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Old 06-13-2012, 08:18 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Well...


My name's Chris. And I'm an alcoholic.

I don't want to get too far into the details of my life right now (I feel that, providing I'm accepted by the community, it's something I can gradually release). But things have slowly been going wrong for years, up until March. After that, things got significantly worse.

I've been drinking tonight. I've had little money left for months, but that doesn't concern me. I've not got any children (thankfully, since I've grown up around this), but a now-ex girlfriend who I don't want back.

This post is somewhat jumbled. It's probably the worst introductory post I've ever made.

I'm going to go bum a cigarette now. I'll be back momentarily.
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Old 06-13-2012, 08:19 PM   #2 (permalink)
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I should've previewed that post. Wow.
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Old 06-13-2012, 08:21 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Hey Chris...welcome to SR. It sounds like your bottoming out. Did things get bad because of your drinking?
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Old 06-13-2012, 08:23 PM   #4 (permalink)
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glad yer here and glad ya didnt preview and edit.
soooo, ya want som help with the problem of alcoholism? if so yer in a good place.
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Old 06-13-2012, 08:24 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Hi chris, welcome! This site is great. I know you will like it.
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Old 06-13-2012, 08:39 PM   #6 (permalink)
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My story's somewhat complicated, but to have this many people reply to an introductory post in the several moments I've been away from the computer before leaving the house... this definitely does seem like a good place.

I'd say my drinking has played a major factor in my downward spiral. Though I've been unhappy with things for years. And once I get the change to deal with one issue, another significantly worse one pops up. And it's been this way for years.

I'll be honest, if wasn't almost completely broke and scared, I wouldn't have done this. I tried AA once, and was committed with it. Until I saw my partner out around two weeks later hitting on me without recognising who I was. (honestly, I'm not kidding).
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Old 06-13-2012, 08:41 PM   #7 (permalink)
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I did write a long post thanking everybody for replying so quickly, but it vanished due to one of vBulletin's sever errors.

I'll rewrite it shortly though - I'm going for a cigarerre right now.

Thanks to everybody for their immediate support though - you don't get this in other places.
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Old 06-13-2012, 08:43 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Alright, three post attempts later and I'm spent. (I keep geting vBulletin errors everytime while forgetting to copy the posts). I'll post shortly after I have a cigarette (it's been 20 MINUTES since I tried to pop a quick thankyou post down).

I guess I'm just majorly unhappy. My life's been somewhat complex (hasn't everyone's?), so I'll try and gradually work through it.
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Old 06-13-2012, 08:44 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Haha, they all posted without my knowledge. Wow. Stupid me...
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Old 06-13-2012, 08:46 PM   #10 (permalink)
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I would not have gotten sober if I had not been fired from my job, slammed into the back of a 18 wheeler while drinking, pissed away most of my savings, ran up massive debt...the list goes on. I had enough. I had problems that were not alcohol related, but as long as I was drinking I had one huge problem that made my life worse by degrees. Alcohol never gave me anything, only took away from me.
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Old 06-13-2012, 08:48 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Welcome Chris....I didn't really understand why AA didn't work for you?
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Old 06-13-2012, 08:48 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Haha, they all posted without my knowledge. Wow. Stupid me...
I think the servers are being updated....no worries.
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Old 06-13-2012, 08:49 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Hey RisingStar, welcome!!
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Old 06-13-2012, 09:00 PM   #14 (permalink)
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I would not have gotten sober if I had not been fiired from my job, slammed into the back of a 18 wheeler while drinking, pissed iaway most of my savings, ran up massive debt...the list goes on. I had enough. I had problems that were not alcohol related, but as long as I was drinking I had one huge problem that made my life worse by degrees. Alcohol never gave me anything, only took away from me.
I've blown all my money too. Though friends haven't called me for a long time. I've always tried to make myself available and I've said I'd be up for pretty much whatever. But nobody's ever even tried to get in contact with me. I think going out, even if it's my last 10 or so, gives me the social interaction I want. It's not that I'm bad socially or anything.

I think this is one of those problems which might get slightly worse while dealing it before it gets better.

And the reason why AA didn't work was because the people who supported me and the people who gave me strength were actually drinking behind the backs of people who attended the meetings religiously. I kind of lost faith in those people after that (though the way I was out drinking that night pretty much contradicted the fact I sought help).
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Old 06-13-2012, 09:02 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Sorry for using your quote as a post by the way, gunther84. I think I tried to respond to a couple of posts at the same time there.
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Old 06-13-2012, 09:06 PM   #16 (permalink)
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And the reason why AA didn't work was because the people who supported me and the people who gave me strength were actually drinking behind the backs of people who attended the meetings religiously. I kind of lost faith in those people after that (though the way I was out drinking that night pretty much contradicted the fact I sought help).
I didn't go to AA to have other people control how I got sober...I hung around people that got it right and followed their suggestions...Maybe you should try some different meetings...Or choose who you hang around with better....If you just don't connect with the program...Try something else....All I know about AA is it worked for me...I went in there looking for something to work....And it did.
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Old 06-13-2012, 09:21 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Welcome Risingstar,
I drank myself right to rock-bottom. Lost my career, my gf, my car, my house, my drivers license....etc. I sobered up last year and I am back on the right track. I am still broke and have none of the material things I used to, but I am happier now than I have been in 15 years. Try life without the booze and things will get better. I promise you.
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Old 06-13-2012, 09:23 PM   #18 (permalink)
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I didn't go to AA to have other people control how I got sober...I hung around people that got it right and followed their suggestions...Maybe you should try some different meetings...Or choose who you hang around with better....If you just don't connect with the program...Try something else....All I know about AA is it worked for me...I went in there looking for something to work....And it did.
I suppose it depends on the sort of person you are, the stage in life you're at and the people who attend the meetings. If you've got all three, which many people do, then everything's fine. I don't have all three (though I could be blaming them for my recent relapse instead of myself), though I'll get through it.

Kind of don't know where to even start dealing with my problems though.
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Old 06-13-2012, 09:33 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Kind of don't know where to even start dealing with my problems though.
You're drinking tonight...I'd guess stopping would be the best place to start...I don't see how you blame anybody for relapsing...Unless they poured it down your throat. Maybe AA is not for you...I'd look into something to assist you in getting sober....It's not a matter of needing to do it...It's pretty important that you want to do it...Look into AVRT...SMART..Something....I assume you being here...Drinking or not means you want to quit.
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Old 06-13-2012, 09:45 PM   #20 (permalink)
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You're drinking tonight...I'd guess stopping would be the best place to start...I don't see how you blame anybody for relapsing...Unless they poured it down your throat. Maybe AA is not for you...I'd look into something to assist you in getting sober....It's not a matter of needing to do it...It's pretty important that you want to do it...Look into AVRT...SMART..Something....I assume you being here...Drinking or not means you want to quit.
I can't really blame anybody for relapsing, except the hand that life dealt me.

I haven't drank since an hour or so before I made my initial post (and even so, my drinking tonight's been very tame). I've barely drank in the last couple of weeks, but that's only because the financial and practical restraints have been in place. I'm legitimately taking steps to change. I'm just feeling bad that AA, at the stage in life I was at, wasn't something to cure me. Especially when I saw two of the most prominent people in the meetings getting drunks.
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