometimes, dramatic and tragic things have to happen to force us to see the truth. I know that was true for me.
We're here whenever you want to discuss anything - and we are on your side always.
We're here whenever you want to discuss anything - and we are on your side always.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Canada. About as far south as you can get
Posts: 4,768
Originally Posted by JimJim
Hey people thank you for your replies,
I have found an AA meeting tommorrow evening. I feel despairing and it will be good to just be around some people. I really don't have anything to lose.
I have found an AA meeting tommorrow evening. I feel despairing and it will be good to just be around some people. I really don't have anything to lose.
All the best.
Bob R
Recoveringed
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Thump
Posts: 409
Originally Posted by JimJim
Hey people thank you for your replies,
I have found an AA meeting tommorrow evening. I feel despairing and it will be good to just be around some people. I really don't have anything to lose.
I have found an AA meeting tommorrow evening. I feel despairing and it will be good to just be around some people. I really don't have anything to lose.
Recovering
Join Date: May 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 1,361
Hey Jim,
It seems a curse of modern society that people move around with jobs, but then lose their support structure. I'm in the South West of the UK and we see a lot of that down here - people come to retire and then when a partner dies the other is left bereft, alone and lonely. The churches are helping, but many (especially younger people) now feel distanced from the church as well.
Glad you're looking to lift yourself out of the drink. I'm sure things will get better as you start to get settled back in the UK again.
It seems a curse of modern society that people move around with jobs, but then lose their support structure. I'm in the South West of the UK and we see a lot of that down here - people come to retire and then when a partner dies the other is left bereft, alone and lonely. The churches are helping, but many (especially younger people) now feel distanced from the church as well.
Glad you're looking to lift yourself out of the drink. I'm sure things will get better as you start to get settled back in the UK again.
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