Relapse...rinse...repeat
Lady Blaze
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Athens, GA
Posts: 85
Relapse...rinse...repeat
Since April I have had many more sober days than high days, and I'm proud of myself for that. But I keep slipping...
I write my sobriety dates inside of my NA book and I've had to scratch 3 out since the beginning of June. I want to get clean. I want to stop this... instead I keep slipping.
How do you guys deal with relapsing? How do you prevent it?
I'm without a car or a way to get to meetings, and I know that all of you will say for me to get to a meeting, but thats out of the question right now.
Please...anything...words of encouragement...suggestions... I just want to be free.
I write my sobriety dates inside of my NA book and I've had to scratch 3 out since the beginning of June. I want to get clean. I want to stop this... instead I keep slipping.
How do you guys deal with relapsing? How do you prevent it?
I'm without a car or a way to get to meetings, and I know that all of you will say for me to get to a meeting, but thats out of the question right now.
Please...anything...words of encouragement...suggestions... I just want to be free.
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
You are using prescription narcotics? Quitting that has got to be tough without support. Have you tried calling and getting a ride to an NA meeting? Service to other addicts is encouraged.
I don't know the particulars, but it seems to me that as long as you have access to your DOC, you will be tempted, and you will use. Rehab will remove you from these temptations. But I guess if meetings are out of the question, so is rehab?
So you tell me, how are you going to stay away from the drugs? What can you do to ensure that you don't contact your dealers?
I don't know the particulars, but it seems to me that as long as you have access to your DOC, you will be tempted, and you will use. Rehab will remove you from these temptations. But I guess if meetings are out of the question, so is rehab?
So you tell me, how are you going to stay away from the drugs? What can you do to ensure that you don't contact your dealers?
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
I'm without a car or a way to get to meetings, and I know that all of you will say for me to get to a meeting, but thats out of the question right now
you have a way to get the drugs and alcohol, you have a way to get to a meeting.
relapse-To regress after partial recovery from illness.
you cant relapse til you get clean and sober.
for me a relapse would end with a drink/drug.
i deal with it by not going into one. i prevent it by doing whatever i have t do to get further away from my last drunk.
when you want to be free more than you want to be high, you will do whatever you have to do to get to a meeting.
you have a way to get the drugs and alcohol, you have a way to get to a meeting.
relapse-To regress after partial recovery from illness.
you cant relapse til you get clean and sober.
for me a relapse would end with a drink/drug.
i deal with it by not going into one. i prevent it by doing whatever i have t do to get further away from my last drunk.
when you want to be free more than you want to be high, you will do whatever you have to do to get to a meeting.
Lady Blaze
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Athens, GA
Posts: 85
My drugs have always been handed to me. I never really had to work for them. So people telling me to work as hard to get clean as I did to get the pills doesn't really help. Thanks anyway.
I live 20 miles away from the nearest NA meeting and have no money at all to pay for someone else's gas. I can't even buy food. My bf wants to take me to meetings, but only to open ones so he can go too, and that hinders me from sharing and I dont like him being there and I prefer closed meetings. I don't have a working phone as it got turned off because my mom didnt pay the bill so I can't call anyone, and no one gave me any phone numbers when I went to the one NA meeting I could go to so I have no one to call.
I live 20 miles away from the nearest NA meeting and have no money at all to pay for someone else's gas. I can't even buy food. My bf wants to take me to meetings, but only to open ones so he can go too, and that hinders me from sharing and I dont like him being there and I prefer closed meetings. I don't have a working phone as it got turned off because my mom didnt pay the bill so I can't call anyone, and no one gave me any phone numbers when I went to the one NA meeting I could go to so I have no one to call.
Lady Blaze
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Athens, GA
Posts: 85
Originally Posted by doggonecarl 
You are using prescription narcotics? Quitting that has got to be tough without support. Have you tried calling and getting a ride to an NA meeting? Service to other addicts is encouraged.
I don't know the particulars, but it seems to me that as long as you have access to your DOC, you will be tempted, and you will use. Rehab will remove you from these temptations. But I guess if meetings are out of the question, so is rehab?
So you tell me, how are you going to stay away from the drugs? What can you do to ensure that you don't contact your dealers?
I don't know the particulars, but it seems to me that as long as you have access to your DOC, you will be tempted, and you will use. Rehab will remove you from these temptations. But I guess if meetings are out of the question, so is rehab?
So you tell me, how are you going to stay away from the drugs? What can you do to ensure that you don't contact your dealers?
I agree with you that if I can get to them, I will use them. I don't have the money for a stay in rehab... I wish I did.
I don't know how I can stay away from the drugs... I cant go no contact with my parents. I dont have the money to move out...
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,967
I've been to our AA office in Washington, D.C. and on the wall is a photo of AA's founder, Bill W.'s handwriting where he had written notes to his wife, Lois, about quitting alcohol for good.
He wrote this to her on at least 5 occasions, maybe more.
It took me many times to try to stay stopped before it finally sunk in that I kept doing the same thing over and over expecting different results, but getting the same result every time. Last year it finally clicked!
Keep trying! See if you can change something this time around.... Hopefully, you will get it, too!! How badly do you want to stay stopped or do you want to continue this cycle?
I know you can do it!!
He wrote this to her on at least 5 occasions, maybe more.
It took me many times to try to stay stopped before it finally sunk in that I kept doing the same thing over and over expecting different results, but getting the same result every time. Last year it finally clicked!
