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Flying worries

Old 06-16-2012, 02:48 AM
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Flying worries

Good Morning all from windy England.

Tomorrow I am flying off to Spain and it will be the first time I have flown without having a drink for many years and am a bit scared to say the least. I have been sober for 75 days and am one month out of a treatment centre. I booked this holiday after coming home from treatment. My therapist thinks its a bad idea and that I am setting myself up to fail. I have no desire to drink I just want to get away for a break. I am going with a friend who has promised not to drink for the whole trip and we have hired a villa in the mountains so no bar in sight.

What I want to ask is has anyone else in early recovery been away and if so any tips or advice for me would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you all.

Ally
x
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Old 06-16-2012, 02:53 AM
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i see in yer profile yer reading the big book. have you looked into meetings in the area yer goin? take yer BB with ya and keep yer higher power in control.


and yes, i flew out to see my son graduate basic training for the army. 1s time i ever flew and 1st time out of michigan. took my BB, prayed like crazy, and went to a few meetings and had a great time for the week.
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Old 06-16-2012, 02:56 AM
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Hi and thanks yes there is a meeting about half an hour away which I will go to and I have just loaded the big book on my ipod. I think its the flight that worries me as I am so nervous and also the reactions from my thearapist. I am a people pleaser and feel I have let him down by booking this trip in early recovery when its not recommended, but to me I just want to feel normal and do normal things.
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Old 06-16-2012, 03:02 AM
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you may want to get away for a break, but dont forget that wherever ya go, there you are.
i personally had an awesome time on the flights to and from. 1st time flying,too!! man!! that was awesome!!! lookin out the window made me see just what a small part of this world i am.

this could very well be a good time to "practice these principles in all your affairs"
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Old 06-16-2012, 03:08 AM
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All I can say is that I did maybe 3 years ago. I "decided" a week before going on holiday that I wasn't drinking and told my wife as much (the real reason that I "decided" was that I'd gotten drunk, gotten into trouble in a bar and was scared/embarassed/suicidal/humiliated etc). My wife was astounded when I told her and even more astounded when I didn't drink.

Can say it was super easy but before going I was quite determined and the best thing was how great I felt about not drinking every morning when I woke up. The holiday was not dictated by my drinking and was thus relaxing also.

I felt so good and proud about myself when I came home.




As for my I'm flying back to the UK later this year and I won't be drinking. I've made sure of this by arranging to pick up a rental car at the airport. I'll have my kids with me so I won't let myself mess it up.
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Old 06-16-2012, 03:09 AM
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lol good point about taking myself.

I will try that when I am flying, I never thought about that before.

Thank you.
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Old 06-16-2012, 03:30 AM
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hey positivelady... i went away at about 55 days.. I'm now at 3 months.

It was okay. I did feel an air of general irritation at times. that's because I need to let go of things more/sort out other areas of life (which I'm doing).

There were no meetings where I was, and I couldn't get wireless to work for online meetings...

I just got it clear in my head I wouldn't drink, and also looked out for negative aspects of drinking while there. If you're meeting other people... you'll find plenty. My friend would say "ooh, I'm going to reward myself with a wine". And in my head I'd be thinking "for what? You've just walked up a volcano in one of the most beautiful countries in the world, that is a reward in itself". And others would say "ooh, it's beer o'clock" after we'd been touring on a ship looking at beautiful views. It stopped me romanticising drink as something enjoyable.

I'd make sure you either have printed materials or stuff on a laptop to look at as reminders. I read info on relapse triggers, symptoms etc. I also had the number of someone who I speak to on another board and he texted me.

I also reminded myself (and still do) of euphoric recall. Link here, look in the change of thinking section:

Levels of Relapse Warning Signs

I needed to write down my own version euphoric recall as mine is a slower descent than that but the reasons why I shouldn't drink are strong.

Anyway.. to sum-up.. have a plan in place. Read, bring stuff with you to read, have contacts, see if you can get to a meeting. And remind yourself you don't need drink to enjoy yourself, a lot of others are fooling themselves.
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Old 06-16-2012, 04:12 AM
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And one thing I forgot...you know when you're on holiday and it's the end of a nice day.. there might be one time when you see someone having a nice, chilled, glass of booze. And you think.. "I want that". You know what I found, it's often just the nice, chilled aspect that's tempting. Now at home when I'm really thirsty or hot (rare in the UK at the moment, with all this rain) I realise that's all it is. I have ice cubes and relax. It's usually sparkling water with grape or orange juice. Same on holiday. I honestly used to think recovering alcoholics were lying when they said they enjoyed soft drinks just as much, I realise that's not the truth now. I had plenty of fresh juices when away and sparkling water, I didn't miss out, it was just re-framing it all and realising I enjoyed nice cool drinks.
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Old 06-16-2012, 11:40 AM
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Is it your usual kind of holiday Abby? It sounds like you are doing something different and it sounds like a good sober break. Why is your therapist worried?

Be a bit careful because the desire to drink can occur quite suddenly. I got a ton of cravings when the weather got nice here (for that one and a half weeks!) so be prepared in case they do happen. Let us know how you get on x
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Old 06-16-2012, 12:31 PM
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Thank you both for all your advice, its a newish type of holiday for me but away from crowds so lots of mountain air. I think my therapist is worried as he relasped on holiday but I am not him. I just love to travel its a passion of mine. I guess what upsets me is being told don't go on holiday in the first year, don't have a relationship but I just want to feel normal and do normal things and not isolate as I was doing in my drinking days.

I will keep you posted how I get on and once again thanks I am so glad I found this site
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