So where do I begin?
So where do I begin?
It's the start of day 2 for me of sobriety. I've been taking xanax to keep the detoxing to a minimum. I had been drinking a pint of vodka every day for about 6 years..im 36 now. Xanax was prescribed to me by my doctor a year ago for severe anxiety disorder. its a low dose..only .25 mg 1x a day. Trust me i dont abuse it...a month supply of 30 pills lasts me 6 months...
Ive been through this before when i tried to sober up... by the next morning the shakes and heart palps are so bad i would take a xanax and do that for a few days in a row and it would help....then after a week of no xanax nor alcohol, i would feel...hmm..got over it this time..i can drink again and just drink..less.....and thus the pattern begins!.. from the moment i would open my eyes until i closed them at night...was sipping that bottle through the day. some days more then others.
It was as though I could not feel normal until i had a few sips in me and the shakes would stop. I wasnt getting drunk..just keeping enough in me to keep the alcohol there to make me feel stable...but i hated wakeing up and feeling this haze over me...nothing looked real..it was ...i cant explain it.
I pray this is the last time i attempt this because i want to succeed!!.. the final straw was when i would wake...take a few sips which i always chased down with water...and it just kept coming back up. 3 days in a row of throwing up..then the pains started in my right upper stomach...i've heard your liver can hurt from this?.. then a very odd thing... my urine has been orange for 3 days now..it seems to be lightening up a bit on and off now...but ive also heard that it can be a sign of liver damage....i have also heard though, that the liver can repair itself...im hoping withing a few days or weeks this orange urine goes away.. has anyone ever heard of this before?
Ive been through this before when i tried to sober up... by the next morning the shakes and heart palps are so bad i would take a xanax and do that for a few days in a row and it would help....then after a week of no xanax nor alcohol, i would feel...hmm..got over it this time..i can drink again and just drink..less.....and thus the pattern begins!.. from the moment i would open my eyes until i closed them at night...was sipping that bottle through the day. some days more then others.
It was as though I could not feel normal until i had a few sips in me and the shakes would stop. I wasnt getting drunk..just keeping enough in me to keep the alcohol there to make me feel stable...but i hated wakeing up and feeling this haze over me...nothing looked real..it was ...i cant explain it.
I pray this is the last time i attempt this because i want to succeed!!.. the final straw was when i would wake...take a few sips which i always chased down with water...and it just kept coming back up. 3 days in a row of throwing up..then the pains started in my right upper stomach...i've heard your liver can hurt from this?.. then a very odd thing... my urine has been orange for 3 days now..it seems to be lightening up a bit on and off now...but ive also heard that it can be a sign of liver damage....i have also heard though, that the liver can repair itself...im hoping withing a few days or weeks this orange urine goes away.. has anyone ever heard of this before?
I have not seen my doctor as of yet about my alcohol abuse. But he knows of my severe anxiety. I have NEVER drank and taken a xanax at the same time i assure you. My father was an alcoholic when he was alive and his doctor too prescribed for him first xanax..then switched him to...librium i believe? I have heard of people being prescribed these meds as a form of detox to help ease the transition.
I've heard that it can be dangerous to detox on your own. Maybe you could see your doctor about the alcohol abuse and tell him your concerns.
BTW, welcome! Keep us posted on how you're doing, and take care of yourself!
BTW, welcome! Keep us posted on how you're doing, and take care of yourself!
Welcome GiGi!
First of all, congratulations for getting through that first day! Day 2 was the hardest for me, I think, but I kept reading on this forum and holding on to the support and inspiration I found here. Things really will get better.
I agree with the others about seeing a doctor. It's all so scary, I know, but I've always found that others respond with understanding and compassion when we reach out for help. :ghug3
First of all, congratulations for getting through that first day! Day 2 was the hardest for me, I think, but I kept reading on this forum and holding on to the support and inspiration I found here. Things really will get better.
I agree with the others about seeing a doctor. It's all so scary, I know, but I've always found that others respond with understanding and compassion when we reach out for help. :ghug3
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