plshelp1

Hello and thanks to everyone for your wisdom and advice in advance. I've been clean know for 8 months after a 10 plus year prescription med habit. For 4 months I was locked up after a domestic violence dispute with my wife. The last 4 months I've been in a long term rehab with 2 months remaining before I leave. The rehab i'm in is a faith based organization and I feel like it's really changed my life and truly God has come into my life. The program is very intense for the first 2 months with daily classes then you go into a work release program afterwards. Instead of going to work after the 8 weeks I was asked to work at the rehab as a staff aid and agreed to do so. The staff here are great and helped me beyond means but I feel like I'm know going backwards. We do some classes throughout the week but nothing that I can say is helping me in my recovery at this point. The staff has been good to me and I don't want to make them mad or put them in a situation by telling them I'm at a stand still. They depend on me to help run the operation and I don't want to put them in a bind. I feel like for me to go forward I need to do more AA/NA meetings to go forward. I'd tossed the idea around of transferring to another facility after the 6 months that had a really intense phase of transitional living where you are required to attend a minimum of 5 meetings per week. That said, I feel like I need it know and not 2 months down the road. Would it be selfish on my part to try and leave this program early? They've been so kind and helpful to me and I feel like I need to stay as a way to give back what's been given to me. Idea's and suggestions are welcomed. Thanks.

Anna

Hi and Welcome,

I'm glad you're doing well and working on your recovery. I think, in the end, you need to do what's right for you. Of course you have gratitude for the help you've received, but you must have your own needs met as well.

riggedgame

I think the one thing we would both agree on is that your sobriety, at this point in your addiction, absolutely must come first. If anyone should understand your putting your sobriety before all else, it should be the people you work with at your current facility.

Whatever it takes. I think once you've started the final phase of addiction, when death/insanity/jail are a real, current risk in your life, worrying about hurting other peoples' feelings doing whatever it takes to be sober is not an issue.

It sounds like you've gotten past what trips up so many people: the inability to admit you need help, and intensive help, and now. I say go: move forward, boldly, with all the commitment in your heart, towards sobriety.

plshelp1

I'm truly concerned due to the fact that I see myself going backwards at this point. Bad thoughts and way's of the past are starting to enter my mind more each day. I didn't think this would become an issue until recently but it has.

Live2Run25

I think you should be honest with them. Like others have said, they of all people should understand that. Best of luck to you.