CarolD

I suggest you ask a friend to go with you to the next meeting
you plan to attend.

Some new people do that for awhile....no eyebrows will be raised...

Luling...I'm pleased you are willing to explore AA ..it works best
when you actually get out of your car...

IndaMiricale

I look forward to hearing how it went for you,everyone has those jitters about facing something like this. I can only say for me after I finally walked thru I only laughed at myself for being so scared. Its now my home please join us.

Sapling

You kill me.

Luling

Lol -- thanks for the tip; I'll have to try that.

Payton

I wish we could go together!!! I am also nervous but interested. Please tell me how it goes. I have no one to watch my child so my times to go are limited, but I want to go next week in the evening, I think. I think this will be great for you!

hypochondriac

I did what Heath said Luling. I met someone outside and they introduced me to a few people, I was made to feel incredibly welcome! I have never been remotely nervous going back, that's how scary its not Oh and I wouldn't have made it there without my little shove from Jeni too Phone the helpline, I don't see why you shouldn't have a little help getting through the door x

Luling

Can you just hop on a plane heading for Houston? I'll pick you up from the airport and we'll go.

I'll definitely let you know how it goes.

sugarbear1

I don't know if AA can help you yet. Why not look into Rational Recovery, AVRT, SMART or Women for Recovery? They may be able to help you!

Luling

Why wouldn't AA be able to help me? Do I need to be sober for longer?

Edit: Am I somehow "not ready" for AA's help? I'm trying to be open minded to all of my options over here, and I need to do something. I don't understand ...

desertsong

Luling, I totally relate to where you are. My first AA meeting ... wow. I thought I was going to come out of my skin. Thankfully, I was brought there by a lady I talked to on the AA hotline when I was totally desperate for help (she is now my sponsor). If she hadn't come to pick me up and take me there, I'm not sure I would have gone.

Now my daily meetings are a lifeline for me. I look forward to them the way I used to look forward to my Jack Daniels.

Do you have a trusted friend who can go with you to your first meeting? I guarantee you, once you get the first one "under your belt," the rest are pretty easy.

Luling

I don't know. Maybe I need to think about this a while longer.

heath480

LULING yes AA can help you,it has helped me stay sober a day at a time since my first meeting.

My story is similair to desertsong,after I called the helpline I was put in contact with a lady in my area,I spoke with her on the phone,she met me outside the meeting,she became my sponsor and took me through the 12 steps,she is still my sponsor today 9years later.

I wish you well.

Luling

Okay. I wish you would have explained a little , but it's cool. I think I'll try AA anyway. Thanks though.

pinkdog

Hi. To me it was a big step going to that first meeting too. I built it up in my mind so large. when I actually went it was me and another sitting in the parking lot wondering if the meeting was cancelled. By the time the others came, we had bonded. Maybe you can go early and talk to someone before the rest get there. It helped me ease into it. I'm really glad I went.

changer

luling- i was so freaked out about going to my first meeting- and the honest truth is, you may feel that way the whole meeting. i found that by experimenting with different meetings, i've met the greatest group of people! i can honestly say i love hitting the meetings, and having such a broad support system. wasn't sure if the step thingies were for me, either, but i am working them, and really discovering some powerful and freeing things about myself. feel free to pm me if you want some more support
and....no need for any amount of sobriety to go to AA- as a matter of fact i've seen people show up drunk, though i doubt that's as effective
you got this! i'll be cheering you on from the east coast!

Luling

I don't know, I thought it was for anyone wanting to get sober. Why would some people find it helpful but not me? Am I going to be discouraged if I show up for a meeting? I've been trying to work up the nerve to reach out for help, and now I don't know what to do.

awuh1

Luling...1 person made that comment. Many others have said go. Why would you listen to that single person who does not even know you? GO... you will be glad you did. If you're not happy with the meeting I'll refund your previous misery.

regeneration

Luling... I'd just go. Try different meetings.

I've always thought of myself as socially anxious, but I remember a guy who chaired one of the meetings took me out for coffee afterwards and told me not to pin labels on myself. As he said it's how people will think about me and it's not always the whole picture. It kind of stuck in my head. I no longer say "I'm socially anxious", I now say "I'm a bit shy at times".

Also.. I find we're complex creatures and there are different ways to do things. You've nothing to lose by trying AA (or any recovery method). The good thing about AA is you can find it anywhere. I don't go loads or do the steps, and not sure yet if it's what I'll do in the long term... but it's there, and you may meet some great people. Ring the helpline and ask someone to take you.

Let us know how it goes.

hypochondriac

I know why you'd listen to that single person who said that...It really reassured me when I read this:

"Practically nobody looks forward to going to their first AA meeting. In most cases this in fact is an occasion of extreme shame, dread and despair. There is much fear and trembling. The majority of individuals going to AA for the first time are doing so reluctantly, either because they have promised someone else to go - or because they have been directed to attend by a judge, an employer, a therapist or an addictions treatment program. Even first timers who "go on their own" are usually in an intensely ambivalent and negative state. Nobody wishes to require the help that is provided by AA, nobody wishes to be an alcoholic, and as a result virtually everyone attending their first meeting wishes that they were someplace else doing something else. This attitude conditions and determines much of what is seen and heard and how it is interpreted. In general, and with only a few exceptions, the first time vistor is alert and looking for evidence that he is in the wrong place, with the wrong people, and taking the wrong approach to his drinking problem by coming to the meeting. He is, in brief, looking for reasons to justify his desire not to be there and not to return."

This is exactly what my mind was trying to do to me and this just reassured me that I was doing the right thing by going.

Personally I can't remember the last time I was made to feel so welcome, you'll love it x

KatMitch

I went to my first meeting about 3 years ago. I was terrified. When the leader asked if there were any there for the first time, I raised my hand. The whole rest of the meeting then focused on ME. I was the center of attention and had to actually talk in front of everyone (sitting in my seat still). I was shaking like a leaf. I did feel very accepted and cared about, but if I had known the hour was going to revolve around me, I wouldn't have raised my hand. I'm not sure if they're all like that, but the next week some poor kids raised his hand and it was the same for him. It turned out fine, but he didn't know like I didn't know.
This is just a "heads up" for you to know what may be coming?....Not a warning. They were all very very nice people. I should have gone back or I wouldn't be in the mess I'm in now.
Thank You.