Duke10

I am having a real conflict. My mom called me Sat am because my dad was asking for me. He is dying and wanted to see me. I thought he would want to beg for forgiveness for the mental, physical and sexual abuse. Lets just say he would bring guys home from the bar and I had to pay his bar tab. Instead he just said he was done fighting. I kind of wished he would just close his eyes and die. He has been sober for 20 years and I have tried to make my peace but I am conflicted.

Impurrfect

((Duke)) - I'm so sorry, I can't imagine what feelings you are going through. Lots and lots of hugs and prayers,

Amy

Dee74

I'm sorry Duke.
Prayers for you and your family.

D

sober4myboys

That is terrible, I understand wanting an apology. I am so sorry for you, prayers.

regeneration

Aw Duke, I'm so sorry to hear about what happened to you. You must be having so many different feelings going on at the moment.

Thoughts are with you.

Sasha4

Duke.......sending you love xxxx

Hevyn

I'm thinking of you, too Duke. It's hard not to be bitter and angry over such things. Yet we can't live our lives in peace if we don't let go of certain thoughts. I hope you will be able to let go of the sadness, and reach for a better day.

aussieblue

So sorry you had to go through that.Thinking of you.

flutter

Hugs to you, Duke. Do what you feel is best for YOU.

Change4good

Oh Duke... Hugs to you. I agree with Flutter. Do what is best for you. I am sending prayers to you and your family.

Hollyanne

Duke,
I hear you loud and clear.
Mind yourself. Do what you are comfortable with only.
Remember, different generation. Not quite as "enlightened".
Probably doesn't remember the half of it.
Keep working on you.
:ghug3

SSIL75

My goodness, duke that poor little boy. How your heart must break for who you were

Pretty sure I'd not forgive that. Although I hear forgiveness is for the living. For your own peace.

Hugs to you during this time.

Michael66

Hey Duke,

I can hardly begin to think what that must be like.

You're in my prayers buddy. God bless you.

Live2Run25

So sorry for you. Thinking of you!

GiGi13

I wont pretend to know what you have been through in the least...the only thing that I can say, my advice would be... "forgive him"... not for HIM..but for YOU!.. Living with scars is bad enough..but what truly will eat away at a person is living with hate in your heart.. granting him forgiveness is like letting go of the aweful things that happened to you..and again..you wouldnt be doing it for HIM..you would be doing it for yourself!!!! Maybe say something like "Dad, i forgive you..I forgive you because i cant live with the hate inside me anymore..and i have to let it go...i have a good life ahead of me and i cant move forward with it if i cling to the past...so for my own benefit..i forgive you"... just my 2 cents.... best of luck and im sorry for your situation.

Bruno1979

I'm sorry to hear that terrible story Duke,

Without dragging the past up does your mother know what went on?

Take care mate,

Bruno.

DoinThis

Duke I'm so sad for you. Can u ask your dad for an apology, say u want to forgive him but that's the only way u can? Or would it be too risky to get an answer u don't want. How about asking your therapist for advice? I wish u all the best with however u handle this. X

ttbp

Thinking of you xxx

LoftyIdeals

Duke...you have my thoughts and prayers for peace in your life now. Go with God.

RobbyRobot

Sorry, Duke. How sad. You'll be a better man having been tempered through the fires of your heartfelt conflict. I hope for you every good measure of strength and forgiveness in loving both your parents and family at this important time. Be well.