Keep trying! See if you can change something this time around.... Hopefully, you will get it, too!! How badly do you want to stay stopped or do you want to continue this cycle?
I know you can do it!!
Lady Blaze
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Athens, GA
Posts: 85
Originally Posted by Sapling
It's not going to be easy for you if you have free drugs and a lot of excuses. What do you think would be a good way to do it?...Any ideas?
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
I mean...You're BF wants to take you to a meeting...But you won't go because you can't share?...That's a little much. How about checking yourself in a clean living house so you can get away from the free drugs you are surrounded with?....I mean...If you want to do this...It's going to take some action. You have to want to stop...And to anything you can...To make that happen...Or it won't.
Lady Blaze
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Athens, GA
Posts: 85
Originally Posted by sugarbear1
I've been to our AA office in Washington, D.C. and on the wall is a photo of AA's founder, Bill W.'s handwriting where he had written notes to his wife, Lois, about quitting alcohol for good.
He wrote this to her on at least 5 occasions, maybe more.
It took me many times to try to stay stopped before it finally sunk in that I kept doing the same thing over and over expecting different results, but getting the same result every time. Last year it finally clicked!
Keep trying! See if you can change something this time around.... Hopefully, you will get it, too!! How badly do you want to stay stopped or do you want to continue this cycle?
I know you can do it!!
He wrote this to her on at least 5 occasions, maybe more.
It took me many times to try to stay stopped before it finally sunk in that I kept doing the same thing over and over expecting different results, but getting the same result every time. Last year it finally clicked!
Keep trying! See if you can change something this time around.... Hopefully, you will get it, too!! How badly do you want to stay stopped or do you want to continue this cycle?
I know you can do it!!
What are some of the things that helped you?
I'm not giving up. I REALLY want to be sober. As I've said, I'm 22 and have been an addict for 8 years. I'm tired of it. I'm ready to grow up and move on. Things just keep getting in my way... If my car was running, I'd be at meetings everyday. I want this cycle to end. Both of my parents are addicts / alcoholics and they aren't any help to me. I don't have any friends that I can get support from. My boyfriend doesn't understand. This forum and online chat meetings and my NA and AA books are all I have...
Lady Blaze
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Athens, GA
Posts: 85
Originally Posted by Sapling
I mean...You're BF wants to take you to a meeting...But you won't go because you can't share?...That's a little much. How about checking yourself in a clean living house so you can get away from the free drugs you are surrounded with?....I mean...If you want to do this...It's going to take some action. You have to want to stop...And to anything you can...To make that happen...Or it won't.
Do Clean Living Houses cost anything? Like I said, I have no money. I'm afraid to leave home also because my dad is violent towards my mom if I'm not here.
I'm dying to stop. I cant live like this anymore...
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
Originally Posted by WarriorQueen
Both of my parents are addicts / alcoholics and they aren't any help to me.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
Originally Posted by WarriorQueen
Do Clean Living Houses cost anything? Like I said, I have no money. I'm afraid to leave home also because my dad is violent towards my mom if I'm not here.
I'm dying to stop. I cant live like this anymore...
I'm dying to stop. I cant live like this anymore...
Lady Blaze
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Athens, GA
Posts: 85
Originally Posted by Sapling
Don't you think this is your number one problem here?...And until you change that...Nothing else is going to change?
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: CA.....Hometown : Sioux Falls
Posts: 2,624
There will always be times and places when there will be no support and you'll need to rely solely on YOU. Along with SR I use Rational Recovery for the the "addictive voice" that's always wanting it's drinking pleasure....If you go to the website it has a Crash Course. It only takes a few minutes to read. And that I do daily. Some people use that along with AA...Sober since this April 21...relapse is not an option (although your addictive voice will tell you it is)... Glad you are with us.
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
First of all, your posting here shows me you want to quit, and you are looking for answers. For that you should be commended. But you are in a challenging mess.
Please don't get defensive. We only see what gets posted, by you, and maybe we leap to assumptions, but everyone taking the time to respond to you would love to see you kick this addiction to the curb.
However, you are in a situation with some pretty screwed up dynamics. From everything you are telling us, the only option you have is to say, "No!"
How is that working for you? Not good. You are going to have to think outside the box. As long as your list of "can'ts" is longer than your "cans" you are going to be struggling mightily.
You HAVE to get out of your current situation. We can't tell you how to do that. But as long as you are home, with enabling parents, and access to drugs, I foresee big problems. It is easy for me to say, leave. I'm not in your shoes. But YOU have to do something. Establish bounderies where your mom doesn't give you drugs no matter how much you beg, threaten or curse.
Originally Posted by WarriorQueen
I don't have any ideas. That's why I posted here looking for help. But if all I'm going to get is people telling me that I'm just making excuses and not really trying as hard as I can when I am... That isn't very helpful.
However, you are in a situation with some pretty screwed up dynamics. From everything you are telling us, the only option you have is to say, "No!"
How is that working for you? Not good. You are going to have to think outside the box. As long as your list of "can'ts" is longer than your "cans" you are going to be struggling mightily.
You HAVE to get out of your current situation. We can't tell you how to do that. But as long as you are home, with enabling parents, and access to drugs, I foresee big problems. It is easy for me to say, leave. I'm not in your shoes. But YOU have to do something. Establish bounderies where your mom doesn't give you drugs no matter how much you beg, threaten or curse.
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