Can't stop thinking about Rain in My Heart Documentary
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Can't stop thinking about Rain in My Heart Documentary
I watched this yesterday and I can't stop thinking about it. It completely terrified me and it was heartbreaking. The look on the young woman's face during her interviews...her talking about the death of her son...for her to die a few days later...seeing all of them just rotting, in front of your eyes on camera...it was just completely haunting....I will never forget it. Ever.
I don't want to end up like that. I don't want to go to that place.
What we are fighting is the real thing....this is scary.
I just had to say something because my mind is racing.
I don't want to end up like that. I don't want to go to that place.
What we are fighting is the real thing....this is scary.
I just had to say something because my mind is racing.
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Newcastle Upon Tyne
Posts: 122
I understand. The first time I watched it the images just kept going through my mind over and over. Vanda died eventually too - I'm not sure about the young fella. It is a stark reminder of what can happen to us and how our disease can escalate if we let it.
Another UK story is that of Stacey Rhymes who dies when she was just 24 of alcoholic liver failure. The BBC shot some very moving footage of her in her final hours and the sight of her yellow skin and eyes will always haunt me.
We should try to use these people's tragic stories as inspiration to never let our sobriety slip.
x
Another UK story is that of Stacey Rhymes who dies when she was just 24 of alcoholic liver failure. The BBC shot some very moving footage of her in her final hours and the sight of her yellow skin and eyes will always haunt me.
We should try to use these people's tragic stories as inspiration to never let our sobriety slip.
x
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Location: Houston, Texas
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I'll have to watch it sometime. I tend to disregard stories like that because I always figure they're so much worse off than me; I'll never end up that way. Then I think about just how far my drinking has progressed within the last couple of years, and I'm not so sure.
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Vancouver BC Canada
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It is pretty eye opening stuff that's for sure.
Perhaps at one time those folks drank like I have and possibly got worse or clearly no better. The level of addiction and dysfunction always get worse the longer people drink alcoholically , not better. Its progressive as long as its active is what I take away from Rain in my Heart and the end results are very disturbing and painful for the alcoholic and everyone left around them.
Maybe when I relapse , I am like you luling at some level , I convince myself I am not that bad. Truth is , I could be easily and I am never sure when a binge will stop....maybe the next one won't. I am not willing to test that any more.
I know I will leave here at some time and place but I'd prefer to be clean and sober on that day versus the agony of end stage alcoholism.
Perhaps at one time those folks drank like I have and possibly got worse or clearly no better. The level of addiction and dysfunction always get worse the longer people drink alcoholically , not better. Its progressive as long as its active is what I take away from Rain in my Heart and the end results are very disturbing and painful for the alcoholic and everyone left around them.
Maybe when I relapse , I am like you luling at some level , I convince myself I am not that bad. Truth is , I could be easily and I am never sure when a binge will stop....maybe the next one won't. I am not willing to test that any more.
I know I will leave here at some time and place but I'd prefer to be clean and sober on that day versus the agony of end stage alcoholism.
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The things that stuck with me from that documentary was when the doctor said that alcohol is alcohol, it's all processed in the same way (or words to that effect), how little they all seemed to drink, and wondering why they still drank when they were going in and out of hospital. A mixed response really. It made the whole hospital thing a bit more real for me seeing as I'd already been told I needed to stop drinking but still went on for months afterwards 
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Newcastle Upon Tyne
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It was quite disturbing how they continued to drink despite the doctor's words of warning - this is what I thought when I watched it one year ago and I continued to drink until April this year. I thought 'I'm nowhere near as bad as them!' I didn't drink much less than Vanda.
I think it's a very, very poignant film and I do think about it often x
I think it's a very, very poignant film and I do think about it often x
Professional Drunk
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Toronto
Posts: 465
I watched it recently too. The young fella with the jaundiced face was me 6 or 7 years ago and I am under no illusions that I wouldn't have ended up in hospital like him if I kept drinking.
Choosing Life
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Montana
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Yeah, it has a tendency to stay with you. I need to watch it again. The guy with the yellow eyes has haunted me since the first time I saw it. It really is heartbreaking but a stark and brutal picture of where all of us could end up. ALL of us. Thank you for the reminder.
