Sobriety is not as easy as I thought it would be
sobriety date 5-2-12
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 903
Sobriety is not as easy as I thought it would be
I am on day 41 sober from vicodin and booze. I have been struggling. I am in AA and have a sponsor, but ultimately it is up to me. I attend meetings daily and except for a few days, the first 30 days weren't that hard. The newness and excitement of sobriety is over now, and reality has set in. Last night I really wanted to give up. I wanted to say f&^% it and drink or get some pot. Instead I mustered up courage and called a woman whom I like from AA. I was scared and didn't know what to say. I started with "I'm struggling and I want to hear that it gets better". She was so kind and we talked about 15 min. and it did help.
I guess since I wasn't a daily drinker I thought this would be easy...I keep forgetting about the daily pill thing...and pot.
I won't give up. I need to hang in until IT happens.
I guess since I wasn't a daily drinker I thought this would be easy...I keep forgetting about the daily pill thing...and pot.
I won't give up. I need to hang in until IT happens.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 1,424
I totally feel you about the "newness of sobriety" being gone. But I keep telling myself that there are ups and downs, peaks and flows, the whole "This too shall pass thing." Silly as it sounds, I keep psyching myself up or making myself get excited for each new experience sober.. like a challenge, and when it's over, another new sober accomplishment, doesn't always work, but trying gives me something to do and distracts me.
sobriety date 5-2-12
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 903
Originally Posted by Sapling 
IT happens...When you work it aeo....What step are you working on?
sobriety date 5-2-12
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 903
In the meantime I am doing A LOT of painting. I have no idea what to do with all the stuff I am making- maybe a fall craft show? All I know is right now painting is the only thing thing that really makes me feel good and calm.
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
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Originally Posted by aeo1313
My sponsor is giving me worksheets for each step and I am almost done with 2. My goal is to get them done by Thursday and move on to 4. I think I need to really get going on them.
bb pg 58
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Join Date: Aug 2003
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You're right Aeo, it isn't easy, but you're doing great.
I had to figure out ways to deal with life because I had avoided dealing with so much and numbing myself with alcohol. So, I had to take baby steps and learn that it was okay to feel what I was feeling. I didn't have to allow the feeling to own me. I could feel it, and then let it go. I learned that music was something I often turned to, as was walking outside. Good for you for getting through that.
I had to figure out ways to deal with life because I had avoided dealing with so much and numbing myself with alcohol. So, I had to take baby steps and learn that it was okay to feel what I was feeling. I didn't have to allow the feeling to own me. I could feel it, and then let it go. I learned that music was something I often turned to, as was walking outside. Good for you for getting through that.
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Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Colorado
Posts: 1,071
Go to advanced posting and you'll see a paper clip icon - that's how you upload a picture. 41 days seems like a lot, and it is, but in terms of the rest of your life you're still really early on in your sobriety. Ups and downs are to be expected at this point. Some days it's going to feel awesome and super easy, and some days it's going to be tough. I'll have a year in a couple days, and I still have rough days. I try to remember that it's not going to last forever. If it's a really bad day I do what I can to be good to myself, give myself a break, without drinking. Or I try to think about the things I have sobriety to thank for. The point is, the bad feelings will pass, probably sooner than you think. You're still really new to this, so go easy on yourself. It's okay to have a bad day - it doesn't mean you're failing at sobriety.
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Canada. About as far south as you can get
Posts: 4,768
Originally Posted by aeo1313
I am on day 41 sober from vicodin and booze. I have been struggling. I am in AA and have a sponsor, but ultimately it is up to me. I attend meetings daily and except for a few days, the first 30 days weren't that hard. The newness and excitement of sobriety is over now, and reality has set in. Last night I really wanted to give up. I wanted to say f&^% it and drink or get some pot. Instead I mustered up courage and called a woman whom I like from AA. I was scared and didn't know what to say. I started with "I'm struggling and I want to hear that it gets better". She was so kind and we talked about 15 min. and it did help.
I guess since I wasn't a daily drinker I thought this would be easy...I keep forgetting about the daily pill thing...and pot.
I won't give up. I need to hang in until IT happens.
I guess since I wasn't a daily drinker I thought this would be easy...I keep forgetting about the daily pill thing...and pot.
I won't give up. I need to hang in until IT happens.
As bad as it gets sometimes just remember that all the other oldtimers have gone through the same thing (Yes, the same thing. Your problems are no worse than theirs were) and can help you through it.
You will soon be able to pass it on to the newcomer and that's when life gets more fulfilling.
All the best.
Bob R
sobriety date 5-2-12
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 903
I went to advanced setting and tried to upload. they are jpg format and it won't let me.
When my husband gets home I will have him try unless there is an obvious step someone can help me with.
When my husband gets home I will have him try unless there is an obvious step someone can help me with.
sobriety date 5-2-12
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 903
sobriety date 5-2-12
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 903
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