When your whole life is still a trigger...
 

Where do you begin? There is so much I can't change because of the consequences of years of choices, so now what? If my whole day, my whole life- if I myself am the trigger- then how does recovery work? Can you not drink even when your whole life is a trigger ?

Are you involved in any kind of recovery program or therapy?

Welcome back effortjoy :)

I felt the same way - there was no way I could life my life without drinking and no way I could not drink in my life as it was.

The solution for me was to change my life.
Recovery was that important for me.

That doesn't mean you need to leave your family or quit your job or anything - it does mean you have to take a good look at your priorities though I think...

If there's something more important than you getting sober then you're making a pretty hard road for yourself I think?

D

You can just decide to stop. It is that simple and yet an extremely difficult thing to do. Once the decision is made, you find tools to help you cope. Once you are sober a while you can look at your life and see what is really going on and try to mend what's broken. While I was drinking I could not evaluate my life in a rational way.

When we are drinking we are our own worst enemy. Alcohol can sabotage any glimmer of hope you are able to muster. Take out the alcohol and that hope is able to grow. It is a slow process, but since I have quit, I have never felt the pain and anguish that I felt my last day of drinking.

Best wishes effortjoy

Some triggers are obvious (going to bars, having alcohol in the house, etc.) but I think that most of my problem was in my head.......wanting to do it all, thinking I had to be perfect, trying to make everyone happy. I was always stressed, always engaging in negative self-talk.

To stay sober, I had to find some inner peace and stop taking on the world. That meant accepting and loving myself and honoring my feelings/needs. It's not easy at first, but I started with the small stuff, like saying "SO, the house isn't clean - so what? I'm sober today - good job!"

Bottom line, I guess, is that if you can identify what triggers you, you can start making changes. Be patient with yourself and remember to take it one day (one trigger) at a time.:ghug3

That's a great question. I guess I just kind of accepted that I would be feeling the gravitational pull for a while. I planned for them, and had a whole set of counter measures in place—coming to SR, going for a walk, taking a drive, hitting the gym, eating a big meal, etc.

It's not easy at first, but you'll be really grateful you toughed it out. Life is a million times better once you break free of its pull. You'll get there!