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Originally Posted by epskie 
It was quite disturbing how they continued to drink despite the doctor's words of warning - this is what I thought when I watched it one year ago and I continued to drink until April this year. I thought 'I'm nowhere near as bad as them!' I didn't drink much less than Vanda.
I think it's a very, very poignant film and I do think about it often x
I think it's a very, very poignant film and I do think about it often x
A friend of mine is a nurse in an ER and she has told me some of the horror stories of the alcoholics in really bad shape that come in, and the surprising thing is when they are given the "stop drinking and live, or keep drinking and die" ultimatum, she said they almost always choose the latter.
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I can understand their dysfunction and compulsion; although I wasn't as physically ill as these fellow sufferers mentally I get it...I wanted to die, really and drinking myself to death seemed to be the way to go. The best part of me wanted to live, though and I made the decision to fight. I had a bad nosebleed when I was 25 (drinking a lot) and it scared me to death-blood gushing from my nose, going down my throat...it still didn't compel me to stop until quite a bit later. When I saw that poor young woman who died throwing up buckets of blood I thought of myself when I was her age, how frightened she must have been, how regretful but too late, too late...
I have been sober for seven months now. I've found the right medications for my psychiatric problems. I've never felt happier. I wish us all luck.
I have been sober for seven months now. I've found the right medications for my psychiatric problems. I've never felt happier. I wish us all luck.
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Originally Posted by Luling
I'll have to watch it sometime. I tend to disregard stories like that because I always figure they're so much worse off than me; I'll never end up that way. Then I think about just how far my drinking has progressed within the last couple of years, and I'm not so sure.
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Oh lordy, sorry (((Payton))) it wasn't because I mentioned it in another thread was it?
But yes, its big lightning bolt up the backside isn't it! I had to watch it again on a saturday night when there were people outside in their garden 'enjoying themselves' with a bbq and obviously alcohol. I was really low and had nostalga to the days when I could be like that... you know, be able to have fun with other drunk people.
I need stark realitys like this... Im over 9 months now but I was in a bad way last year (if you read my first post on here called 'my story') and I know I can never never get back to that place again x
But yes, its big lightning bolt up the backside isn't it! I had to watch it again on a saturday night when there were people outside in their garden 'enjoying themselves' with a bbq and obviously alcohol. I was really low and had nostalga to the days when I could be like that... you know, be able to have fun with other drunk people.
I need stark realitys like this... Im over 9 months now but I was in a bad way last year (if you read my first post on here called 'my story') and I know I can never never get back to that place again x
Grateful AA member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: In the middle of the woods, NJ
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Watching it right now scary and terryfing. They should put these types of shows on the TV to counteract the reality TV shows that pay celebrities tons of money to promote drunkeness.
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Originally Posted by Zee
Oh lordy, sorry (((Payton))) it wasn't because I mentioned it in another thread was it?
But yes, its big lightning bolt up the backside isn't it! I had to watch it again on a saturday night when there were people outside in their garden 'enjoying themselves' with a bbq and obviously alcohol. I was really low and had nostalga to the days when I could be like that... you know, be able to have fun with other drunk people.
I need stark realitys like this... Im over 9 months now but I was in a bad way last year (if you read my first post on here called 'my story') and I know I can never never get back to that place again x
But yes, its big lightning bolt up the backside isn't it! I had to watch it again on a saturday night when there were people outside in their garden 'enjoying themselves' with a bbq and obviously alcohol. I was really low and had nostalga to the days when I could be like that... you know, be able to have fun with other drunk people.
I need stark realitys like this... Im over 9 months now but I was in a bad way last year (if you read my first post on here called 'my story') and I know I can never never get back to that place again x
GirlfromCO, I agree. I related a lot to Mark. Long ago in the past I was a lot like that...the drunken melancholy, SI, weeping.
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Originally Posted by Payton
GirlfromCO, I agree. I related a lot to Mark. Long ago in the past I was a lot like that...the drunken melancholy, SI, weeping.
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